Hmm…most of the gay guys I know are in much better shape than me. Many look like they live in the gym…guess I should start hitting the elliptical machine if I want those kind of results. Hmm…would I then be a gym metrosexual?
I think you need to get off of your sorry ass and find a new gym. Maybe one without all of those gay-ass ellipticals…[insert rolleyes] Honestly, must be a really shitty gym if you need to beg for a treadmill and every treadmill has a 20 minute time limit.
Sam
Never heard of an official waiting list for machines. Either my gym is unpopular or they have enough machines – I suppose it’s a little of both.
We have a 30 minute rule on the cardio machines, but I run 25-30 miles per week, impossible to do in 30 minutes per day. I do my best to keep my eyes open to see if the room is filling up. I figure that as long as there are empty treadmills around me, I can keep running for an hour if I’m up to it.
If we did have a waiting list, I would be upset if anyone breached the protocol too. If she were apologetic about it I wouldn’t think about it twice, but there are plenty of folks in the world who act rude when you call them on their accidential cutting in line.
Don’t be slamming those elliptical trainers, now. I wouldn’t even advocate their removal from the gym if I were you. You will be thankful that God created the elliptical trainer on the day that you have leg injuries that preclude cycling/running for several months and your orthopod tells you “it’s the elliptical trainer or nothing.” I was faced with this choice for six months last year and, though I dislike working out on one, it kept my legs in shape so I could resume running after my recovery.
Those machines are excellent for keeping in shape without stressing the joints too much.
I love the elliptical - that shit is a serious workout, man. Tried it going backwards? The first time I did I was in a world of pain the next day, I assure you.
It’s true that I’ve never seen a man on one, er. But I guess that’s because they all think I’ll think they’re gay? Anyway, I’ve never had to wait for one. 
They do tend to get squeaky, though, which is amazingly annoying.
Cardio machines in general are for pussies. If you were a real man you’d be outside running or biking up mountains in the dark and snow/rain/hail/blizzards/tornados. Or inside pumping iron. 
Having said that, I do my 5 minute warmup before lifting on the stationary bike. Yeah, I’m a pussy.
My wrath is for people who mess with the squat rack or use it improperly. Stealing the bar and not replacing it, racking a huge amount of weight on the bar and not unracking it (this goes for other places, too, of course), doing freaking bicep curls in the squat rack or doing those stupid looking power curtsies some people do when they cheat at squats.
On a more serious note, do you have to work out at this gym? I find that I’m actually willing to play slightly more per month for a place that isn’t so crowded after work. I gather from my coworkers that other local gyms here can get kinda heavy traffic during peak times–I work out at the Y and hardly ever see many people there. Haven’t had to wait for anything yet, actually.
A pussy? Hell, unless you’re just using the plastic chick hand weights, I’m pretty impressed.
I can see how you could do curls, shoulder presses, but how do you bench on those things?
There’s a list?
Sounds like you need to find a bigger gym with more equipment.
No, you’re a FUCKING PROBLEM RIGHT HERE. Who cares if it’s real life or a message board, using gay as an insult puts you on the same intellectual level as banana slugs and people who use WebTV.
People would have no problem supporting a rant about idiots who don’t know about the waiting lists, but then you went off on a pathetic, limp-dicked, weak-assed, chicken legged whine about people who don’t excerise in the Trunk approved style (now with tapioca for brains) and expect people with more than three functioning brain cells not to notice?!
:wally
Treadmill give me shin splints and the bike makes my ass hurt. I don’t give a shit if the elliptical is “gay”. I get a good workout (better than on a bike or a treadmill) that doesn’t cause my screwed up knees to ache. Who the fuck are you to comment on my workout choices? Go change into your special shoes, gym nazi.
That is like sooooo gay. A real man wouldn’t let the threat of death get in his way.
:smack:
How could I have missed your altruistic motives? It’s not all about you; it’s about everyone being free to exercise in their own faggy way.
:mad:
Extraordinarily offensive. If you don’t understand why, replace it with this sentence: “That is so black. Don’t be such a nigger.” Both are slurs based on inborn characteristics which are not inherently negative. Don’t do this.
Death? I think he’s really just worried about getting his fancy shoes scuffed up. They’re Italian, you know.
Trunk, I have the feeling you’re just kvetching to blow off steam, but if you actually give a damn you should complain to gym management.
No, fuck YOU. I walk on a treadmill five days a week for 30-45 minutes (depending on whether I’m also doing strength training that day). I walk quite briskly and get my heart rate up to 120-135, which is squarely in my target range. Yes, I am trying to lose weight and I haven’t lost much yet, so I’m sure to you I am just some stereotypical fat chick wasting your precious gym time. But I can’t run yet – my joints can’t take it until I lose more weight. Doesn’t mean I’m not improving my health.
You’re not my doctor, and you don’t live in my body. So you have no right to tell me how I should work out.
One more reason to be grateful that I have access to a facility where I’m usually the only one there.
Jesus Fucking Christ! I thought exercise was supposed to release endorphins that mellowed people out.
You people need to get off those machines, sit back in front of a TV, and fire up a bong, or something. (Note to mods, and impressionable people – ) At least get more ketchup into your diet.
Fuck.
It’s easy. Just flip it over and bench the bike from the floor. Bonus points if you follow it up with an olympic clean and jerk while screaming like a barbarian.
Side question to gay dopers: What unique exercises did you do in the '80s that defined the gay “'80’s style”? I belonged to gyms all through the '80s, but other than some odd goings on in the jacuzzi, I’ve never seen anything that looked like '80s style gay exercise. Unless it was that day that they were doing aerobics to Queen…
No fucking shit. But he told me to stay away from the gym, not stay out of the pit.
All right, now I’m pissed.
I didn’t think I’d have to do this, but I’m making a list and sending it to Jesus.
Now on the list. . .
Telemark
Lord Ashtar
Brutus
Tristan
Rufus
AugustWest
Bambi Hassenpfeffer (Especially. . .god was that a gay post.)
Cheesesteak (Lay off the shoes, dude. Lay off. The shoes.)
Telemark, again. (I heard you the first time. You don’t like people calling something gay. Got it.)
When Jesus comes back for us, you’ll all be smote severely.
Please note, there is a list. If you try to snipe a smote, you will be doubly smote.
I’d be highly suspicious of those universal machines. Ever see the Judas Priest video for “Hot Rocking”?