that you’re as likely to be forever haunted by the memory of their beauty as forever heartened by it?
Like these old threads, today’s absurd hypothetical* is set in Pangaea, the alternate Earth ruled (with a very light hand) by Pallas Athena and peopled by elves, kappa, werewolves, and other mythical species.** Again you’re on a quest there, though this time no Pangaean is responsible for your woes; it’s an human sorcerer that’s stirring up shit this time.
But nobody cares about that crap. The point is that you’ve gone to Pallas’s representative in the mortal Plane, the Prophet, for help saving the human world from, I don’t know a new ice age or whatnot. The Prophet’s busy with her own shit right now so she can’t help you personally, but she does give you a magic Gatling gun, a sonic screwdriver, and some enchanted kevlar, along with eight stalwart companions to assist you in getting the MacGuffins necessary to turn the solar thermostat all the way back up. Before sending you and your Company off, the Prophet gives you a bit of counsel.
"The last item you need to return your world’s sun to full power is only to be found in the Palace of Aphrodite, inhabited by, obviously, Aphrodite. Hence the name. Oh, and her son Eros is always there too, on account of them both being put on time out by great Pallas for getting o her damn nerves one too many times. Now you need not fear that either will interfere with your quest; they’re naughty, not nefarious. But yet there is a danger. You see, these two godlings are the most beautiful creatures in creation. in the past thousand years or so, about two dozen mortals (including several previous Prophets) have had occasion to see either or both of them face to face. Half of those have reported that the sight of their beauty was so wonderful that, for the rest of their lives, the memory of it was enough to cure any melancholy, to encourage them in the direst danger and to enlighten them in the darkest hour; these were obviously grateful to have had the chance. But the others reported that, after seeing Aphrodite and/or Eros, all other beauty was spoiled for them. No mortal beauty could ever satisfy them; their wives and husbands, their lovers and friends, even their children seemed as ugly as trolls in comparison. They wished they had never gazed about the divine beauty.
Now I myself have never seen either Aphrodite or Eros. I got my own shit going on, plus I’m chicken. My point is that if should be possible to accomplish your quest without looking directly at either one of them, and you may want to consider doing that. Or not. I am not the boss of you."
Anyway, you and yours have arrived at Aphrodite’s Palace and are moments away from deciding whether to go gaze directly at the two godlings. Do you risk it? Why or why not?
Poll in a moment. No desserts today, though.
*Stolen from an old comic book starring Green Lantern and Green Arrow. Or maybe Thor and Iron Man. Possibly Spider-Man and Daredevil. I don’t know, it was 30 years ago and I don’t remember. Shut up.
**But no hobbits. Filthy unpickleable bastards. They should all be fed to deinonychuses.