:: presses trigger switch ::
:: blows Diomedes into outer space ::
:: leaves small crater + smoking boots ::
Aah. Happy times 
Oh, did I say that I wouldn’t be able to post? Because what I really should have was that I have two exams and a take-home final over today and tomorrow and really shouldn’t be posting at the SDMB.
Don’t worry, I can quit any time I like.
waiting on 4 confirmations still.
Confirmed and ready to go.
CRAP! Still locked out of the off-site board, and I missed the signups for this one…crap crappity crap crap crap!
I already confirmed via PM. But, just to make it official:
CONFIRMED!
Ha! I just realized if brewha has a massive flame, we won’t know if it’s because he’s upset nobody will believe his detective work, or because he’s Disgruntled!
Special one time offer to Hal Briston.
Seeing as I took your place in the Blade Runner Game, do you want in one this one.
If you want it in, let NAF1138 know.
Not sure where we are in sign-ups, but if you need a player I’ll join, and if you’re full and ever need subs, let me know.
I see how it is: detonate and run, eh?
::sniff::
And I already had my first vote all planned out…
rats. Didn’t see this thread before. This is my kind of game, and I trust mtgman.
/in to sub, should it be necessary.
We are full. And subs will be a rarity in this game. If you want to join us in the spoiler thread let me know.
If you want to start the spoiler free forbiden thread here…go for it!
(I feel weird starting a thread to watch a thread I started)
Hmmm…my first instinct was “Naaa, thanks for the offer, but I don’t want to snipe someone else’s spot”.
Upon further consideration, however, if I don’t do something about this Mafia jones, I’m gonna pop. Add in to this the fact that with the holidays approaching, I’m one of the three schleps in my department that didn’t take any time off. I need things like this to get the workday to pass!
CatInASuit I thank you very much for this, and accept your offer. NAF, consider me in.
Thanks!
The Board outage? That was Cat saying good-bye. 
Your in, I will repost the player list and send you your PM shortly.
New and improved player list:
1.storyteller0910
2.HazelNutCoffee
3.Freudian Slit
4.brewha
5.MHaye
6.ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies
7.sachertorte
8.Hawkeyeop
9.ShadowFacts
10.Santo Rugger
11. Pleonast
12. One And Only Wanderers
13. Rysto
14. Hal Briston
15. faithfool
16. zuma
17. Hockey Monkey
18. Kat
19. Diomedes
Ok, so Hal, if you would confirm that you got your PM please.
Also, faithfool, Mhaye, & Kat.
I think it is close enough to 100% confirmed that we can probably start the Night.
I will let MtgMan get us rolling with color posts and a public copy of the vanilla PM.
It’s a five hundred foot drop. Sheer cliffs surround the abandoned Monastery where the CEO decided to come for a “teambuilder.” Everyone had to be brought here, deep in a mountain range you don’t know the name of, by helicopter. It seems the ancient order of monks who built this site had an elaborate rope and pully system to bring up people and supplies. All that remains of them are some iron platforms jutting out from the cliffside, like a short pier for a ship which sails the skies instead of the seas.
Most of you aren’t even sure where in the world you are. The CEO didn’t put a timeline on this venture, just that you were “going as individuals and coming back as a team.” You do know it’s as cold as the grave and the pale winter sunlight doesn’t seem to warm anything, least of all yourselves. Still, you do have some modern conveniences. The monk’s cloisters have been retrofitted with heaters and comfortable beds. There are toilets and good kitchen facilities. Whoever began the refit of this monastery came up with the clever idea of building a cabinet with an insulated front door, but which was open to the cold of the mountain air in the back. Refrigeration on the cheap.
A couple of you decided to look around and see if you could identify the monastic order which had built this place. You examined the friezes and artwork, as well as the sculpture, and architecture. It looks like a little bit of everything really. Mostly ancient Asian, with graceful roofs and swooping curves. There is a small stone henge in a courtyard with a large stone altar in the center. A huge green-tinged bell is in the front of the monastery with a two foot thick tree trunk capped with a metal dragon’s head suspended from ancient iron chains which would be used to ring the bell. There are statues of beasts and carvings of things which you’re pretty sure have never existed outside an artist’s fantasy. Some of them are doing things you’re pretty sure you won’t tell the kids about when you get back home. Some of them in 3D.
In the center of the largest building is a large pool of water, heated to a reasonably pleasant temperature by some unknown means. A couple of you have speculated this must be a mostly dormant volcano and a lava tube comes up near this peak. A couple others speculated the hot springs were here first and the monastery was built around them to take advantage of both the defensible position and the natural water source.
High in the top of the tallest tower is a many-windowed room and the amount of straw and bird poop on the floor would indicate it was a falconry or homing pigeon room. The views of the surrounding mountains are spectacular. The sharply gabled roof of the main building a few dozen feet below the main window is frightening. One room was renovated into a stereotypical martial arts studio, complete with rack upon rack of oriental weaponry. You’re pretty sure this wasn’t original and in fact some of you were starting to really wonder about what a strange amalgram of periods and cultures this place was when it happened.
