YAAAAAAY!
JohnT, as soon as you get me a map to Smurf Village, I’m on it! 
But but but…
Not having read why are we killing the second most-iconic 20th-century blonde, and since I didn’t think of taxis (in my village there is only one; right now I’m in a much bigger place where it’s plumb impossible to get one at night), I’d come with the hubby. I mean, I can have a hypothetical hubby, right?
I didn’t think of taxis either. Memphis has them, but they congregate at the airport, the Greyhound station (which is about a mile from the airport) and downtown. If you live in, say, Whitehaven or Frayser or even Midtown, calling for a cab at 2 in the morning is pointless.
According to the duty roster, WhyNot is in charge of meting out hypothetical spouses, so you will have to ask her if you want one.
Who’s the most iconic 20th-century blonde? I can think of at least two possibilities: Marilyn Monroe and Princess Diana.
MM of course.
WhyNot, can I use The Bestest Boyfriend as “hypothetical spouse”? He’s big and does “looming” well, would come in handy for rescue situations so long as they didn’t take place in the morning (he’s definitely Not a Morning Person).
Absolutely. I will henceforth imagine him as Olaf, who would definitely be someone I’d want on my side of a rescue situation.
(I cannot explain why the Smurfs in general or Smurfette in particular have always made me feel smurfy. Uh, smashy.)
Have you younger siblings, cousins, nieces, or nephews who insisted on watching the show all the time?
My youngest sister is ten years my junior. Between her and our two oldest nieces (2 and 3 years younger than Baby Sis), the 15-year-old babysitting Skald watched enough episodes of Smurfs, He-Man, She-Ra, and a fourth sickly-sweet cartoon whose name I can’t remember that I too get all stabby at the mention of them. Well, the first three. Obviously the fourth one doesn’t elicit the reaction.
Eh, they’re all part of one evil Hive Mind. You know this.
Please? Christmas is coming! :eager:
YES!
This. Cops would have been called the second I saw what even appeared to be an abduction.
My brother works at a domestic violence shelter, and its location is a closely guarded secret for a reason.
I’m unmarried, but if I were, I would encourage my wife to go, and I would insist on going with her. I’ve had more than my fair share of exposure to abusive relationships, and when the abused person is finally ready to get out of it, it’s important to be there to provide the support so that person doesn’t just fall back into the cycle.
Yes, the cops should be called, but they won’t be able to give her the support she needs to actually finally leave. If she can get out of the house without incident, then it may be best to jump on that opportunity and have the cops present when she’s picking up her stuff. That’s why my hypothetical wife would need to be there.
The reason I’d insist on being there is both to help show some solidarity and, considering the OP states the guy is a big guy, there’s no way I’d send my hypothetical wife into a situation like that. I’m considerably bigger and stronger than most guys myself, and typically the sorts of guys that would be abusive aren’t going to start something with someone their size or bigger.
Nitpick: I think the OP actually says that the abusive husband is bigger than Amy, which doesn’t necessarily mean he’s a big guy.
Agreed to all of this.
This is what I’d do, too - meet the police at the house so we can support Amy for whatever she needs, and the police can handle the dangerous parts. I’ve heard the police here say more than once that they WANT people to call them for these situations - they’re trained and ready to handle these situations, and the last thing they want is me and my husband getting hurt trying to help Amy.
Amy doesn’t want the police called? Too bad. A crime has been committed - they’re getting called.
If the cops were called an a report was taken, I would support my wife in helping her.
I am willing to do this ONCE and only ONCE. If she goes back to him and calls back with the same sob story, I will not provide my support.
Of course, I imagine my hypothetical wife to be her own person and she may very well decide to help her against my wishes anyway. There’s not really much I can do about that.
The cab would be good, but a person who has been physically battered by a partner has also been emotionally battered. Having someone who invests him/herself personally goes a long way toward regaining self respect.
My answer: for a co-worker / friend of either of us, both of us will go.
This. If Amy can call my wife, she can also call 911. And she should. Immediately.
Amy calling us is problematic. Obviously I’m not going to let my wife go alone, but if I go, it is likely that I could see things that could make me a potential witness. If I’m a potential witness, then I shouldn’t also act as an attorney in the case…and Amy needs to be in front of a Judge getting a protective order in the morning, and depending on the severity of her injuries possibly talking to the DA as well. If there is another resource available for the immediate situation, I think it would likely be better for Amy in the long run to have me represent her.
Then again, reasoning with a recently traumatized victim is sometimes difficult. It it has to be, we’ll go get Amy. I can probably call in a favor to get her represented at a price she can afford if I have to…
My wife also would have intervened already. So for Skald’s hypothetical late night phone call…
Been there done that (more then once). Cops get the call, so does the battered woman shelter. I know the local authorities well enough to know that they do their jobs well. If there are kids, as much as I distrust child services, they also get a call.
My wife and I go to the scene and transport Amy (and her kids) to the shelter. Yes, I know its location. We may stay at the shelter with her for emotional support, but we are not headshrinkers, and that is one of the things she needs right now.
In my community, she can not drop the charges sense she did not levy them. There is a real possibility that she will go back to him. I will help people out of this kind of situation ONCE, not twice, and certainly not thrice! I will spend my energy on someone that I can actually help.
If Amy does go back, then SHE is on her own. If there are kids, I will watch out for them. I will even spy on Mr ugly to keep these kid out of this abusive situation. I will report domestic violence if I see it.
I can not understand staying with an abuser. I think that folks that do are insane. I choose to not hang out with crazy.
I’m surprised at the amount of people that say they would call the cops for Amy. IMHO, if Amy isn’t willing to call the cops herself, then Amy isn’t ready for help.
I get that leaving an abusive relationship is hard, but the very first step one must take towards healing in this situation, is calling the damn cops and NOT dropping the damn charges after you’ve done so.
I acknowledge kids makes this a rather grey area.
I’m a married woman, and I’d suggest that either we both go, or I go. Couple of reasons:
- Amy might feel safer with a female along given that a male has just brutalized her
- If they got pulled over en route to a hotel or shelter or whatever, and the police saw male + battered female, they might arrest first and ask questions later
- While I trust my husband, I do NOT know Amy all that well (at all?), and male alone with fragile and possibly vulnerable female might arouse feelings and actions in one or both parties that could range anywhere from uncomfortable to life-altering.
Having been raised by parents who liked to fight this way, I would never be friends with such a flake. If my boyfriend was friends with a flake like Amy, I would insist that he not go, and call the cops instead. He’d probably go anyway (because he’s loyal like that), and we’d get into a bracing (but non-violent) row once he got home.
I am … bothered … that you think the victims of domestic violence are necessarily “flakes.”