Ok, the background
I have this friend at work, we’ve known each other for a year, the first time we spoke was when it was about a guy she liked and she got rejected by and she spoke non stop for about 40 minutes about it, she has lots of platonic male friends and never talks to me about who she’s interested in, however I do sometimes with her. She constantly feels my elbow, and tries to link arms with me. She even sang my name, out loud, repeatedly.
The Present
Today, I had like a kind of epiphony, I think she is manipulating me for her own ends, and has done since day one. Let me lay it down to you.
For the past 6 months she’s been calling me retarded, or a moron whenever I raise an objection to something, or if we argue, she’ll use those words to stop anymore objections raised by myself. She never uses these words with any other friends, just me. And it’s not like it’s even a lighthearted comment, she says it loudly and provocatively to get a rise out of me. And it fucking hurts too.
We always had to do things she wanted to do, let’s say I didn’t want to go out to a party on a friday after work for instance, I’d set my mind to it, she will then ask and ask and ask repeatedly, it’s gotten so bad now that I have to lie to her (which she still sees through, I now use it as a kind of hint) to do something I’ve planned.
Even the most mundane suggestions I make about anything, she immediately gives an opposite view, she always has to be right.
Everything I do at work is now seen through her, what I mean by that is that I’m totally isolated from everyone else, now, although I’ve done some of that by choice, it’s gotten to a point where I don’t even fit in anymore, and I was always a little weird.
She constantly complains about her life and her ambitions and has a sense of superiority over everyone else, but her sense of superiority is projected on to me constantly.
I mentioned to her that I gained a VISA to Australia for a couple of months, and then said that if I liked it there, I’d stay forever. Well, almost immediately, she went nuts and talked about how it’s impossible for me to do that and I’d have to come back etc, what I’m getting at is this, whenever I talk about plans or goals I have, they’re immediately shot down and ignored or whatever, there’s absolutely no encouragement whatsoever.
She always seems to be nicer and friendlier to other people, not to say she isn’t with me, but she’s always complaining about something, or going off the deep end.
And I’m not even talking about the constant emails, txts and phone calls I used to get from her, even though this has quietened down in the last few months.
I’m getting really strong signals inside telling me I’m being manipulated, should I trust my instinct?
After all this, I really hate her guts, but I was worried about posting this because I don’t want to seem like I’m overreacting, I worry alot and I just can’t seem to make heads or tails about what’s going on with her, over the past months I just seem to be getting more isolated, more unhappy angrier and emotional, now it’s spilling over into other areas and I’m afraid of that.