Not for the faint of heart. If that’s you, stop now.
Ok. Now I accept that they’re not sure whether it’s a homicide, mutilation, or fraud. HOWEVER…Wouldn’t the presence of ANY HUMAN BODY PART – much LESS that particular body part – in a bottle of fruit punch be considered a CRIME? How could they not know whether a crime was involved?
Unless the bottle was clearly labeled “NEW! Ocean Spray Cran-Pecker!”, surely the FDA would be interested in pressing a charge or two?
Any law-enforcement types out there wanna clarify this for me?
Right…but what I meant was, setting aside the method by which said bottle of fruit punch became a jar of gherkins in the first place, wouldn’t the mere fact that it’s THERE be a crime in and of itself? I mean surely there’s a health hazard, here…and quality control at the bottling factory must leave something to be desired.
(Other than the bottles themselves, which someone desired in a decidedly unnatural fashion…)
I’m reminded of Dennis Miller’s suggestion for Asians who consider tiger-penis soup to be an aphrodesiac; something about having the tiger teabag his dick in boullion…
i hope for his own sake that euty has read this thread. see, euty, having sex with bottles is all fun and games til someone loses a penis!
and lsura, the phosphoric acid in your diet coke would have dissolved any appurtenance that had the misfortune to find its way in there by the time you opened it. hee hee.