Posit a man, which we shall call A. A draws a triangle with vertices Jack, Cynthia and BRIAN BLESSED… 
Anyway, OP : shut yo mouth.
Isn’t the OP based in Pakistan? Context and the repercussions on W could be very different to USA.
There will be no repercussion on W beyond the ordinary. Divorce and possible problems in getting a good settlement are about it.
Although, she did call me today on my cell. I did not answer.
If C was my close friend, I would have told her wife to either clarify things about future with C within some short time say 15 days or end the extra marital affair. If she didn’t do either of these two, I would have told C abt her affair.
If C was just a casual friend, I would have urged his wife the same thing, but wouldnt have told C if she failed to adhere. I’d have maintained a distance with C and her wife.
I think it’s pretty tacky to interfere in someone else’s relationship when you are not personally involved. That being the case, perhaps you should blackmail W into having an affair with you (she is the type after all) and then you can reveal your affair to C. This way you come out of it with your purity of spirit intact. Kind of.
I don’t do married women. And I am pretty sure (nay certain) that the above scenario is rape.
Unless this is a woosh.
Even without any additional details, it would certainly put me on the alert. Probably explain a lot of things that otherwise make no sense, too.
I know the second point is true from personal experience. Now, I don’t even wait for additional proof.
If she calls you again, you probably should take the call. Let her know that you believe she owes her spouse the truth because of STD and other risk factors, but that you don’t want to be involved in her shit and she should leave you alone.
I think the issue isn’t that you used Wikipedia, but that you didn’t actually quote the text that was from another source (quote marks, vbulletin quote box, whatever); nor did you even mention any outside source at all.*
That’s why I raised my eyebrow at your post, before I even saw CarnalK’s post about it.
- Made all the more noticeable by the bracketed citation numbers you left in.
Your colleague’s marriage really isn’t your business to get involved in, so I wouldn’t volunteer the information. On the other hand, you’re not obligated to cover up for W, either, so don’t lie if someone asks about it.
I don’t like the idea of an anonymous note. It has all the potential to stir up all sorts of bad feelings, but it has no credibility, since you don’t know who sent it and why, and no opportunity for the recipient to ask follow-up questions.
Thought I put the link in there, my fault on that as I submitted that on my phone. (Although it was quite obvious since I wasn’t using the footnotes that I didn’t edit out).
I know a lot of people are saying someone else’s marriage is not their business. Let’s examine that in other contexts…
You find out that someone’s financial planner is embezzeling their money. Should you tell them? After all, it’s not your finances being meddled with.
You find out that someone’s doctor is reusing needles after treating AIDS patients. Should you tell them? After all, it’s not your doctor reusing needles.
You find out that the <insert service provider here> is providing <service> to somebody other than your friend using your friend’s funds. Should you tell them? After all, it’s not your service being scammed.
Alright, admittedly that last one is too misogynistic for my tastes, but I think you get the point. If it was any other relationship with another person, and you found out that person was cheating your friend, you’d say something. But, for the one person who is all of those relationships at once, you think we should stay silent?! After all, your spouse affects your finances, your health, shared household responsibilities, etc.
I know I would want someone to tell me if they knew my spouse was cheating.
Seems like the reasoning for not telling someone is “more drama for you”. Which, if that’s your reasoning, makes you seem like a terrible friend - you wouldn’t help a friend out if it might cause drama?
Anyway, I wouldn’t be able to sleep at night keeping a secret like that. Decide if you can sleep at night with that or not.
If you do decide to tell, I would play it off like you assumed it was harmless and let the guy figure it out. Something like “You dog! I didn’t know you’d talked your wife into an open relationship! How long have you two been playing the field? I know you’ve gotta be doing better than your wife after seeing what she picked up a <blah>. Come, I’m living vicariously here!” I think the different tone would make it credible but not accusatory. And then he and his wife can work out their marital problems.
It’s one of those things with no right answers because quite frankly getting involved in this sort of business the best you can expect is to break even, unfortunately though you’re already involved somewhat. If it were me though I would probably tell them, because I feel if you cheat then the consequences are all on you and if the situation were reversed I would want to know.
yellowjacketcoder, if this were a close friend, and you knew the situation well, I think you would have a point. But as the OP wrote, their relationship is pretty tenuous, which is, in itself, an argument for not getting involved:
That changes things, IMO. You know C well enough that his wife has your phone number, and she’s directly involving you. If she had never said anything to you, you could just pretend you weren’t sure what you saw, if it ever came up. But not now. She’s made it your business.
Answer the next call, listen to what she says, then decide. If she doesn’t call again, then it’s more awkward.
I’d always want to know and would be grateful to the person who told me. Just a kiss would not necessarily mean a marriage break-up, but could prompt us to examine whether our marriage was working and try to make it work. If you do tell C, make it clear that you’re not telling anyone else (except us).
Sorry for being a dick. I was cranky. The fact that there was nothing other than the wikipedia cut’n’paste in your whole post just grated.
That’s a fair point - I wouldn’t go finding a stranger on the street to let them know their wife is cheating. My thought is that if they’re close enough that the OP knows what his coworker’s wife looks like, and close enough that the wife has OP’s cell number, they’re close enough to be considered friends. Even if OP is downplaying the relationship.
Do you have any way to know a) whether she actually slept with this guy or just snogged him, and b) whether it was a once-off or an ongoing thing?
Because if it was a once-off snog, I don’t think it’s hugely important for Chuck to know about it. It’s still a shitty thing for her to do, but for most people it wouldn’t have the potential to change their whole marriage and their whole lives, the way a full-blown affair would.
I would definitely keep quiet about a once-off kiss. An affair, I really don’t know - it would depend on how well I knew Chuck and how well I knew Wilma and all kinds of other factors.
I do know there’s no chance I’d send an anonymous note. If I decided the right thing to do was tell Chuck, then I’d tell him straight out.
OK I will ask if no one else will…
Is she hot? 
Bear in mind that if she goes to him and confesses, and he forgives her, and *then *you tell him, then you’ll be the bad guy as far as they’re concerned.