If you like rollicking mythology, you gotta read Revelation! It’s right up there with the classical Greek mythology for its lurid bloodthirsty battles between the gods and demons, the blood poured out on the continents, the multi-headed monster animals, the lurid depredations of the Whore of Babylon, the capture and chaining of the Dragon for a thousand years, those four famous ghost Horsemen, and on and on.
For best reading, stop by your local Jehovah’s Witnesses facility and ask if their book on Revelation is still in print. It consists of the entire book, but just a few verses on each page with extensive explanatory commentary (far more extensive, imaginative, and lurid than the original text itself!), and of course those lavish and majestic illustrations that Jehovah’s Witness publications are famous for! It cost only $3 (this was back in about 1990).
When they came knocking at my door hawking this book, I bought it immediately. I recommend it highly! (ETA: Maybe you can find it on-line.)
(a) Except as otherwise provided in this section, whoever, in any matter within the jurisdiction of the executive, legislative, or judicial branch of the Government of the United States, knowingly and willfully—
(1)
falsifies, conceals, or covers up by any trick, scheme, or device a material fact;
(2)
makes any materially false, fictitious, or fraudulent statement or representation; or
(3)
makes or uses any false writing or document knowing the same to contain any materially false, fictitious, or fraudulent statement or entry;
shall be fined under this title, imprisoned not more than 5 years or, if the offense involves international or domestic terrorism (as defined in section 2331), imprisoned not more than 8 years, or both. If the matter relates to an offense under chapter 109A, 109B, 110, or 117, or section 1591, then the term of imprisonment imposed under this section shall be not more than 8 years.
Again, IANAL but I assume Giuliani spouting off in public as a regular citizen isn’t subject to that but acting in his official capacity as Trump’s lawyer in front of the state legislators might be.
That’s the federal statute. This appears to be the Georgia one:
A person who knowingly and willfully falsifies, conceals, or covers up by any trick, scheme, or device a material fact; makes a false, fictitious, or fraudulent statement or representation; or makes or uses any false writing or document, knowing the same to contain any false, fictitious, or fraudulent statement or entry, in any matter within the jurisdiction of any department or agency of state government or of the government of any county, city, or other political subdivision of this state shall, upon conviction thereof, be punished by a fine of not more than $1,000.00 or by imprisonment for not less than one nor more than five years, or both.
Shout out to everyone who’s called it Revelation. It’s one ‘shroom-chompin’ old guy, one hastily-scribbled diary, one Rev.
My question, which I’ve asked of many clergy and seminarians, Why the FUCK is this in the Bible?!?
I don’t know a single person who’s said “I’m living a better life after reading that.”
On the other hand, I think it’s screwed up so many people who try to figure it out… “Okay, so the Humungous Lego Vulture With Googly Eyes is there to represent the USA, because early Christians knew we’d go astray by having gays, so the Off-Balance Duplo Cherubim would have to “cleave us in twain”, and that means Texas The Cowardly Lion will secede in 1998, no 2018… oops, let’s make that 2028…”
It’s in the Bible because what it actually says is “yeah the Romans are killing you but hang tight cuz secretly the Lord’s got your back.” It’s not about predicting the distant future. It’s describing the present (i.e., late 1st century) and saying God’s gonna smite the people hurting you.
Yes this. It was commentary about the world as it was at the time and was relevant while included. Today it’s often misappropriated by the same kinds of people who believe in Ancient Aliens or try to interpret Nostradamus, in trying to predict the future or point out why the world is ending.
And remember - interpreting locusts shaped like horses with human faces as “attack helicopters” is a “literal interpretation” not one of those fancy-schmancy metaphors…
I once found a book or “scholarly” (I have no idea how much that term applies) paper that posits Saint Paul as the Antichrist. That explains why so much of Paul’s teachings deviate from Jesus’s.
While looking for that or something like it, I came across this, um, interesting theory:
Religious and biblical scholar Bart Ehrman makes the provocative case that many of our widely held beliefs concerning the divinity of Jesus, the Trinity, and the divine origins of the Bible itself are the results of both intentional and accidental alterations by scribes.
He also makes the case that most of Paul’s writings were not actually written by Paul. He says that was a hard shift in attitude towards women in the church that makes him think that it was one of Paul’s students that wrote the later 'letters to the Corinthians;
Eh, Revelation is about those times when everything goes to shit, once clear-thinking people now completely off their rocker, immoral leaders who deceive millions who toss away their sense of right and wrong in support of this guy, and the population is rocked by famine, disease, war, and more.
Good thing we don’t have situations like that in these Enlightened times.
Yes, indeed. Some very large percentage of fundamentalists (of all religions, not just Christianity) salivate about the Apocalypse, whatever vocabulary they may use to describe it. Somehow it always involves severe mutilation and agony for people who annoy them.
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Yeah, it’s predictable that whatever Jeremiah Johnson (the Trump fan) meant specifically, in practice it translates to ‘everyone has to do exactly as I say all the time, and the result will be a Society/Church/World that is a bride ready for Jebus.’
Fundamentalism is always about making everyone else obey you because reasons (“you” as God’s Messenger, of course).
Yes, that’s exactly the book: Revelation: Its Grand Climax at Hand, with the red cover. I was hoping to find the full text, including all the illustrations, on-line, but I haven’t found that yet. Again, I highly recommend this book, just for the marvelous action-packed mythology of it all! It’s definitely a fun read, and this JW embellished version all the more so!
