This thread consists solely of punch lines to jokes.

Got it? No setup, just the punchlines. Like this:

“Rectum? Damn near killed him!”

“Crunt”

“Fried rice, you Gleek plick.”

“No thanks, dad. My butt’s still a little sore.”

“Wait a minute, if that’s not your hair, who’s is it?”

How that elephant got into my pajamas, I’ll never know.

“It was then he saw her false eye lying in the ash tray”.

so then the manager turns around and says “It’s a knick-knack, Patty Whack; give the frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”

Well, we needed the eggs.

“Your face look Zachary like your ass.”

“Why the long face?”

A nun falling down the stairs

“What’s this? Some kinda joke?”

Do you think I really wanted a 12 inch pianist?

A lot better than pork, isn’t it?

“You’re drunk, Paw. Go home.”

To get to the other side

“You don’t think I asked for a 12-inch Bic, do ya?”

A stick.

“A fuck for a duck, a duck for a fuck and fifteen bucks for a fucked-up duck.”

“I think not,” he said, and vanished.