Okay, I’m going to be up front and tell you guys that this is probably a pretty lame rant. Please, be kind… (I know, I know, this is the BBQ Pit. Oh well. I have to tell my story.)
It has been raining off and on for days here in the fair Black Swamp region of Ohio. Since we are not only in a drained swamp, but also situated directly on top of a vein of limestone that begins three feet below the soil, our free-range poultry farm area is deluged with swampy, shit-smelling water. This morning, I went out to do the feed-and-water routine, slipping through acres of smeary muck to feed the almost desperately grateful chickens, ducks, geese, turkeys, guineas, and pheasants. The pheasants’ cage is partially flooded, and we can’t move it until the mud dissipates later in the year. Luckily, their shelter is not in the flood zone, but nevertheless I had to trudge through a foot of water to get to their feed bowl.
Our own personal manure-scented swamp is not expected to improve until May when it recedes, or (possibly tomorrow) the next time it freezes over into a brown skating rink. This, of course, brings a new set of troubles, possibly with its own rant. But back to my story… I know, for the animals, it is worse, as at least part of their area puts them up to their little avian knees in brown muck. But for me, it’s a serious matter not only of being covered in nasty swamp mud at least once a day this time of year, but the attendant problem of the extra load or two of laundry… each time my SO or I complete this chore, an entire outfit of clothing goes down to the basement, so incredibly mucky and contaminated it shouldn’t even be worn any longer, and probably shouldn’t be allowed near other laundry, but I really don’t know where else to put it.
Yeucchh.
To top it all off, little ggurl (11 years old and wont to use whole rolls of toilet paper at a time, despite constant reminders) plugged up the toilet while I was outside working. When we got indoors after a frightened plea for help from the front door, toilet water was cascading all over the bathroom while little ggurl futilely churned the extra-heavy duty plunger around in the bowl. I made matters worse by trying (and failing) to plunge properly and flushed, causing yet another shower of poopy water onto the floor.
An entire hour of myself and my daughter tag team disinfecting the bathroom (and feeling totally eww-ey) ensued. There is no amount of globs of hand sanitizer and squirts of disinfectant spray that could make any of us feel clean at this point. Today has been a day that began and ended with me feeling as if sewage-infested water is chasing me, splashing on my clothes, flooding my very existence! Acckkkk! Get it off! Get it off!!!
Ick, yuck, ewwww, arrrrrrggggghhhhh!!!
And now, for another hot shower.