… I am again considering suicide as an option. Seriously, I’ve never had much to live for. Life is a big pathetic joke at my expence for those around me and, whenever I do bother to have a go at those who put me down, I just get put down further.
It’s so hard for me to explain what life is like; the utter lonliness, complete detachment despite a desperate desire for belonging. But what’s harder is that no one cares, no one gives a damn where I’m comming from.
The replies this post are getting are anywhere from people trying to help, to people making jokes, and telling him to go through with it.
When you see people on line crying for help how does it make you feel?
Do you take them seriously? Do you think they are just looking for attention?
How do you respond?
I once had an internet friend say he was going to kill himself, then log off. I tried to call his house but wasn’t succesful, but didn’t call the police. When he logged on the next day and said he was just joking, I was furious. Our friendship ended shortly after and I haven’t had contact with him since.
If I were to see something like that online (I never have), yes, I would take them seriously.
It’s a possibility. But I’m not willing to take the risk that they’re serious.
I’d find out as much info as possible (on a message board, I’d think the mods would have access to information like that) and contact my local cops, and let them contact the cops wherever the person lived and go from there.
Well, I wouldn’t worry about calling the cops just yet - it sounds like you have a few months. In those few months I suggest trying to talk to them lots, in particular trying to persuade how they have so much to live for, how upset other people would be if they went through with it, and generally trying to increase their self-esteem. If I cared about the person, that’s what I’d do, anyway. You should be able to detect after a short while whether they’re serious or not, I would have thought.
If someone made a suicide post on a message board, I don’t think I’d respond because they’d already be inundated by responses of all kinds. Mine wouldn’t help, and if it were a fake threat I’d just end up getting pissed off at that person if I had gotten involved. I think I would just pray that whatever it is they need in their life–be it attention, success, beauty, fame–is delivered to them when they need it most and expect it least.
I’ve had a couple of friends make suicide threats. One told me and another friend online that she was downing a popular OTC pain medication in excessive quantities for the purpose of killing herself. She had just broken up with a terribly [emotionally, not physically] abusive girlfriend, was in a bad way with her parents and was just in a real emotional mess; she had the willpower and conviction to go through with it if she was serious, although I’ll never truly know how seriously she wanted to end her life. Regardless, I called 911, and they busted in and got her and got the meds out of her system one way or another, then put her in a loony bin for a few weeks, where friends could theoretically bring stuff to her but the asshat at the front desk wouldn’t let me give her a book or a soccer ball (kind of an inside thing; the soccer ball really would’ve brightened her up, I think). I didn’t raise a fit, because I realized that I was lucky that my friend was alive.
Another close friend (let’s call him Friend B) of mine had a big crush later that year on aforementioned suicidal friend (we’ll call her Friend A). Friend A was not at all attracted to B, but wanted to go out with him so that she could play with his feelings and destroy him emotionally, as some kind of cosmic payback to her ex (she told me so). B was the sort of individual who was prone to bouts of depression, and I begged and pleaded with A not to go out with B because he would be ruined, and I begged and pleaded with B not to make the move on her because she wanted to rip his heart out. B, blinded by crush, asked A out, A worked her magic, and in about a month I was counseling B out of suicide.
Oh, and Friend A paid me back for the whole saving-her-life thing by stealing my girlfriend while I was in another state, and using my relationship with said GF against her, daring said GF not to get back together with me after they broke up. I had introduced them several months before.
When people post things like this (and I’ve seen a few), I always hope that they have actual people in the real world they can talk to, whether they’re serious, joking, or trolling. They all need a serious talk with somebody who’ll be honest with them and try to help their problems. And, yes, I think they all have problems.
The last time I was party to this situation, it was someone online who had just gotten a cell phone text message that could have been interpreted as a suicide note. I told her to call the police, which turned out to be the best course of action.
If I knew precisely who was posting like that, I would definitely call the police. Whether they’re really suicidal, being an attention whore, or just being painfully emo, a stint in a mental hospital could set them straight.
I did it. Once. In 2004 while in the grips of one of the nastiest psychotic episodes I’ve ever had to live through. TubaDiva called my house at 11:00 PM & woke up my (then) wife who in fairly short order made it impossible for me to hurt myself or someone else in the process of trying. I assure you, it was not a cry for help and I don’t consider myself an attention whore. IIRC it was a well-meant and heartfelt farewell.
The poster in the OP needs help. Either with depression or with understanding how such posts can make others feel. Probably both is my guess.
It sounds like a cry for help to me. Perhaps that poster has no one else to reach out to. It’s unfortunate that other board sounds like such an unsupportive place.
That said, the poster revealed their intent and obvious struggle with depression and needs help of some sort. It doesn’t sound like he intends to act immediately, so calling the police at this stage may be unnecessary. I would direct him to Samaritans.
Samaritans is available 24 hours a day to provide confidential emotional support for people who are experiencing feelings of distress or despair, including those which may lead to suicide.
I tried to help a person like this who posted on a mb. I ended up feeling pretty used and abused. He just wanted attention, and didn’t want any advice I had to give. The one and only time I spoke with him on the phone, he was telling me that he was suicidal and yet was ordering a pizza and otherwise acting normal.
I advised him to go to the hospital several times, but of course, he did not want to do that. It made me feel helpless, and I didn’t really know what to do.
I ended up reporting his post to the moderators of the mb and I was informed that he had done this to several other people.
So, I would leave it alone if I saw something like that again. If I was actually suicidal, I don’t think I’d be posting on a mb about it. But, that’s just me.
Do at least contact a moderator again. Even though you wouldn’t be posting on a message board, there are others who have posted on mb’s while in the process of taking their own lives.
I know that some of you may not feel strong enough to handle a situation like that and no one really wants to. We all get scared and feel helpless. But always, always take these theats seriously.
There will often be the idiot who does it for a joke. She or he is foolish – not you. And there are those who seem to be very emotionally immature and it may look like they are just doing it for attention because they are fourteen years old and take five asperin over some boy. But even that is a sign that she needs some counselling and help with dealing with growing up.
Those who seem to threaten it on a regular basis may actually be considering it on a regular basis. So just because someone threatened ten times before and didn’t go through with it doesn’t mean that she or he isn’t serious.
Suicide can be a very impulsive thing. If you can help someone make it for a few hours, you may save a life.
If the person has depression, she or he may not have the least idea that that’s what it is. That’s how much it screws up judgment. He may just think he is worthless and hopeless. It can be sometimes a temporary thing; medication and counselling may turn it around.
Please never take a chance when the person might really be needing help. Not everyone has family and friends to turn to.