You Beat Another Person? How Yoooooooooooooooou Doin?

The BBQ Pit
221

First things first: SolGrundy, congrats on that post. It’s art. Truly.

Diane, no, I wasn’t aware that it was verboten to mention your secret little society where you hang out and tear people to bits, jr. mod. But I will certainly keep it in mind. Thank you so much for pointing it out. And, nice job on squirming out of responding to Sol’s reasoned, intelligent post. Heaven forfend you lower your nose enough to see the meaning, instead of picking apart the syntax and precise wording. :wally

When several people tell you in several different ways their exact reasoning for posting what was posted, and you still refuse to acknowledge it, other than to tear it apart so you can further stomp the ever loving shit out of someone for your and your buddies’ pleasure and enjoyment; THAT is a feeding frenzy. When you get your pals to join in and back you up and then congratulate each other in a way that shows you are actually coming close to sexual excitement over it; THAT is a feeding frenzy. But when you hold everyone else to your narrow minded self righteous view point, and refuse to listen to anyone’s opinion unless it agrees with yours, that’s not a feeding frenzy. That’s just a sad, angry little girl who can’t be happy unless she’s making someone else hurt.

222

Diane, Re: Feeding frenzy. First, I think that we can dismiss out of hand this false notion that folks are seeing this as a feeding frenzy for no other reason than the fact that they disagree. That notion is flat out foolish.

This is a feeding frenzy because several posters, seeing weakness in another, took the opportunity to add to that person’s pain rather than offering encouragement or just keeping quiet. It is also a feeding frenzy, if I may be honest, because you are the OP. Like it or not, you have a reputation for being rather caustic and for having a pack of groupies that follow your lead (the so-called “Bitch Brigade”). I am guessing that you won’t care, but those are the facts.

All of this is not to say that the topic of reversing genders in the realm of domestic violence would not make an excellent Great Debate, but the sad fact is that rather than choose to approach the issue from that angle you had to take the opportunity to be hurtful.

223

SolGrundy: Bravo! Standing ovation! What a masterpiece! Can I give you a high-five? :smiley:

By the way, Diane, I posted earlier that I made a mistake about the issue of her losing her job. I misread it, in the same way you have misread many of my posts. At least I can admit it. So drop it and move on. I still think her boyfriend sounds like a jerk. Just my opinion. I know you think he is Mr. Wonderful though…maybe torie can provide you with his number so you can console him in his time of pain and injury or send him flowers in the hospital…

Diane, you and your posse are just mean people. Nothing more needs to be said.

224

Excuse me? My little secret society? I don’t participate in that vile anonymous LJ shit, so you totally missed the ballpark there sweetie. I will agree that I posted to it twice – under my own name, and it was a compliment towards Coldie and Heloise. Trust me, if I have something to say, I’ll say it without hiding behind an anonymous post. Again, I feel like I have been put into a position to defend something that has been pulled out of someone’s ass.

Either prove that I participate in that shit or apologize for making unfounded accusations,

You are pulling shit from your ass, just like I mentioned in my post above. I didn’t get “my pals” to do shit here. I posted an OP, didn’t link it to any other website (except to the original MPSIMS thread), didn’t email anyone to come see, I didn’t join forces with anyone nor did I place a call to arms. Nothing.

Is it beyond your comprehension that I made a post and :::gasp::: other people just happened to agree and support me because they felt the same way? There is no junior high, shark frenzie bullshit going on here. You and a few others are using that as some paranoid and bizarre justification to explain how a group of people might feel differently about a topic than you do. Could it just be that we all just happen to agree?

When Sol can offer a post that isn’t filled with hateful bile, then I will consider what he has said and respond to it. Until then, I give it all the respect and acknowledgment that it deserves. None.

225

Just a question.

Am I held to a higher standard than the rest of the board when it comes to posting a Pit thread when something bothers me? I have explained over and over why the MPSIMS thread bothered me enough to create a Pit thread. I personally feel it is a pretty legitimate reason to be angered (again – the justifications for violence and endorsing her behavior through flirts). If I was “hurtful”, which I think is bordering on exaggeration, it is because I am truly angered by the things that have been said.

If there are different rules and standards for me then I would love to hear them.

226

:eek: :eek: :eek:
Because your own posts have been so reasoned and constructive, yes? Well, in that case, why didn’t you just say so? Hells bells, girl, that makes PERFECT sense.

Or is it more along the lines of “It’s my thread, and I’ll acknowledge whoever’s tone pleases me, and if anyone doesn’t like it, they can just leave and post to something they DO like”? In which case, may I remind you, you had the perfect opportunity to do the same thing yesterday, with torie’s thread. But you just had to start rippin’. Several people have explained why they feel this thread is a feeding frenzy. You have yet to show us why you feel it isn’t. Aside from calling us “drama queens” who can’t read.

