Nicely done.
15 months since my last cigarette today.
I ended up in a halfway house and do A.A. I’ve posted quite a bit about it. I can hunt up the threads if anyone is interested.
It is not a daily issue, however I do think about being a recovering alkie pretty much every day. If I don’t think about it I will forget how fucking nightmarish my life was. And then I will end up drinking.
I don’t attend many mettings these days, some but not as many as I probably should. I do help other alkies when I can. However if I start getting squirrelly it is off to a meeting.
Speaking of which, Atomic Mama, if you want to talk and are willing to listen to my advice, PM me and I’ll give you a call.
Life has been a little rough in the past year. Some amazing things happened. I married my beautiful wife. However there has been a lot of stress, a bunch of stuff too long to post right now. Yet with all the stress I didn’t drink and never felt the urge and that is an amazing thing.
I need to change somethings in my life, mainly financial stuff. We got hit with a bunch of emergencies (that weren’t of our making) and it caused a lot if stress. But we are going to get through it.
We are going on a cruise in two weeks, which is going to be awesome. I need a vacation. And I have my wife, who means the world to me, a house full if pets, friends and family who love me and a job I enjoy. So life is good.
But if I drink I’d lose it all within a month. So I do that simplest thing that is so fucking hard to do, if you are an alkie like me, which is not pick up a drink. And if I can not.pick up a drink, all will be well.
And the amazing thing is, if you happen to have a problem, is that you can do it as well. Go to a meeeting, talk to some folks. Admit that your method of staying sober doesn’t work and then have the courage to do what those who have sobriety suggest. If you do that you have a good chance of getting and staying sober.
Slee
Congratulations. Keep on keepin’ on.
One day sober here. Been doing that for over 17 years.
Congratulations! People that face their problems like this…and change…show a kind of strength that I always find impressive.
Some AAs I know would say that resets your sobriety date. They’re nuts. Know one guy who freaked like that because somebody slipped him a roofie at a party after he had been a good boy for a couple years, but he’s nuts. You meet some nuts in our club.
The meetings can help. And you have us. I stopped going to meetings when I got sick of listening to people talk about booze and drugs. Except for special occasions, like my Two Year a couple weeks ago (yay me). And I couldn’t go to daytime meetings so I didn’t spend an hour a day with a particular gorgeous redhead who could be talking about anything for all I cared. But I have the SDMB, and on the internet everybody can be a gorgeous redhead (on the internet I look like Benedict Cumberbatch) who wants to hear about your problems and offer help from their own experience.
23 here, it can be done. You can do it.
Support all who are fighting dependency and addictions.
I went through a phase also after my divorce but it was a phase years ago. I snapped out of it like a clear breath of cool water. Everybody has their poison.
A day late, but no less encouraged by your post.
Well done!
If you haven’t been on a cruise before, they are wonderful - we just got off one. I spent hours every day in the spa - not getting spa services, but they had a series of steam rooms, saunas, showers and heated recliners that was awesome. Lots to eat, plenty to do - or its a great place to hang out with a book and nothing to do.
But alcohol is omnipresent. They walk around the pool with it, they offer tastings, there are PLENTY of bars on the ship, its there for dinner…Most lines have meetings, if you feel the need to take advantage of one. And from what I’ve heard, they are well attended by people in recovery who understand that cruises and vacations can lead to a poor decision.
Enjoy your vacation.
I have met several people who puzzle me. I don’t understand them at all.
They admit they have an addiction problem and say they want help. But in the next breath they make a joke about it like the joke you made above.
Please excuse me if I am mistaken that you were making a joke. But if you were, I encourage you to attend a meeting and speak with someone or just speak with someone who is willing to discuss it with you and offer you some help.
The reason is that if part of you truly wants to escape addiction, it is a real good idea to talk with other people. They want to help you and it is a lot easier to escape with the help of others than it is alone.
