yep It ain't my house

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

To my mother’s boyfriend AKA Assholio

You’re right
It’s not my house
But it isn’t your house either
It is my mother’s house
But it is MY home
and it was my home long before you got here
and will be my home long after you are cold in the ground
and I’m not your daughter
I am not your step-daughter
even if you marry my mother you will still never be my step-father
you are my mother’s bf
nothing more
your job is to make her happy
stay out of my life

you do not have the right to question me
or my decisions
what I make is none of your business

you do not have the right to tell me what to do
I do not answer to you

when my mother hands me the keys to her car
you do not have the right to say
I will let you drive your mothers car when you do xyz for me
well excuse the fuck out of me
It’s HER car I think that makes it HER decision

when I ask my son to do something
I do not need your backup
You do not need to yell at him because you think he didn’t respond fast enough
and when I tell you that it’s okay for him to finish what he is doing first
do not yell at me for undermining your authority
You have NO authority
my son and I got along just fine before you came into my mother’s life
and we will continue to do just fine long after your sorry ass is rotting in the ground

You don’t get to correct my great-nieces and nephews when they call me Nana
that is the name I decided I wanted to be called
I know I am not their grandmother
tough shit you don’t get to decide what they call me

and yet you want them to call you Poppy
well you ain’t their fucking grandfather either

and I will refer to my 11 year old dog as puppy whenever I want
dogs are like kids, they are still your babies no matter how old

and nobody needs you to monitor every single bite of food that any of the kids eat
you don’t get to tell them how much of what they should eat and when and ruin the meal for the rest of us with your constant harping

and the next time my niece invites all of us to dinner
don’t instantly assume you get to sit at the head of the table
it’s not your house
you fucked up the seating arrangement which put my sister between her current and ex husbands, which pissed off the current husband (he needs to grow up and get over it), stressed out my sister (who is way too much like my mother when it comes to men), and well the ex is a laid back kind of guy, didn’t bother him at all.

and oh yeah
I do like my ex-bil
yeah he treated my sister badly
but believe me she gave as good as she got
you weren’t there they have been divorced for over 20 years
no matter what he IS the father of my nieces, they love him and I love them
so yeah I like him and I am cordial to him
and you don’t get to tell me I shouldn’t like him
it really is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS
and if you ever ever ever so much as even think of turning that door knob again and walking into my bedroom
Be prepared for sharp pointy objects aimed at your head
and then you had the nerve to bitch to my mother about why do I keep my door locked?
obviously because I have to

and mother
the correct response to that question should NOT have been because she has always kept her door locked
the correct response should have been why are you trying to walk into my daughter’s bedroom
what in the hell kind of man thinks it’s okay to give a quick knock and try to walk into a woman’s bedroom!!!
I don’t care that he does it to his daughter and his adult granddaughters because that is how it is done in his family
that is fucking sick and you know it
I know it wasn’t anything sexual
but it is still way inappropriate for any man to walk into a woman’s bedroom uninvited

you are half the problem that he is the way he is because you let men walk all over you and take over your life
you think men are bigger, stronger, smarter, more capable
and the man is always right
and you think a woman without a man is nothing

I’ve put up with his dominating bullying disrespectful behavior long enough
out of respect for you
but I am long out of patience
as long as you are happy with it, go for it
I know you like playing the poor pitiful helpless woman who needs the big strong man to take care of her
whatever:rolleyes:

but I have had enough

2

LiveJournal

3

Also, I don’t know how old you are but if your son is nearly 17 years old (according to another thread of yours), maybe it’s time to find your own place.

4

So, you’ve decided to get a job, rent an apartment, and move yourself and the babies you popped out into your own place?!?

HAHAHA… Of course not, you just mean you’re going to amp up the bitching, the moaning, the pouting, and the general all-around shittiness to eleven.

5

Honest first thought:
Buy a locked journal. (or move the fuck out)

Honest second thought:
Shouldn’t this be in the Pit?

Honest third thought:
Don’t you have any real-life friends you can bitch about all this to?

Honest fourth thought:
Maybe you should print this out and give it to all the people in your life who obviously need to see it.

Expected sympathetic answer:
Oh, honey, that sounds awful. I hope your mom wises up and kicks that asshole to the curb real soon!

6

Mine was mom should give her three months to get a job and her own place and drop her off at the homeless shelter if she doesn’t.

7

I think that’s the key. This guy does sound obnoxious, but your mom is allowing him to be like that. If that’s what makes her happy so be it, but focus on making a life of your own away from them so you don’t have to deal with it.

8

I don’t know what you think a step-father is, but it’s a man who isn’t your biological father who is married to your mother.

This rant is confusing. It sounds like it was written by a young teenager, but it’s about a middle aged woman. Buh?

9

Yeah, I figured this was definitely a teenager writing. Then once she mentioned a son, maybe late teens/early twenties. But then…teenage son? Great nieces and nephews? I do like the image of the OP tossing her walker in a rage as she screeches, “You’re not my real dad!” before going to drown her sorrows at the Early Bird Special…

10

I just needed to vent

I moved in when my son was a toddler because I got ill, couldn’t work and I didn’t like asking for money every month with no end in sight as to when I would be able to work again.

Not that I need to explain any of that to anybody.

I have a job.
I can afford to leave but right now is not the right time.
My mother does not want me to go anyway, every time I start to pack up she asks me to stay.

She travels a lot and she likes someone living here taking care of things while she is gone. My sister lives out of state, my nieces have families and no time.
Half the time it is just my son and me and the dog.
It’s an arrangement that benefits both of us, the rent is cheaper here, and yes I do pay rent, and utilities, buy food.

Not that it’s anybody’s right to judge when they don’t know the whole situation.
It wouldn’t matter all that much if I did move.
He’s her boyfriend and he’s not going anywhere.
If I have my own place and invite her over he’s going to come with her, and I would never be so disrespectful to her to say she can’t bring him.
(Unlike my sister who has done that and wants to break them up).
He annoys the hell out of the family who doesn’t live here, just not to the same degree.

I get mad at her because she lets him take over but that is who she is. She’s 76, she’s not going to change.

I also blame myself for letting it get to the point that I am so angry, because I should have put him in his place a long time ago. I felt like it was her place to do it because he is her bf.
And I totally expected nasty comments so what
I needed to vent and did

You don’t like anything I post, nobody is holding a gun to your head making you read it now are they?

see
I am learning to stand up for myself!

It’s about time

11

If you were really standing up for yourself, you’d do what’s best for your mental health and get the fuck out despite your mom’s wishes. As it is, you’re totally subservient to your mom, and you’re coming in second to your stepdad (which he is, whether you call him that or not). Sorry to burst your bubble, and stuff.

You don’t sound like the terrible mooch you originally came off as in the OP, but you *severely need *to get your own place. For your kid’s sake, and your own.

12

You cannot walk into a room full of strangers and gripe and expect them to turn off their brains and sympathize with you entirely. The fact you think you can makes be believe you aren’t so easy to live with either. Of course we have a right to judge. Or do you think this too will be your house long after WE are rotting in our graves?

I do understand he is dominating and grating on your nerves and you are well within your rights and responsibilities to draw a line at your room and son but your mother is the one to determine what behavior is allowed in HER home otherwise and many of the things you mentioned were petty annoyances which to HER may be endearing. Sweet dreams are made of these.

Get your own place as soon as you can and even when you invite them over you can tell him how things will be in YOUR house.

13

Haikus are hard.