And I guess I should finish up with the fact that it should be “anyway” rather than “anyways”. Long live proper grammar!
I get to say it! I get to say it!
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH!!!
duh
Should be “Duh!” 
I think you are wrong about the chocolate. There are some types of chocolate bars that are so good, if it were possible for my tounge to get a ‘stiffy’ it would.
Having said that I have just consumed an entire packet of Jaffa’s which I stole from the stash in my boss’s office. It’s not evil but it is slightly naughty.
leechbabe, I’ll give you decadent. Not for nothing does a friend of mine make a ‘chocolate orgasm’ cake. But not sinful. I’m with the OP on that. It gives me the irrits the way people say that stuff.
A similar thing that annoys me is “the missus won’t let me do X”, spoken as if oooh aren’t I being such a naughty lad for watching some shoot’em-up DVDs and drinking a few beers. You know something? I don’t believe you.
I think you can do whatever you like, but you want to pretend you’re being wicked, so you blame the poor innocent girlfriend, who no doubt actually said “have a nice night with the boys, dear” as she settled in for a pleasant evening with a box of choccies and the BBC Pride & Prejudice video.
Anbd bloodytoe - i believe you said that deliberately in response to Sofa King. Eye agreee their two menie puppys.
Oh you know what? I probably repressed this. Out of guilt.
Around five years ago I had a three-wheeled baby-jogger type stroller which had a warning label on it that said, NOT FOR USE WITH IN-LINE SKATES. (The old kind, I guess they’d have been okay.)
Ha. I not only ripped that sticker off, I rollerbladed! Yes, actual in-line skates! With the baby in the thing! (As a plus it had a hand brake so I didn’t need to learn how to stop. It was kinda like having a walker. I think.)
Wonder what the statute of limitations is on that? I think I’m safe. Probably going to hell though. I believe the baby in question’s arms did twitch.
It’s one thing thinking you’re wicked through eating chocolate, but that pales into insignificance beside all the low-fat low-calorie diet desserts made solely out of air, cellulose, and whipped goatspunk that are marketted under brand names of “Really Wicked”, “Deliciously Devilish”, “Bursting with Boston Strangler Badness”, “Charlie Manson with a Cherry On Top”… Because if there’s one thing more evil than having a proper dessert it must be a foul diet dessert.
On the other hand, I quite enjoy getting phone calls and text messages from people I don’t even know telling me how drunk and sluttish they are. Fascinating.
You are being whooshed by “grammar Nazi”?
No, you’re being whooshed by bloodytoe’s original “They’re to many puppys and kittens anyways.”
And see? It was a deliberate misspelling because he/she was responding to a joke, and then you corrected his/her spelling…and…and…yeah. I hate explaining whooshes.
Of course now that I think about it there is the opposite end of the scale where if people were to eat dead babys arms they would try to play it down with " Yeah, it was the only thing that was fresh on the menu, the waiter said it had died of pain-free natural causes and you got a free bottle of wine with it. And anyway I was getting so bored with veal and puppy steaks."
Is it just me or does this thread just keep on giving? It’s the written equivalent of a bargain. 2 & 1/2 pittings for the price of one click. These are crazy, crazy bargains people.
OMFG! I just thought of another thing, people who tell you a dull story but they key it up to be all wacky and zany beforehand ( cat people note " Yeah so I was cooking some food and I had to answer the phone,when I came back my son was feeding the cat spaghetti with a fork!!, he is one zany zany guy, the cat is so wacky because he was eatin it too!").
When these toasters talk to you you can actually see the exclamation marks at the end of their sentences, the tone of their voice just shoves it into your head and you’re thinking " Why am I seeing an exclamation mark here? So you burned the toast, so fucking what, I mean it was in the toaster right and not in the sink or something."
OMFG! I am now also pitting people who even use the words wacky and or zany. Somebody stop me before there is no-one else to pit.
Hey YOU! Yeah you in the corner over there, get outta here before I give you a pitting. I mean it I will pit you.
I like drunken cellphone conversations. Actually I like other people’s stupid friends ringing them up when they’re baked off their nut. Their end always sounds a little like:
‘Hello?..Ooookay…Yes, I love you too…No really…’
It’s fun to ask for the phone and then talk to them as their conscience.
‘hello, Alisa? put down the drink, go home and tell your mother you love her. This is your conscience speaking. …yes, I love you too…’
heh