Walking up the basement stairs, I just stopped. Hmmm. How do we do this? Left or right leg first? Does it matter? :smack: Reboot brain. Find: c:\system files\walking\stairs\up Ah-much better. Finish climbing stairs. Look at the parrot with, “So what’s your problem?” expression. Fetch beer and retire to my office wondering WTF just happened. 
My worst dumb spelling experiences have come while playing Boggle, where I’ll often come at a common word from the wrong mental place, and speculate that it might be a word for the wrong reasons… the two I clearly remember are SHOE (I was wondering if it was an archaic spelling of “show”, and if I should write it down just in case) and READ (I was mentally pronouncing it to myself as two syllables… re-ad)
I couldn’t come up with what color an orange is. :smack:
Sitting at a red light, see the light for those turning left change to green and proceded straight through the intersection. Didn’t realize it till I looked in my rearview mirror and saw the lights for traffic going straight still red and the big U-Haul truck that was behind me hadn’t moved. Luckily no one was turning left from the opposite direction.
The “g” is not silent, it’s just pronunced as if it were a “y”, and after the “n”. In Italian, “gn” sounds like “ny” - “grew-nya-lay”. Maybe you didn’t notice that sound because you aren’t used to hearing it.
I forget what word I’m thinking of all the time. Different words.
My most bizarre (and embarrassing!) brain fart occured last night. It was a typical Yankees vs. Red Sox argument. I’m a Yankee fan. So as my Red Sox friend was going on and on about the Yanks’ upset loss in the ALCS, I shot back:
“Yeah? Well, too bad A-Rod had to cheat to win Game 6!”
Alex Rodriguez is a Yankee. :smack:
Adam
I frequently see a word and wonder, “who the hell came up with such a stupid word? It doesn’t even make sense!” Then, I can’t place the word the next time I see it because I’ve already told myself it didn’t make sense.
I usually have to spell check “people”
I spell my name wrong all the name. I’m so used to others doing it that I forget myself.
Sometimes, while driving - and having to pee at the same time, I have to fight really hard to keep myself from shutting the car off (while it’s still moving). It’s much worse when I’m close to home. For some reason, my brain thinks I’ll get to the bathroom faster if I destroy my engine 2 blocks from home.
I keep forgetting how to enter orders at work. I’ve been entering them the same way for 3 years now but I still forget.
I keep forgetting if I should file by first name or last name (the sad thing is that I used to be a file clerk)
My sister did the drive around the pump thing - 6 times! She had just passed her driving test, didn’t even have the license yet. She had never driven a car with the gas tank on the driver’s side. She just kept going around and around and around. I was laughing so hard I couldn’t even tell her what she was doing wrong.
I once forgot to put the gas nozzle in the tank before pumping. Gasoline is the only thing I’ve ever found which will remove the smell of donuts and coffee from a Dunkin Donuts uniform.
I forgot to eat yesterday. That has never happened to me before. I had breakfast and lunch but I forgot to eat anything the rest of the day. I don’t usually eat breakfast until 10:00. I couldn’t figure out why I felt like I was going to pass out this morning.
All I’m saying in this thread is never actively think about the act of driving while you are driving.
My thought process while driving (and this has happened more than once):
“Wow, I’m bored. humming aimless tune in my head Isn’t it weird how I automatically know how to drive? Like I don’t even have to think about it? Sort of like breathing? Oooh, oh, now I need to gear up. thinking about gearing down Wait, do I push down the clutch and then change gears? Or do I do it at the same time? What gear am I in? Where’s fourth gear? What’s that grinding sound? Oh crap!”
:smack:
I work in a supermarket. Several years ago I was operating a cash register. My customer had, among other things, a bunch of bananas. I put them on the scanner/scale and my mind went completely blank. I didn’t know how much per pound they were, could not remember the code number for them and could not think of what kind of fruit they were. I stood there for what seemed like hours trying to make my brain work. Finally my customer asked me what was wrong and I had to confess. I ended up asking her what they were, just about the time my brain finally kicked in. It is amusing now, but I was surely embarrassed.