However; I do apologize for the accusation if it was unfounded. And that is sincere.

227

Posse my ass. :rolleyes:

Why is it beyond your comprehension that more than one person might have the same feelings on a subject?

Before you start screaming about the injustices done to someone, I suggest you read a little bit more carefully so you won’t have to explain (more than once) how you misread something. From your first post in this thread you were bound and determine to make me (and others) look as bad as you possibly could by creating and exaggerating bullshit. Now you have had to backpeddle like crazy. This makes you look like a moron.

Ya know what? Then don’t.

228

Thank you SolGrundy. I don’t think it could have been said better.

Diane, I think it’s time to quit while you think you’re ahead. You argue that posts against you are just hateful bile and yet you take the same stance against those who are trying to support torie. So how about trying to make a post that doesn’t involve badmouthing anyone, just putting your point across. Also you keep saying that the matter of the violent episode is over. So fucking stick to your word you hypocritical bitch. Just look at one of your recent posts:

We never fucking said that!!! Never was we in support of her becuase of the violent episode. We were supportive becuase she was feeling down and asked for some support. Shit do you kick beggars in the fucking street if they ask you for money?? Give me a cite where we say that and be fucking done with it.

If you can’t make a sensible post with that advice in mind, then here’s one more tip. Give the fuck up.

229

Yeah, because calling people “pathetic” for coddling and responding to a flirt request made by someone who just admitted abuse and having others make excuses for violence (because she is a daintly little female) is exactly the same thing as the nasty shit posted by Sol and ShaolinRabbit. Gotcha.

Everyone in this thread and any other thread on the board has the right to choose who they respond to and who they ignore. If you don’t like my tone, you don’t have to response. I have that same choice in deciding whether or not I am going to respond to the hateful screechings of those two.

If they want me to consider anything they have to say they can tone down the hateful shit. Until then, they won’t be awknowledged.

230

Wow. I don’t know whether to laugh or shake my head at this. Way to prove SolGrundy’s point. How in the world can you possibly say SolGrundy’s long, detailed and thoughtful post was the result of a “blabbering, hysterical idiot.”? You’re amazing. Why don’t you try actually reading some of the posts directed at you instead of just reaching into your grab bag of random insults for those you’re too lazy to deal with on the same respectful and thoughtful level they deemed you worthy of?

And SolGrundy, thank you for that wonderful post. I’ve been following this thread and abstaining from posting because there was so much I wanted to say but I had no idea where to even begin. You articulated my thoughts perfectly.

And Green Bean, go back and read the second half of page 1 and first half of page 2 of this thread. It’s not that there’s a group of people agreeing on a common subject. It’s more the high school, immature, bitchy “high five” behavior of those who do agree (usually only done by 2 or 3 of the “usual suspects” in a thread, not everyone who agrees) that give off the “feeding frenzy” vibe.

Really is typical bully behavior. Very classy, indeed.

Of course knowing Diane, she’ll just respond with “yeah whatever you yammering idiot” which is Dianespeak for “I can’t form a logical response to that”.

231

Where’ve you been? :wink:

This may strike you rather suddenly and cause a shock Diane, but you were the first one to post in this thread, and you set the tone.

If you figured calling me a “stupid dumbfuck” was a good way to start a respectful and reasonable conversation, I apologize for misinterpreting that. Apparently at your bridge club they do things a bit differently than my aquaintences do.

232

Maureen - thanks for the apology.

233

Holy shit, I think I get it now. Diana only responds sensibly to people who see her way. Yeah by brother does that. He’s four years old. I’m not saying that you are behaving like a four year old. I’ve just expressed an opinion. :rolleyes:

Stop your Goddamn belly-aching Diana becuase it turned from an argument to this nagging whine about 3 pages ago. You have made your point so stop, unless of course you are so childish as to want the last word.

234

I didn’t claim that I have been posting sunshine and rainbows here and not have said anything caustic.

I found the behavior in that other thread disgusting and pathetic. I still stand behind those quotes you posted, 100%.

So what’s your point?

235

One possibility to think about is that the folks that are engaging you are not doing so in any hope that you will change your mind or that you will stop for a moment to consider how hurtful you are being. Rather, we are responding for the benefit of the others that may be reading this thread so that they know that your behavior is not universally condoned and will not go unchallenged.

236

Bullshit. You’re showing selective memory regarding the false accusations you and nicetea threw at her boyfriend. It only took a cursory review of this thread to bring up this little gem:

Torie’s boyfriend was not an emotional abuser. He did not make her homeless. He did not cause her to lose her job.

It was this type of shit that got me in this thread to begin with, and I am hardly part of dianne’s “posse”. I don’t even give a shit about whether or not torie assaulted the guy. What I see, and what is pissing me off, is the people who are “defending” torie are slandering her boyfriend for no good reason, and using that slander to justify their “defense” of torie.

