Resolved: Delaware Does not Exist

In My Humble Opinion
1

I don’t get it. I never meet anyone who admits to being from Delaware. I would like to knock it off of my “states not visited” list, but it always seems to be out of the way, wherever I happen to be (as if the whole state were some mapmaker’s afterthought.) Nothing newsworthy ever happens there. When’s the last time Delaware showed up on the front page of the paper for anything?

I am reluctantly drawn to the conclusion that Delaware does not exist. It is an elaborate hoax concocted by a coterie of “Delaware corporations” seeking to avoid governmental regulation. (What better way than to incorporate in a non-state?)

Can anyone disprove my hypothesis?

2

I liken people who claim to have been to Delaware to those who claim to have been kidnapped by aliens. Sure, it could have happened, but it all likelyhood it didn’t.

3

I have been to Delaware and I can attest to its somewhat tenouous existence.

Northern Delaware might better be called “suburban Philadelphia.” Southern Delaware might better not be called at all.

Value judgments aside, yes, Virginia, there is a Delaware.

4

Yeah kunilou, now tell us your abduction story. :rolleyes:

5

AHEM.

I live in Delaware.

It’s flat and boring, but it’s here.

In Delaware the chickens outnumber people 60 to one. They get very angry when their home state is questioned.

So… if you hear a pecking at the door, you might want to break out the Shake&Bake…

6

Such as Visa or Mastercard?

Chances are the company that issued it is based (at least leagally) in Delaware. Wilmington, DE, most likely.

It’s the credit card capital due to favorable corporate laws and the fact that they don’t limit the interest that can be charged “customers.”

So does that prove Delaware actually exists?
I mean it could just be some giant kind of Mail Boxes Etc.-type post office front, I suppose.

OK, how’s this…
I lived there as a child.
My mom lives there now.
I have the Toll receipts to prove it.

7

Thomas Capano and Anne Marie Fahey -
the subjects of both a 20/20 feature
and an A&E City Confidential.
(Now THAT’s validation for you!)
.
.
.
.
OK, I’m having trouble coming up with another example, so you may have something there…

Most people know DE (if they do ata all) as a toll on I-95 between Philadelphia and DC.

8

I’ve been to Delaware, though I must admit, had it not been for the sign that said “Welcome to Delaware” I would have thought I was still in Jersey.

9

Hmmm…

How do we know the so-called Delaware tollbooth isn’t just some scam by the state of Pennsylvania to extract more money from interstate travelers?

And…

erm…Who?

wireless, face it. Your childhood was a lie. You grew up on the eastern shore of Maryland (if indeed that truly exists…)

10

Tom Capano was a very rich, powerful lawyer in Wilmington. One of the wealthiest families in the state. He killed the scheduling secretary of the governor, Anne Marie Fahey. Big trial, big scandal, ect. He was found guilty.

Hmm… proof that DE exists.

Let’s see. Why in the world would I admit living here if it didn’t. (Okay, not very good. Must try again.)

Chickens! A lot of the world’s chickens are from DE. We also are a major supplier of scrapple.

Du Pont started here. And we have tax-free shopping.

Question: Are you doubting that the land itself exists, or that the state exists?

11

And andygirl, I do not fear your phantom army of imaginary chickens. Everybody knows chickens come from Arkansas. :rolleyes:

Look, if there’s something in your past you want to hide, fine. Go ahead and tell people this fake story about growing up in Delaware. Hell, tell them you grew up in Narnia. They’ll never check up on it. Just don’t try to convince us Dopers. We know better…

12

As far as I’m concerned, the entire state is the invention of some clever corporate lawyer. Probably in-house counsel for DuPont. I’ll bet the state doesn’t even appear on maps prior to 1920.

And for all I know, andygirl, you are some pin-striped Wall Street lawyer yourself, perpetuating the mythical creation of your corporate masters. How do you sleep at night?

13

I don’t sleep at night. I steal small babies from their cribs and force them to undergo hypnotic sleep therapy after which they will automatically hail Tom Carper as a God and worship Senators Roth and Biden, even though one looks like he hacked out a hunk of carpet, colored it with magic marker, and stapled it to his head and the other failed at his mission to become President, making him the fallen angel of our precious little cult.

These children then grow up to be the next generation of “Delawareans”, convinced that their idyllic childhoods consisted of shopping and chicken farming!

Of course Delaware is on the maps. We changed them all.

I stomp on small puppies! I eat Cthulhu sandwiches! I am the Illuminati!

I am DELAWARE! FEAR ME!

Listen to the voice that is Delaware… closer now, closer… spoke- does not exist. Only the chickens. We like chickens…

There is no conspiracy. Move along now, nothing to see here.

14

I too, have first hand experience with Delaware. Admittedly, I go there mostly to shop, but I DO go there, on a reasonably regular basis. So there.

15

All I know about the alleged “existence” of Delaware is that little stretch of I-95 I avoid past Elkton, MD, on my way up to Philly.

How can a place that doesn’t exist justify charging travellers $2 for the right to drive in it?

16

Random bit of trivia:

Fight Club is set in Delaware.

No, really. Listen to the DVD commentary track (or read the book). It’s never mentioned or shown during the actual movie, but the filmmakers inserted a few subtle references to the state so anyone who knew what they were looking for could tell it’s on purpose.

Not sure this is much of an answer for the OP, given the revelation at the end of the story…

17

I’ve been through two parts of DE, southern and northern.

For the former, it was when I was returning from Ocean City, MD, and decided the traffic back to DC was too heavy on US 50. We decided to veer off into Delaware. Bad move. The state highways there were gridlocked because of all the others returning from OC that had the same thought.

For the latter, I’ve gone through it many times on my way to visit in-laws in New England. Besides the toll for the priviledge of driving 15-20 minutes in their state (NH is the same way), they’re also real sticklers for the speed limit. On my first ride through DE to Philly, the driver of our car got ticketed for going 65 in a 55.

18

My father got a speeding ticket once while going through Delaware.

This surprised me at the time since the distance one has to travel from the (admittedly very cool) dual-suspention bridge to the other end of the state is hardly enough time to get a station wagon full of kids up to the old 55 limit, let alone to surpass it.

If Delaware does not exist, my dad wants his money back…

Yer pal,
Satan

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19

Their motto: The First State. BFD! Their ancestors got their homework done early, then sent it to Philadelphia, which is just across the border. I betcha the Founding Fathers from DE got wedgies and swirlies from all the other delegates. :D:D

20

Hey! My grandfather lives in Delaware! And if it didn’t exist, would my grandmother have divorced him to avoid moving there?