Around nine in the morning on your first Day there, the strangest thing happened. The sun was framed between two mountains in the distance and rays of light shone through the stone henge, throwing a strange pattern into the main entryway of the monastery. All of you just sort of stopped where you were and as one your eyes glazed over.
Your eyes were filled with a vision of a single figure, dressed in monk’s robes, sitting in a lotus position. The man knows he is about to die, and he is at peace. He is the last of his brothers, there will be no more. The monk raises his eyes and stares straight into the rising sun. Vague features, with no clear ethnicity, relax, showing nothing but age and a world weariness unlike anything you’ve ever felt. This man’s time is done, as is his task. The secrets he guarded no longer need to be kept. The time when supersitious factions would rain destruction down on his kind out of fear of the unknown has passed. The world has moved on. Now he goes to join his brothers and you feel his spirit slip away as he slowly exhales his last breath.
As quickly as it had come, the vision ends.
Everyone starts talking at once, but the conversation rapidly dies off as it becomes clear everyone knows EXACTLY what just happened. Never before have you ever experienced anything like that, nor have any of your co-workers. A moving, and quite disturbing, experience. Something about this place seems to have captured the last moments of the man’s soul and is replaying it when the conditions are right. As freaky as that is, at least the scene it captured was a peaceful one.
You all demand an explination from the CEO. He tells you he actually knew about the visions. It seems an investor had decided to reclaim this monastery and turn it into a high-end vacation spot for the fabulously wealthy. The work crews had updated several aspects of the monastery but had eventually been driven away by the visions. Being in someone else’s head as they died, even a peaceful death, is enough to put a serious damper on productivity of a work crew. Luckily, your CEO explains, you’re here for a teambuilder, not remodeling work. He sees the shared visions as symbolic of what he’s trying to do, which is to get everyone sharing his vision of where the company should go. The fact the developer was desperate to get some money back out of his failed venture and rented the premises for a retreat at well below market prices didn’t hurt either. You begin to see why the stock price has dropped forty percent since the current CEO took office last year.
After the explination of the vision your CEO announces it is time to start the teambuilder. He has a wonderful, innovative way of breaking the ice. Each person will tell their name and one thing about themselves. A belief, an experience, something. To help us get to know each other. The collective groan accompanying this announcement was met with a cheery “See! You’re acting like a team already.”
The exercise took less time than you had feared, and in short order there was a lovely list of names and items noted on the whiteboard(the CEO brought one, along with ten shades of green markers, he doesn’t believe in red or black). The resulting list was the entirely predictable mixture of the mundane, the “sexed up” mundane, the slightly shocking, the probable lies, and those few who shared entirely Too Much Information.
ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies - I was a trombone soloist in college.
storyteller0910 - I’ve travelled with royalty in torn T-shirt and jeans.
Hockey Monkey - I graduated from college over 9 years after enrolling, and I was nearly expelled twice.
zuma - I have walked along the shore of the Bay of Pigs.
Freudian Slit - I believe farts are really funny. People only pretend to not think they are.
Diomedes - While Jay Leno was doing a stand-up show I attended, he recognized me as someone who had previously seen him perform and spoken briefly with him.
sachertorte - I’ve climbed to the top chamber of Cheops.
Rysto - I wear a size 7 shoe.
Santo Rugger - One of my high school classmates was killed in the attack on the USS Stark.
faithfool - I believe the Honda Element is a good-looking car.
ShadowFacts - I enjoy practicing the cello
MHaye - I believe that zombies are inherently funny.
Kat - I played piano with Sly Stone in a Holiday Inn restaurant.
Pleonast - I had my last cat, Clawdia, professionally preserved and she sits in my bedroom.
One And Only Wanderers - I once had sex in front of the Washington Monument.
brewha - I am scared of moths.
HazelNutCoffee - I own an authentic 1920s lady’s flapper outfit.
Hawkeyeop - I have performed an exorcism.
Hal Briston - I have a near phobia of octopi.
This part of the event was over and a break for lunch was taken. Afterwards everyone was invited to wander around and get to know each other and meet back in the meeting room at 4PM.
4PM comes and everyone returns to the room. The whiteboard has a new message on it, in red…
Letter of Intent
To Whom it May Concern,
This note represents formal intent by a group of us to form a joint venture, with one primary goal. Revenge. Revenge for every wasted moment in pointless meetings. Revenge for frustrated career goals. Revenge for beaurocratic nonsense stealing our lives by issuing us pagers when we don’t need them. Revenge for changing our health plans every year to save the company a couple bucks and to hell with what it does to our relationships with our doctors. Revenge for matching our 401(k) contributions in nearly worthless company stock. Revenge for every broken promise, for every unannounced layoff, for every person who was “outsourced.” For training budget cuts and executive bonuses. For all these reasons and more, you are going to die. None of you will leave here alive.