I don’t think I could have ever escaped the Hell I was in without the help of others. I can’t imagine ever having done it if I was all alone.
Good luck to you.
Yay you Slee! Good work.
Just out of curiosity, are there any lines who offer cruises with no alcohol? I would doubt the over all appeal of such a thing, but you never know.
Thanks for the advice on meetings. I know about those. In any case, being around booze doesn’t bother me. Hell, my wife will have a bottle in the fridge from time to time. The deal is, if I feel in any way that it is a problem, it gets tossed in the trash.
How I found out that cruises had meetings was a bit funny. My parents went on a cruise. When they came back I went over to their house. My Mom was telling me about the trip when she brought up the fact that there was this guy, Bill W, who apparently was on every cruise they went on and apparently had a lot of friends.
My Mom started going on about how on every cruise they saw signs for this Bill W. fellow and neither my Mom nor my Dad could figure out how they ended up on the same cruise with him all the time.
At which point I burst out laughing. My parents looked at me oddly. I then explained that the ‘Friends’ of Bill W. were the alkies and it was sign for an A.A. meeting.
Charlie Wayne, Fear Itself is referencing a rather famous A.A. slogan, One Day At A Time (ODAAT) (unless there is a whoosh I am missing). The idea, and newbies in the program hear this alot, is that when you are getting sober, don’t worry about tomorrow, just take it one day at a time. Fear Itself has 17 years and he got those 17 years one day at a time. (By the way, congrats on 17 years!)
Since people tend to be wrecks when they walk into A.A., all of lifes problems can be overwhelming and also the idea of never drinking again can be overwhelming as well. So the slogan. Instead of worrying about next year, or next month, or even next week, just take it one day at a time. Just be sober today, worry about tomorrow tomorrow. It is damned good advice.
Slee
Congratulations, Slee!
I’ve had the same conversation.
My sister is good around alcohol as well - in fact, this summer she hosted a very nice martini party - at which she drank tonic with a twist. I thought it was very odd to go to a martini party at the home of the sister I spent family week at rehab for - but I’m very happy she is that secure and healthy now.
Sober here for 33 years. I dont go to meetings any more, but at first I attended at least four times a week. I also stayed at a halfway house for about six months, until I had to leave to work out of town. I had to leave most of my friends behind when I quit because most of them were drinkers, surprise, surprise. Slowly I was able to make new friends, mostly outside AA, and put my life back on the right track. I quit going to meetings about 10 years after stopping because I kept hearing the same whining day after day about how difficult things were and why they kept falling off the wagon. It wasnt easy for me at first either, but if you slog through it stubbornly it becomes a habit. Remember, the problems you had were mostly your own making due to your addiction, and avoiding those will give you the strength to deal with the few that the peckerheads you meet will dish upon you. You must keep sober on your own! Even though you have AA friends, its up to you to ask for help AND follow their advice. To stay sober is YOUR decision in the end. I now am within a year of retirement with a pension, I am married to a supportive wife (non-AA), we have nine cats, a house with 105 acres and the usual status cars, quads, snow blowers (I live in Ontario) and a carpenter work shop. Had I continued to drink, Id have a grave, maybe. I think I made the right choice.
I wasn’t making a joke. That’s how I work my program. I don’t have the strength to quit drinking forever. But I don’t need to drink today. And that has worked for 17 years. But what works for me may not work for you. One thing I learned when I was going to meetings, was don’t work the other guy’s program.
Well, I certainly must apologize to you. I had never heard that kind of remark before and I was certain that you were just joking.
However, I’m very happy that I was wrong and I congratulate you on your sobriety. Whatever works for you is just great and I’m glad that you found something that does work for you.
Keep on keeping on!
That’s a great way of looking at it IMO.
I have successfully applied this to overeating in the past. But I need to do it again. :o Starting today.
Indeed, when I hit a year, I said to myself ‘I don’t have a year of sobriety, I have 365 days’.
Congradulations Slee, you know what comes after 10, right?