I am glad to read of others in awkward situations because of momentary mental lapses.
Last week, I blanked on how to get to my math class. Seems not too bad: I’m a freshman, it’s still fairly early in the year, it was 9 in the morning.
Only: it’s a really, really small campus. With all of four buildings, total, with classrooms in them. To get to my math class, I walk out of my dorm, turn left, go down a tiny hill, turn left, into the building, up the stairs, and I’m there. It takes about two minutes, and I do it three times a week. But instead, I walked out the door of my dorm, and stood there stupidly, thinking, “Math. Wha…?”
Also, I once completely and totally forgot one of my tae kwon do patterns. While trying to teach it to a white-belt. I was already a black belt by that point, it was the first pattern I’d learned, and I’d been doing it an average of ten times a week, every single week - for seven years.
:smack: :smack: :smack:
me: Can you bring the … thing?
dad: The Thing?
me: The twirly thing. Goes around really, really fast and makes holes in wood.
dad: You mean a drill?
:smack:
I remember sitting at my desk, fumbling around with some scissors, talking on the phone, when the line goes dead. I hang up and try re-dialing, wait a while, repeat… no dice.
It took me five minutes to realize I had absent-mindedly cut the curly handset cord on the phone for absolutely no reason.
Thinking I was ragging on my sister saying “Everybody I know is having baby girls. We need to get some Y chromosomes into the family gene pool! Hurry up and have a boy!” as she sat there with my newly born godson on her knee. I have no idea what happened to my brain. Afterwards I was really freaked. Glad to see that I’m not the only one who has moments of confusion.
I (more often than I’d like to admit) forget how to breathe. Or rather, I’ll think about breathing, or someone will mention breathing, and my Conscious Breathing 2.0 hijacks Unconscious Breathing 1.0. Then Labored Breathing 2.5 hits, and I end up all out of breath before managing to uninstall Conscious Breathing 2.0 so Unconscious Breathing 1.0 can reboot.
I’d like to claim it’s part of my OCD, but I think it’s really just because I’m weird.
This happens every once in a while at random, when I’ll be trying to remember some name or word. I know I know the word, and I can almost grasp it, but not quite, and my mind keeps churning out a similar word that isn’t the one I want.
Once I went to visit my aunt with my mother, and my cousin was there as well. He’s older than me, I’ve literally known him my whole life. And yet, I could not for the life of me remember his name. It’s not even a weird name. I just kept saying to myself, “Gregory? Nah that can’t be it. Greg…it’s not Gregory! What is it…Gregory?” At which point I’m just praying that I have no reason to use his name.
Later I remembered–It’s Jeremy. My brain just wouldn’t spit it out.
I was typing up a report a couple of weeks ago at work, and for some reason my auto spellchecker underlined “does” in red. As in, “I’m not sure what she does for a living.”
I was flummoxed. Then I was sure that spellcheck was right, and I had been using a non-word for my entire life. I finally had to get up and ask my supe if “does” was truly a word… she stared blankly at me and said that, yes, does is indeed a word.
It still looks wrong to me, even though I’ve checked it in Webster’s and I know it’s a word, because I’ve been using it since the second grade! Why does it look so glaringly wrong all of a sudden?
Scary - **Greywolf73’s ** post made me think of the same exact thing. I have to work very, very desperately to distract myself from thinking about breathing, or else I have to think about it, in order to do it. If that makes any sense. And all the while, I’m hearing the joke in my head about the blonde getting her hair cut.
I was going to quote the posts that made me laugh really hard but there are just to damn many.
I also do stupid stuff like this. I frequently forget how to spell my last name and I was doing a crossword the other day and could not for the life of me figure out what the hell “being” meant.
I have also been known to ask for “paper on a roll…you know, like toilet paper but bigger”
Another constant brain fart is when reading a thread or anything for that matter, if a word is frequently used I will begin to think it is misspelled. I was reading something about chocolate and about 1/4 of the way through, I started thinking “God that has to be misspelled. It just looks so…wrong.”
Moments like these are the reason words like thingamagick, *whatchamacallit * and *that-thingy * were invented.
