My title would be Imperator, but I would be addressed as “Your Eminence”.
I always thought “Imperator” had a nice ring to it.
points at Bambi Ahhh! Get out of my head! 
Supreme Goddess and Librarian of the Universe.
I was going to allow my subjects to use SGLU for short, but that’s to easily typoed to SLUG - although none of my subjects would ever consider doing such a thing.
My first thought was “Overlord.” But I think that might create some dissention in the ranks.
Of course those dissenting will be boiled in oil, so maybe the title fits.
I’d like Supreme Lightness of Being. I can be addressed by Your Brilliance.
“Comrade.” Because we shall all be equals in my society.
Although I, of course, will be somewhat “more equal” than anyone else…
Since I imagine I won’t be elected to the post of Supreme Ruler, how about Lord High General.
Mommy.
I wouldn’t need a title. My oppressed subjects would be forbidden to even speak my name, under penalty of death.
>=D mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
A phrase I especially like because of the four consecutive sets of double letters.
Me, though – “Philosopher Queen.”
Naw, you all are approaching this wrong. I’d really mess with the heads of the serfs (i.e., the rest of the population of earth).
I’d be known as “That Asshole”. You would address me as “Hey, Asshole”. If you didn’t address me with enough disdain in your voice, I would have you tortured. If you actually tried to address me in a polite fashion, the penalty would be death. If my vast network of secret spies ever heard you referring to me other than “that asshole” or a similar derogatory term, the penalty would be death.
Yes, that will do nicely. Bwa-ha-ha-ha-haa!!
I like Sire…
Or The Childlike Empress
or
Earth Enchantress
Tempting to go with “Biggus Dickus” and arrest everyone who smirks…
Most High Supreme Emperor and Almighty Immortal God King Emekthian, ruler of all Earth, Sea and Sky, Overlord of all creation, Lord of all the lords, king to all kings, prime minister to all prime ministers, supreme Mugwump and Moff, Khâmpeth Lyanghî, Imbiatwrai S’eskauhro Methámïrineiva, protector of his friends, torturer-by-fecal-cranial-embedding and executioner of his enemies, feared by his slaves and subjects, most gorgeous to hot girls, boner-inducing in gay men, owner of the most supremely long schlong, really cute, master of Super Metroid and Zelda III, haver of the best looking big toe in all the universe, just as smart as Cecil Adams, the final authority about wether a word is misspelled in Inglish, and posessor of the most great power of all eternity.
A friend of mine said that when he became Emperor of Earth, that I could be his MINISTER OF PLEASURE AND PAIN.
Now THAT’S a cool title!
I actually have business cards that read “DeVena, Mistress of Pain”.
History may remember me as DeVena the Fat, but my minions *will * call me w h a t . e v e r . I . w a n t. <stony glare>
“Yes, Mistress” has such a nice ring to it.
Hmmm. I like either what Eve said,
or what Farmwoman said.
Or, both!
I’ll take “The richest man in town!!!”
Admiral of the Ocean Sea
Though my close advisors could call me “Skipper”. If they angered me, I’d beat them with my hat.