You Know What We Need? New Saints!

How can we forget St. Opal: Patron of Lists

Saint Zette: Patron of November First?

You know how I said there are patron saints for everything? Man! Do a couple of Google searches just for fun and you find out Saints Margaret of Cortona, Mary Magdalen, and Mary of Egypt all patronize reformed prostitutes.

I really shouldn’t find that as funny as I do, should I?

Are there any patron saints of Pirates?


Catherine of Alexandria
Francis de Sales
Gregory the Great
John Baptist de La Salle

Is it a bad sign when your occupation requires FIVE patron saints?
Teaching isn’t for wimps.

Ayeeee Matey
there be, or would that be thar be…


It’s worse than you think, silenus, one of them – Ursula – got removed from the official calendar in1969.

In looking for a patron saint of computer programmers, of which I used to be one…um…one of which I used to be…Aw to Hell with it!
Anyway, I found two;Saint Isidore of Seville and Saint Expeditus
Saint Expeditus looks a little iffy to me, so I’m going with Saint Isidore de Seville. I wonder if he has a statue, or does one just get a generic saintly looking statue and put it on their dashboard and just call it Saint Isidore? Inquiring infidels want to know.

underlining mine

St. Gaudere : patron saint of grammar ?

Maybe I will regret asking… But is there a patron saint for unreformed prostitutes ? :smiley:

How about a Saint Umbilica for obstetricians?

Saint Hobitch for unreformed prostitutes?

Saint Marinara for Italian chefs?

Saint Gatesia for Microsoft employees? Or would Gatesia be a demon?

You wanna St. Izzy statue Bumba? You got it!

And you know teaching is a rough gig silenus. You got more saints looking out for you than there are for ex-hookers. Unless that’s the OTHER definition of “patronize”. (That’s a good ex-hooker, yes that is!)

Oops. Bad link to the St. Isadore statue. Well, the link is fine as far as it goes, but you can’t actually order one that way. Try this one instead.

Also, there’s this one, but it’s not as good since it has a cow on it. Normally I’m big on cows, but they don’t really reinforce the “computer” idea.

OK, I gotta stop. I followed chattywine’s link back and found out Saint Nicholas is the patron saint of (unreformed) prostitutes. Santa Claus patronizes hookers.

Mr. Lissar is worried that my status will mean more small, fuzzy animals wanting attention in the middle of the night. It is a scary thought.

We could have lieu as Patron Sant Of All Bodily Functions We Don’t Want To Think About. And I think Osgie should be Patron Saint Of People Who Bravely Eat Weird Deep Fried Food (I shared a deep fried twinkie and some oreos with her at the Iowa State Fair).

Thanks chattywine. Hence, I therefore pronounce you St. chattywine patron saint of answers before the questions are asked :stuck_out_tongue:

Another one perhaps St. jdavis : patron saint of hamsters ?

Is there a Saint of Toenail Fungus? If not, can I have it?

That would be kinda cool, in a weird sort of way… :smiley:

I’m not sure I’d want peoples invoking my name every time they feel down in the dumps. Can’t I just be paron saint of Webber grills or, better yet, just a man for all seasonings?

I would think that St. lieu would be the one you called on when you could get any of the others.

That should be: when you couldn’t get any of the others.

*Note to self–when making bad jokes, preview is your friend.

Ah, Saint Kallessa – patron saint of preview.

Try looking at for the patron saints of EVERYTHING. Like those against oversleeping or “twitching”, the patron saint of lost keys, and the patron saint of fear of mice.

Religion is COOL.