So recently my daughter has her first steady boyfriend, nice kid. Black kid. Looks kind of like a combination of Phil LaMar and Sidney Poitier, but a little lighter since his grandmother was a German girl who married an American GI. A nice coincidence since my daughter’s grandmother was a Korean girl who married a GI. As papers are stamped by clerks, thus are our seeds sown.
The pudgy kid down the block seems to have had a crush on her, though, and didn’t take it too well. I had “Fuck Niggers” painted on the street and on the wall of the church next door. These were all promptly painted out.
In such a small neighborhood it’s easy to know who’s doing what. But of course we are met with **“Don’t you know I’m a Mama Tiger when my babies are threatened. **You can’t come and accuse them without proof!” She exhilarates in a swirl of virtue and abandon.
Ok, I won’t force the issue. You needn’t take this opportunity to turn your kid’s life in a positive direction. We’ll just stay quicker on the draw of our cell phone camera, and your kid be tossed into the jaws of the criminal justice system. I’d rather not see that, since I know that stupid white kids emerge from its other end as confirmed Nazis.
Stock answer whenever any idiot (which includes my children and the girls on the team I coach) gives me that line: “Do I look like a court of law?” I can form and act upon unreasonable suspicions if I choose (I don’t; usually they’re extraordinarily reasonable).
People are only innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. In the court of D_Odds, you are all guilty until I deign otherwise.
Wait, so did his plan work? I mean, pudgy kid. I’m sure in his little mind he thought this would some how make your daughter see the err of her ways and run to his open and tubby arms.
I mean, if a pudgy kid vandalizing things with racial slurs can’t get a date, I don’t know if there’s hope for the rest of us.
I “had” as in “experienced,” not “contracted to have done” Although in the case of your orgasms, there’s probably no difference, you silly bastard
I am considering “having” as in “contracting to have done” “Robert P- is a sexually frustrated racist masturbator” flown as a banner from a single-engined airplane.
There was one of these in the neighbohood I grew up in. Shorltly after we moved into neighbohood, mom found oldest boy, 18 mos. old at the time wandering in street. Took him home. Nobody answered door. Door unlocked, “mom” on phone and pissed at interuption.
Two more kids born later. Oldest is still living in parents basement, age 41, but at least is gainfully employed as an automotive mechanic.
Next oldest son is a guest at the Colorado Hotel and License Plate Factory in Canyon City.
Daughter OD’d at 19, leaving two kids for grandparents to raise.
I was once arrested after I broke up a fight between the the convict and another neighborhodd kid. The convict was using a baseball bat, which I took away from him. “mom” claimed it was my bat, and I was attacking her precious. Charges got dropped when it came to light that convict’s name was burned into bat, and was obviously old work.
Oh yeah, the kid who was on the recieving end of the bat is also in the state pen… Attempted murder of one of my HS classmates. I guess maybe it wasn’t such a great neighborhood.
I too imagined the OP seated with a beret-wearing artist with a moustache, giving the commission: “I want something that expresses racism and obscenity”.
I’ve actually been pitted twice, once because of a misunderstanding and once because I was apparently an elitist asshole for approving of a mother encouraging her children to get a good education to get a good job. But this time I’m innocent, I promise! My son is neither pudgy nor still living at home!
Robert P. is nothing of the sort! He was one of the greatest centers ever to play in the NBA! If you try to mess with him, then Larry B., Kevin M. and a lot of other Boston C’s are going to be very angry.
