Wow: check out this premonitory recent thread about companies that make seemingly wackily unrelated products.
Who knew that Randall Munroe posted here under the name @HeyHomie? Not I. 
Darn shame that thread got drowned out by examples of plain old merger and acquisition activity. Which IMO was not the OP’s intent.
Nope. I’m actually secretly Weird Al.
“We have two ‘in case of fire, break glass’ boxes, which you pick between based on how big of a problem the fire is. One has an extinguisher, and one has sticks, marshmallows, graham crackers, and chocolate.”
My sister, who was a volunteer* fire fighter, said they had a cabinet in their firetruck labeled “when all else fails” which had marshmallows and stuff to make smores.
Brian
* “per call” is a better term, as she was paid while on duty.
“Once we’ve fully explored this space, we can start varying the number of princesses.”
(Sorry, a late reply) It’s not just the heat, it’s the humidity. Dew points in the cave are also in the triple digits Fahrenheit, well above body temperature, so when you go in not only does your sweat not evaporate (leading to heat stroke and death) but water starts condensing on your skin - and inside your lungs, leading to drowning (also death).
I always thought that princess would be extremely high maintenance.
It’s basically 100% humidity inside and outside your lungs. I see no reason that water would condense inside your lungs any faster than water is leaving. It would simply stay in equilibrium. So no drowning, I don’t believe.
But the heat would definitely kill you. And sweating would be useless. (Technically the sweat would evaporate as usual on your skin, but water vapor from the air would be condensing at the exact same rate on your skin, resulting in no net cooling.)
The inside surfaces of your lungs are at a temperature below the dew point. When the air hits this cooler surface water will condense on the surface.
Upon further thought, that makes sense in an extremely hot, very humid environment (like the Crystal Cave). The open question is whether the hyperthermia or pulmonary edema kills the person first.
This paper talks about the issue, specifically discussing the death of a miner in the cave, although they do not definitively say what killed him.
It’s theoretically possible to drown, but you’re going to die of heatstroke long before you die from drowning.
All a moot point anyway; the caves flooded in 2015 when the mining operation shut off the pumps that were keeping them dry. They are now inaccessible to everyone.
That moves drowning up to the top of the death risk…
heat bats
Or crystalline entities.
The Hortas did it. Plural.
We all are sooo doo-oomed!
I don’t believe in Devils in the Dark…
How hot is the water? Are they accessible with scuba gear?
Kryptonite poisoning.
The water has to be between 54-58 C (129-136 F) in order for the crystals to form. The cave is evidently under 500-600 feet (150-160 m) of water. Scuba divers can correct me, but I don’t think there’s any gear invented that could keep someone cool long enough. At that depth, there will be significant decompression time needed.
Can you say “sous vide”? I thought you could. Yikes!!
“All discussions of daylight saving time policy are doomed by a mix of contradictory, inconsistent, and impossible preferences, which is why I think the only thing we can really hope to do is to make it worse.”