So I pop into a CVS to grab a Dr. Pepper and what to my wandering eyes did appear but Valentine’s Day candy.
But what was next to the Valentine’s Day candy?
EASTER CANDY!
Easter Peeps, Cadbury creme eggs, you know Easter candy.
YOU MANIACS! YOU DID IT! GOD DAMN YOU ALL! GOD DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!
The cream eggs were good.
Dammit. Just when my doctor puts me on a strict low-fat, low-sugar, high-fiber diet, Jesus and his horde of evil creeme- and coconut-filled chocolate eggs descends upon me . . . I am doomed . . .
Are you sure those are for next Easter? Because I found some creme eggs in November and I’m pretty sure they’re not for next year.
Cadbury Creme Eggs are the only candy I can eat only once per year. Any more than that and I risk bringing on a diabetes attack of an unimaginable scale… and I’m not even diabetic.
You should try browing crafts stores. In mid-December, our local Michael’s had the collision of Christmas, St. Patrick’s and Easter.
Some crafty people can whip out a holiday whatzit in a few days, but there’s a whole lot that need a couple months to plan and do, and the stores are happy to cater to that.
One of the few holidays I’m glad they jump the gun on. I always loved those malted milk painted eggs. We used to paint our lips with 'em when we were kids.
I rarely do that nowadays. Once or twice a year at most…