I’ve seen several threads about the best threads on the dope, or the best posts on the Dope, but often what I most enjoy on the Dope is a short but incredibly sharp and incisive post – not the sort of thing that will compete with “Horror of Blimps” but still, a great pleasure to find. So I’m creating this thread so I can post some of my faves as I find them, and as they occur to me, and others can post theirs.
I’ll start with a nice, snarky line by Amazon Floozy Goddess:
As wolf in second hand clothing pointed out:
It was originally posted as a quote from a child, but “You eat stupid food for breakfast” was pretty good.
ioioio
December 6, 2005, 4:30pm
4
In Zen and the art of IKEA cupboard assembly, we got this great line by Coldfire :
DAMN you Pythagoras, and the equation you rode in on.
plnnr
December 6, 2005, 4:43pm
5
“If ‘stupid’ were cornflakes, you’d be General Mills.”
By lno, in this thread
Seems to have spawned ripoff attempts, but none will ever be as funny as this one.
“I am the goddamned hall monitor!” – manhattan
Risha
December 7, 2005, 4:13am
9
In this thread we were discussing a Tivo that was recording Mexican porn upon its own volition.
Shirley Ujest :
I, for one, welcome our TiVo overlords.
or should it be I, for Juan, welcome… oh, never mind.
In this thread , **hawthorne ** has a real zinger:
I think I first saw the quote on teemings .
Oh, the previous two zingers were NICE. Now I got one, from Electronic Chaos posting on a thread about rumors of a divorce between Britney Spears and her husband, K-Fed:
(In respons to someone ridiculing K-Fed’s name):
ivylass
December 7, 2005, 6:27pm
13
Probably too long for what you’re looking for, but this entire original post is the best tearing to shreds of another poster that I have ever seen.
In this thread , a discussion of Cat Stevens’ name being on a No-Fly list, Little Nemo dropped this little observation:
So Yusuf Islam can’t travel by plane because he advocates his religious beliefs, he’s spoken out in favor of the death penalty, and he’s had some financial dealings with questionable groups in the Middle East.
I wonder if George Bush is on the same list?
Classic, IMO.
Found another one, this one from Slithy Tove
Smeghead:
Especially considering that given the amount of DNA recoverable from the guts of amber-trapped insects, the analogy is comparable to saying “We have the words ‘the,’ ‘and,’ and a half dozen random consonants, but we filled in the gaps with the text of ‘War and Peace’ to recreate the Bible.”
From Science Mistakes which Ruin Movies (spoilers!)
I got this exchange from somewhere - I couldn’t find the original thread, or the names of the posters, so much apologies in advance:
Many moons ago, a poster poured out a heartfelt tale of the Mcdonald’s she worked at burning down. It was in the pit and was very sad.
About ten posts in, poster Finagle (i think, it was forever ago and I can’t search) said,
“you want fires with that?”
To this day, it’s the funniest thing I ever read here.
In a political thread, Weirddave launched this zinger:
Also, I’m not condescending towards you because of your politics, I’m condescending towards you because you fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down before landing in the idiot bush on moron hill.
Thank you, thank you. . It’s an honor just to be nominated.
PigBoy
December 8, 2005, 6:07am
20
There’s always Cecil’s famous “Eat shit and die, you loser.”
