Yep, little bits o’ wisdom. What do you share with yourself? Me? I always say, never do in private what you would be embarassed by if it was told to the public.
Also, the Cooper-ism: Every day, once a day, give yourself a present.
“Plenty of time for sleeping in the grave!”
Said mostly in my younger days, to friends who wanted to go to bed before I was done partying.
“I’m growing older, but not up.”
Jimmy Buffett
Don’t carry grudges. They’re really heavy, and they’ll tire you out.
It’s always darkest just before the piano falls on you.
Never buy a car with a can of StopLeak in the glove box.
If you’re planning to go to the casino, with a given amount of money you’re willing to lose, you can save time by mailing a check.
Live hard, live fast, die young, and leave a good-lookin’ corpse.
It’s illegal only if they catch you.
If possible, always take your dumps on company time.
“Reefer will get you through times of no money better than money will get you times of no reefer.”
Tell the truth to everyone but your girlfriend, the cops, and the IRS.
Don’t put salt into beer.
Slightly modified from the Cerebus comic book:
“I believe it is easier to see during the day than it is at night.”
“And not much else besides?”
“And not much else besides.”
If I ever get a coat of arms, that’ll be in Latin on a scroll.
My philosophy has long been:
“Nothing is ever easy.”
From one Mr. Dave Foley, in his “letter to the guy I clotheslined while you drove by on your bike”…
“SOMETIMES, WE BRING HEARTACHE UPON OURSELVES”
Honest to God…somehow that ends up in almost every conversation about my life.
I have to go with Ferrous on the
“There’s time for sleeping when I’m dead”
also:
If life gives you lemons say, “Thanks life, I like lemons”.
Procrastination is like masturbation, you’re only screwing yourself.
“Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur.” - Anything in Latin sounds profound.
My mottos are
“Better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it”
and
“Just because you can doesn’t mean you should”.
A hobby of mine is fracturing old sayings; it’s funny when people who don’t know me very well hear me doing this - I’ve done it so long I’ve forgotten that my clichés aren’t quite normal.
I live my life by the following line: “Except the worse but hope for the best.”
Expect the worse, that is.
With Knowledge, Fear Disappears.
or maybe
Lick Me
which would look better on a crest?
Mines similar to that one:
“Always expect the worse; so when the worse doesn’t happen, your pleasantly surprized.”
My personal favorite:
“This too shall pass”
“never underestimate your subconscious ability to get into a dysfunctional relationship”
“If you’re single, don’t panic”
If life gives you lemons, squirt 'em in people’s eyes.
It’s someone’s sig on this board but:
If you’re gonna walk on thin ice, you might as well dance!
Yep, and I’ll plunge into that gaping hole screaming all the way folks.
what is right is not always funny; what is funny is not always right.
and
if you don’t have anything nice to wear, don’t wear anything at all.
i like to fracture old sayings too, featherlou. and hey, that rhymed. ooh.
Don’t press; let it happen: Ties right in with “this too shall pass”. Applies to good times and tough ones. Accept and learn from what’s tossed my way, good and hard. Both are gifts.
People do the best they can.: Very few people aim to be total shits. They aren’t being deliberately annoying just blindly muddling along–same as me.
Will this MATTER–to me or anyone else–in 1 year, 5 years, 20 years? Somehow I routinely expend 80% of my energy on crap that frankly doesn’t matter a damn, to me or anyone else. A reality check because life is so much shorter and fragile than supposed. It’s squandering life.
When in doubt, laugh: (at oneself) Can be rude, desperate or uncouth. But it’s usually a healing reality check.
Honor anger. Tricky, slick, dangerous weapon but still needed. This one’s hellishly tough. Cutting through ego and “muddle” in service of purpose is a pure pisser.
Sigh.
Anyone lookin’ to me for wisdom is suckin’ wind.
Veb