Nyctea, I hope I have brought the point home that all we know Marc ever did to torie was kick her out of his apartment. That’s the only thing you have been able to criticize him on since I proved you were dead wrong on the job, the homeless thing, and the emotional abuse. Yet to you, he’s still an asshole. You can’t seem to forgive the one understandable infraction. You see where I am going with this?

237

My god, you just don’t get it do you?

SolGrundy produced a sensible post that demanded your challenge. You refused on the grounds of its “bad” tone so others step in to prove that it was you that started said tone in the first place. The point is that you can’t expect a fucking brown nosing just to get you to pay attention and give us a decent response.

Frankly it has to be said now that if this pitting has just been about how “disgusting and pathetic” we are for coming to the call of a fellow doper then you are an asshat and this is a fucking lame pitting.

238

First of all, it is Diane, not Diana. It’s right there.

Shame on me for thanking someone for an apology. I’ll remember not to do that again. Interestingly enough, Maureen doesn’t “see it my way” or did you fail to notice that?

You are right though, this has turned into nothing but a pissing match. I’m backing out the thread until/unless the topic of the OP resumes, which I hope it does because I really do want to understand the mindset of those who feel the violence is justified.

May the rest of you continue on with your feeding frenzie. :rolleyes:

Binarydrone - I am sure they all thank you for protecting them from the evil that is me.

Later.

239

Just wanted to note that even the people criticizing Diane and others who share similar distaste for that MPSIMS thread are just adding to the “pile-on”/“feeding frenzy”/whatever you want to call it. Face it, we have a talkative group here who more or less like to debate, and some stuff is just going to generate comments.

I guess while I’m here I’ll share the tale of my sister-in-law. She would call my husband and I, crying about how mean and drunk her husband was. After she divorced him, she eventually met a new guy, but after a while made a panicked call to her parents about how he’d abused her, broken a rib and such. Sounds like she’s a victim, doesn’t it? Not if you knew that she abused drugs and alcohol too in her marriage, and gave the vitriol as good as she got it. She once attacked her now-ex-husband with her sharp fingernails, slicing up his back and clawing at his face. Her siblings can all recount stories from her youth where she would turn into a shrieking harpy in arguments, baiting the other person to say worse things to her, until finally she’d strike out by pulling hard on hair or clawing, and then fall back on the “I’m a girl”/“I’m the youngest” defense. With her current boyfriend (who she swore she’d leave after the broken rib), police have been called numerous times to her apartment for disturbing the peace when those two argue, and they even got tossed in the lockup in a jail in another state while on vacation, for the same reason.

So, I don’t see any real excuse for hitting people over breakups, especially when it’s not in “the heat of passion”, and especially if you didn’t love that person any longer anyway. I was also disturbed at an apparent double-standard, as astro and others pointed out; as you can see from my tale of my SIL above, she could do some damage, and even if she couldn’t, she’s still abusive. And yes, smilies don’t necessarily mean “I’m just kidding.” I put them in after happy statements, often.

But what I meant to say to torie’s case is that you cannot have anyone else convince you that you are not inherently unloveable. I suspect the reason you stayed with this guy for so long, especially if you claim he put you down a lot and that you stayed there even when you didn’t love him any longer, is that you felt that way then too. Even if you didn’t love him, you didn’t want him to do the rejecting, right? Cut off all contact with him beyond trying to get your stuff ASAP, assuming there’s any left at your old place. After that, go on with the counseling, and don’t look for anyone to love you for a while, or you can be almost certain you’ll fall back into a similar pattern. You have to love you and to work out how that was messing with your relationship.

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Yeah because my name was on that fucking quote wasn’t it? :rolleyes: Don’t accuse me without proof. Some people do deserve to get their ass beat. It doesn’t make doing it any more right. Both I and nyctea have said that the violence was wrong, I suppose your selective memory forgot to post that little number. We never supported torie for her violent actions, we supported her becuase she asked for our support.

Get that?

Not because of the violence, because she asked for our support.

How do you know this?? You accuse us of making up stories but at least we have torie’s side to make those assumptions. You have not a shred of proof that he was the perfect man. Heck if you think he was not at fault then you accuse torie of being some mentally deranged person for spontaneousally attacking him for no reason. He did something to provoke an attack, that’s how it works in the real world. I don’t get why you have a beef with nyctea and myself.

Since when is getting kicked out of your home not being made homeless Monkey?

How can you turn your back on that so quickly just to go head on in an assault against torie’s character?

Yeah, that’s taking the high ground. Are you gonna pit me for my mistake now?

No, but isn’t it funny how the only person you haven’t berated is someone apologising to the great and wonderful (retch) Diane :rolleyes:

Ok one last time. I’ll even space it out so you can’t miss it.

WE

NEVER

CONDONED

THE

VIOLENCE