Your Patron Saint Designation by . . . Swimming Riddles

Swimmin’, when I opened this thread, I was just gonna read, and not give you more work to do…But it seems like the butter is really sizzling on your Roll!

So, I beseech thee, Swiddles, help me up my future bone value!


The ride is short and the thrills are cheap- Men and rollercoasters. - - -Courtesy of Wally, that Signifying Guy.

HI swim. I want to be a patron saint.

If my postage qualifies, I am a willing patron saint of just about anything. Except graphing calculators. Or Gap commercials.


Christopher Robin Hood - he steals from the rich and gives to the Pooh.

I also moonlight as the Patron Saint Of The Grammatically Challanged. :frowning:


You say “cheesy” like that’s a BAD thing.

Oops, sorry. I know a chick named Nirine, and I assumed…Tell you what, you can be the patron saint of staplers, too, OK?


“I go on guilt trips a couple of time a year. Mom books them for me.” A custom made Wally .sig!

My iguana's sick.
He's all floppy. Could he have
Reptile dysfunction?
                  -Chef Troy, Haiku Master

Oh SwimmingRiddles,
I sing your praises.
Your talent at names,
Simply amazes.

Me too, please. I could use a new .sig.


Only you can prevent solipsism.

God, this thread won’t die.

OK, Bless us, St. TopazAntares: Patron Saint of Quintuplet Posts. And Patron Saint of Chinese Food.

Bless us, St. wevets: Patron Saint of Non-Catholics Lookin’ To Be Excommunicated For The Bragging Rights.

Bless us, St. Irishman: Patron Saint of Kickass Zippo Lighters.

Bless us, St. elelle: Patron Saint of Buttery Similies

Bless us, St. Osip: Patron Saint of Exit Signs. (think about it, how would you find your way out of a dark room?)

Bless us, St. Quadzilla: Patron Saint of Postage. And those handy erasers you put on the end of pencils.


“I go on guilt trips a couple of time a year. Mom books them for me.” A custom made Wally .sig!

My iguana's sick.
He's all floppy. Could he have
Reptile dysfunction?
                  -Chef Troy, Haiku Master

Thank you! And sorry for so many posts… it wasn’t working for me and I got a little impatient…


Bargain not with the Darkness: in time it will take us all.
Exerpted from The Book of Nod

St. TopazAntares: Patron Saint of Quintuplet Posts. And Patron Saint of Chinese Food.
Courtesy of SwimmingRiddles

:::beatific simile:::

You Go, Girrrrlll!

I have been known to claim to be a saint–or a devil. It might be interesting to see what Riddles makes of me.

you can poke around my useless website to get some ideas if you want (& I apologise in advance to any Scadians, it’s been a season for arguing with myself)
http://foolsguinea.intercosmos.com


Yes, I am an egomaniac; why do you ask?
…You didn’t ask?
Ah, but I knew you were dying to!
…You weren’t?

Hell, since I am an ineffective sinner, I might as be an incompetant Saint. Can I be the Patron Saint of Sarcasm?


That what does not kill me, postpones the inevitable.

You know the only thing better than sipping an eponymous cocktail with a beatific smile on one’s face? Sipping said cocktail knowing one is fully freakin’ justified in one’s beatific smile, because, yes, one is drunk, but more importantly, one is a bona fide, canonized-by-SwimmingRiddles saint. One thus humbly entreats Ms. Riddles for the aforementioned honor.


“Are you frightened of snakes?”
“Only when they dress like werewolves.”
-Preacher

SwimmingRiddles bestowed thusly:

??? ROFLMAO I don’t know where that came from, it’s so from left field, but I’m laughing anyway. Kudos!

Can a goddess be made a saint? I do hope so. Just don’t go for the obvious is all I ask.


Your Official Cat Goddess since 10/20/99.

We’ve got a blind date with destiny…and it looks like she’s ordered the lobster.

Me too !
Me too !

:smiley:

Oh, most holy SwimmingRiddles, I, your most humble servant, humbly beg the divine boon of thy divine canonization.

Amen.

(That wasn’t laying it on too thick, was it?)


“It’s a sunny little doomed planet, inhabited by a number of frisky little doomed animals.”

Does this mean that Swiddles is :::gasp::: now the POPE? I must say, your Holiness, you look much better than JP2.

Irishman: I bought me a snappy new leopard print Zippo that matches my purse, and was gleefully playing with fire when I was attempting to compose your canonization. Hence your name. You might want to talk to Vestal Blue, he’s the Patron of All Things Hot and Firey. Might want to make sure the boarders are drawn.

Bless us, St. Suo Na: Patron Saint of Originally Composed Poetry For the Purpose of Blatantly Kissing Some Riddle Arse. Also the Patron Saint of Rasberry Tea and Those Little Strawberry Candies That Have That Really Fun Goo Inside. (wow, apparently composing poetry in my honor works!)

Bless us, St. Foolsguinea: Patron Saint of Those Who Need More Quotes in Thier Quotes Page, But Whose Website Is Visually Interesting. Also Patron Saint of Cheetos.

Bless us, St. Shirley: Patron Saint of Ineffective Sinners. And Patron Saint of Dopers with Kickass Usernames.

Bless us, St. Kat: Patron Saint of Humility. (was that obvious?)

Bless us, St. Nothingman: Patron Saint of Cherry Coke. (oooh, LUCKY!)

Bless us, St. Cowboy Greg: Patron Saint of Laying it on Too Thick. However, because The Patron Saint of Patron Saints (moi) enjoys having it layed on thick (wait a minute…), I also bestow upon you the coveted role of Patron Saint of Cowboy Hats. Congratulations.


“I go on guilt trips a couple of time a year. Mom books them for me.” A custom made Wally .sig!

My iguana's sick.
He's all floppy. Could he have
Reptile dysfunction?
                  -Chef Troy, Haiku Master

Me!

Bless us, St. Matt: Patron Saint of Dopers Who Live Geographically Closest to Swiddles. (As far as I know…Burlingtonian here!) Also patron saint of Gravy Fries.