A Post Party Proposition

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I hereby suggest the following rigid rules for when post parties will be appropriate:

Post Count: 1
An Introduction, everyone will say “welcome and talk to Coldfire about felching.”

Post Count: 10
Don’t bring much food because everyone is going to ignore you for being the newbie that you are.

Post Count: 100
Everybody will be thinking “Do I know this person” but they will stick around for the free food in the hope that Shayna will take her top off again.

Post Count: 1,000
You’re king of the hill. Everybody knows your name and your quirks. Complete strangers will offer to get naked and play twister with you. All the sexiest people of the opposite sex will compete to serve up the least subtle sexual innuendo about the host. Newbies with post counts of 14 will try to talk but they will be summarily ignored.

Post Count: 10,000
Don’t bring much food because everyone is going to ignore you in the off chance that you’ll finally shut the fuck up.

Any other post parties should be viewed as sins against nature and lead to the “accidental” reset of the person’s post count.

2

I’ll bring the beer this time, only it’s Riessling. There’s some beer for any other curmudgeons that share your Bah Humbug views.

Here’s a toast to the failure to celebrate!

3

A post party proposition? Is that when you hit on someone as you’re leaving?

4

Quoth obfusciatrist:

Yeah, that’s what I thought…

5

This is HYSTERICAL (and probably true, too!)

Scotti

6

Damn. And here I was getting ready for my 500th post blow-out. I was even gonna bring out naked dancing girls specifically for obfusciatrist. I guess I’ll just have to call the caterer and cancel. :wink: