You may ask God any three yes-or-no questions and have them answered. What do you ask?

In My Humble Opinion
41
  1. Who are you really? Allen Funt or Ashton Kutcher?
  2. When will I get that pony I endlessly prayed for as a kid?
  3. Got a light? And no, I don’t have a spare cig for you.

Well, since I answered off the title and not the OP, it says “you wasted a questiona and life is unfair” but that’s not true in either part. I like my questions and life is fair to middling.

42

  1. Will I ever publish a best selling novel?

  2. Will I ever be able to give birth to my own babies?

  3. Do you know where the fire extinguisher is so I can put out this burning bush here?

43

Does free will exist?
Does any religion on Earth come close to your philosophy?
Are we the only sentient beings in the Universe?

I think even being confronted with someone I then believed was god would change my entire life. Many here are taking for granted it’d be a Judeo-Christian god, how on Earth would a Shinto god answer, “Does the devil exist as an independent personal entity, not a mental/social construct?”

44

Can I have additional questions?
Would you tell me what to ask next?
[Still waiting.]

45

Why can’t you write or inspire a logical, coherent text that does not include glaring contridictions from page 1 and appears just to be a bunch of stuff selected by primitive peoples that have no relevance to modern life?

If your so vast and unknowable and perfect, why do you care who I sleep with?

Why do you continue to allow the branch of NAMBLA (AKA the catholic church) to continue to destroy lives, cover it up and not pay a price?

46

is there a higher purpose to all this?

want a beer?

can I have gills?

47

Some of you seem to be missing the subtle constraint of the yes/no answer proviso.

Otherwise my first question would be “What would be the answer to any question which would provide me with the greatest benefit that I could achieve by receiving such an answer?”

My follow-up questions would be “What would be the answer to any question which would provide me with the second greatest benefit that I could achieve by receiving such an answer?” and “What would be the answer to any question which would provide me with the third greatest benefit that I could achieve by receiving such an answer?”

48

I will give up my 3 yes/no questions just to get the answer to this one:

What is with all these migraines???

49

  1. Would [classified] be happier if I contacted him?

  2. Am I making decisions in my life based on the correct moral criteria?

  3. Is there any religious group that you want us to hate?

50

I will give up my 3 yes/no questions just to get the answer to this one:

What is with all these migraines???

51
  1. Are you really God?
  2. Really?
  3. You?
52
  1. Is the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything really 42?
  2. If Yes, is the ultimate question written anywhere in this universe?
  3. If yes, am I warm (near)?
53
  1. Can I pray for everyone else to live longer than my enemy, starting today?
  2. Can I create my own tax haven “church” and still get into heaven?
  3. Can I get fries with that?
54
  1. Do you have a creator?
  2. Will I have a conscious existence after I die?
  3. Followup to #2, if yes, will I like it?
55

Are you God?

Can I ask you a question?

Are you sure?

So will there… Oh fuck… :frowning:

56

At least some of us managed to read the title of the thread before masturbating.

57

Yeah, tell me about it. I mean, just look at this guy:

God answers, yes, no and yes in that order.

Now what?

58

Well, God IS online, so we can ask him all these questions and more.

59

That guy understood the OP. He listed three yes/no questions. Then he gave a second set of questions for use if God was giving open answers.

60

That’s only two questions. Did you just give up on life after hearing the answer to your second question?