My sister once cut out this chart from some tabloid which purported to predict the likely success of a marriage from the birth order of the two people. All I remember is that of the various combinations – “male with younger sister and female middle child” or “male with two older brothers and female with older sister” or whatever – the combination of two only children got the will-never-work-out rating.
So, let’s get those babies conceived! I mean, if you can’t trust a tabloid to supply accurate predictions, where can you go? MISTRESS CLEO?
The reason I have always heard for the seeming Viagra/BCP contradiction is that Viagra corrects an actual pathology. Impotence is not a normal physiologic state, nor is it a natural and inevitable consequence of aging (although it isn’t an unexpected one). Viagra corrects this deficit, allowing an approximation of normal function.
BCPs, on the other hand, do not correct any sort of natural deficit. In fact, they introduce a deficit–the inability to reproduce. It would be more analogous to a vasectomy, which, to my knowledge, most health plans won’t cover, either.
I don’t really buy this argument, myself. After all, most health plans do cover well-pregnancy care, and pregnancy is not a pathologic state. My guess is that they have compared the cost of paying for BCPs vs. paying for maternal care for any resulting unwanted pregnancies and found the latter to be cheaper. (Sounds odd, but you have to consider that most women will buy the BCPs for themselves anyway, since they’re not that expensive.)
Not to start a slagfest again, but Nimune, you’re making the rest of us who have made an informed decision not to have kids look bad. I don’t particularly like kids either, but I completely respect other people’s decision to have them. What you have described here sounds fairly hostile.
I don’t know anyone who has tried this, but doctors might be more willing to operate if you give them subtle (or not-so-subtle) hints that you probably shouldn’t be raising children. Some suggestions:
Wear a South Park T-shirt to the office.
When the doctor asks why you don’t want kids, say you can’t afford to because of the high cost of crack. If he suggests you quit, act highly offended.
Bring weapons to the office.
Tell the doctor you’re too busy to care for a child. When he/she asks what you’re so busy with, answer “sex”.
When the doctor says “What if you change your mind?”, tell him/her “The voices in my head said the same thing”.
Featherlou: Fairly hostile? FAIRLY hostile? If I were any more hostile, I’d be arrested for assault. It’s supposed to be an INSULT, ya rube. You’re not supposed to like it!
Look, I don’t hate all kids. I’m related to several, who are all perfectly lovely. However, where I live, there has recently been an explosion of aging Yuppies having kids, and a conservative 99.99% of them have absolutely no parenting skills. Let me give you an example:
I like to sleep in on Saturdays. It’s the only day of the week I have that luxury. However, the guy living across the street from me has a little girl whom he simply cannot control. Every Saturday, I hear him out in front of his house, bellowing at his kid. My favorite went somehting like this:
“Ehlanna, go back inside honey.”
“Ehlanna, go inside right now.”
“Get away from the car Ehlanna! I mean it!”
“Ehlanna, get out of the car RIGHT NOW!”
“Unlock the door, Ehlanna!”
“EHLANNA, YOU UNLOCK THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW!”
and so on and so on, usually for a good twenty minutes. This happens with such perfect regularity I can only assume he goes through the same routine every morning, except I’m not at home to hear it (thank God). My whole neighborhood is similarly infested. And the parents, naturally, will not shut up about how wonderful their brats are. “Ooo, Billy did the CUTEST thing today!” After hearing fifteen of these stories in an afternoon, I get kinda sick of them. NB to all parents out there: your kid ain’t special. I’ve heard the same adorable bowel movement story a dozen times already, and I didn’t much care the first time. So excuse me if I’m “fairly hostile.”
Nobody is saying you have to like kids. We’re just suggesting that perhaps it’s less than civil to treat an entire subclass of society with such hostility.
Just a suggestion of course–but if I reacted one hair less than assualt upon the mere sight of a certain type of person…well, I’d worry.
Hyperbole, by the way, is exaggerating something for effect. Like saying you almost died laughing at the last Gallagher concert. Yeah, maybe your sides hurt, but you weren’t actually close to DEATH. (more’s the pity?)