Thanks!
Disgruntled Associates L. L. P.
A few of the braver souls began to chuckle. Then they noticed the message was circled and labeled “Do Not Erase.” This was serious.
Panic set in.
And a voice rose above the clamor. “Follow me everyone,” said the CEO. He led the group to the iron pier, jutting out above the huge drop. He climbed up on the platform and began to speak. He laid it all on the line. The most open and honest assessment of corporate life and culture you’ve ever heard. How quarter-driven results stifled long term plans for success and how short-term thinkers had a lock on the board membership. He related times and places he had attempted to make positive change, only to be shot down by risk averse legal counsel, or penny pinching board members. He told how he had brought up many of the same ideas and objections you’ve had. He talked about being on calls all weekend, numerous times, fighting for many of the things you were convinced no one cared about.
"And now that brings us to our situation here. Whoever ‘Disgruntled Associates L. L. P.’ are, I hope you understand now the circumstances which created the system you have decided to lash out against. I don’t think you’ll make the impression you intend to. I think you’ll prove the risk-averse attorneys right, and make the penny pinchers pinch even tighter. Still, I’m going on the assumption that nothing I’ve said has changed your minds, or could. I’m the enemy to you, no matter how hard I’ve tried not to be. So now I speak to the loyal associates.
This doesn’t have to be this way. Disgruntled Assosciates can be defeated with the number one tool everyone should hone in our lives. Communication. Draw them out of their shells, engage them in the group. Find out what makes them tick, and defuse the timebomb. Teamwork was the goal of this retreat, and teamwork can still prevail. Ceaseless industry, fearless investigation, and unfettered thought. These attributes can end this threat."
You can’t believe it. You’ve never heard anything like this, from anyone, ever. This man, if he is only a man, is a real leader. You begin to see that you’re not alone, that you’ve been heard. That all the way up to the CEO there are people just like you, fighting to restore sanity to the business world. The senior members of the group have tears in the corners of their eyes. You can tell how long they’ve waited to hear something like this, and all their hope, want, and need are coming together and binding up in this man. This leader.
That’s why they reacted so badly when he jumped.
Everyone rushed to the cliff edge. A parachute made of golden cloth, and emblazoned with the company logo drifted slowly to the ground. And it could have been a trick of the evening wind as the last of the sun’s light fell behind the mountains, but you could have sworn you heard a final “GO TEEEAAAAMMMM!”
Night fell.
Enjoy,
Steven
Ok, so you’re dead. It isn’t that bad. Well, the fingernails on the blackboard and the smell of brimstone suck, but you get used to it. What you need to do now is make sure your death wasn’t in vain. Because of the special nature of the place and time you were killed, you have a limited influence on the poor schlubs still shuffling around in their mortal coils. You can get one last poke in at the bandwagon which led to your lynch, if you like. Personal attacks, crude and offensive messages are frowned upon. Remember you may well be sharing cubicles with some of these people in the levels below, and I’m not talking about the basement.
Even more importantly, if you met your death through foul play instead of honest mistakes, here’s your chance for a little revenge yourself. In your last moments you learned something. Here’s your chance to pass that knowledge on. It may have been something meaningless to you at the moment(you had more important things on your mind) but you remember it with perfect clarity. If only it made sense!
The Rules for Death Scenes
First person point of view only. “I felt the fingers tighten around my pinkie. Panic raced through my body and down my trouser leg to pool on the ground.”
Keep it somewhat realistic. Feel free to invent new scenery which are place-appropriate. No roller coasters or lightning bolts from the sky. Bonus points for using details sketched out in the opening color posts.
This was a one-on-one struggle. It took place either in late evening or in the night sometime. The scenery and setting may be used to improvise weapons. No Apache gunships.
If your death was a Night kill you will recieve a piece of info to work into your death scene. Try not to change the wording of it too much because it may or may not correlate to a piece of public information about another player. It will NOT be a verbaitm copy of a player’s trait, public or not. Whatever characteristic is chosen to be revealed through your death will have already been passed through a layer of obfusication by the Mods and the team on the spoiler boards. If you change it much more it may become indecipherable and thus useless in helping find your killer.
Death scenes must be PM’ed to the Moderators(NAF1138 and Mtgman). Due to PM length limitations multiple PMs will be accepted. Please clearly label them Part 1 of X, part 2 of X, etc. so we dont’ get them out of order and we know we have it all. Scenes may NOT be posted to the thread by deceased players.
URLs and passwords for the spoiler boards will be withheld until a death scene is submitted or the window for said submission has passed.
Be creative, be entertaining. This will be your last chance to entertain the other players. Think of the ways you’ve wanted to kill annoying co-workers, or read Pit threads for inspiration.
Enjoy,
Steven