“I was just so proud to show off my big old Jim McConaughey — and his gift.”
Matthew McConaughey’s mother, newly widowed, on her insistence that her husband’s body be removed fully uncovered.
Why would you need to steal it ? I’m sure plenty of people would be more than happy to donate Giant Death Golem sperm for the glory of our lord Satan. Or just to be able to tell their mates, in between devilwhip cracks, that they totally boned a succubus once and she was *hella *hot. Cock-meltingly literally.
When a recipe calls for *stolen *mortal sperm, you steal it. None of this half-assed graciously donated seed.
And you wonder why your cooking sucks.
Next thread: “Your husband and your boyfriend die mid coitus: Do you pull them apart before calling 911?”
What if one is dead and the other is just passed out?
Take the wallets and run.
Why would I finish him off if he’s already finished?
Happy ending!
clap clap clap clap.
well… you know…my husband would want to go out with a bang…
I would like to arrive in the next life with fresh come on me, all other things being equal.
This thread would have been so much better with a “need answer fast”.
Yes. He would’ve wanted it that way.
sobs
I dunno. The last time one of my lovers died mid-coitus, his cold, dead eyes put me right out of the mood. So I’d have to put a pillow over his face and pray to God that no one walked in on us.
Since I truly hope to die in the arms of a lusty peasant girl, she has my express permission to carry on to her hearts content knowing that I am deeply grateful for the gift she’s given me.
We’d have to sign all of the forms though to make sure that she isn’t accused of rape like in Shakes’ thread
I usually come before he does, so the chances are that if he’s at the mid-point, I’m taken care of. However, if I’m not, no, I don’t finish. I get the corpse off as fast as possible. Aside from the fact that I don’t actually need him for the orgasm part, he’s there for all the other stuff, I think finishing might be violating the Jewish law about having sex if you have “corpse impurity,” which happens if you have touched a corpse, and have not showered AND let an entire day pass. I’d really need to ask a rabbi.
If you do, please report back on his answer. 
Seconded
I might send a link to this thread to my cousin, who is a rabbi, and a “she,” but beyond that, I don’t think I’ll be pursuing this with any other rabbi of my acquaintance. I suppose I could anonymously post to one of those “Ask the Rabbi” things regarding whether having your partner die during coitus means you have had sex during a period of corpse impurity.
Other stuff?