And if you don’t volunteer to help out your close family in a time of need, then you re a selfish asshole and deserve all the scorn you get.
The selfish assholes who deserve all the scorn that can be heaped upon them are people are quite willing to take advantage of their relatives claiming it’s a “time of need” when the entire problem could have been avoided by planning ahead. There is no mention of this woman miraculously giving birth after being unaware she was pregnant. She had months to plan and hire extra help if she needed it, instead of expect other people who have lives of their own to provide that help for free.
As did her husband, whose responsibility here has been glossed over.
Coraline 2: The ‘other’ grandmother.
You are one sad & broken little troll, aren’t you?
Just once, can you surprise everybody and just act like you’re fucking normal?
Yep, if he’s living in the same house or anywhere nearby and isn’t severely disabled, there’s no reason he can’t do some of the work. Also normal healthy newborns can be left in cribs or baby carriers without an adult hovering over them, long enough for a parent to shower or take a break.
Normal is realizing babies are not little gods or fragile snowflakes and having one doesn’t entitle anyone to special privileges. This isn’t like a tragic injury that couldn’t be avoided. The parents had plenty of time to prepare. Sad & broken is anyone that believes they are required to provide unpaid services for an extended relative in a nuclear family.
Thanks for showing up to share in my thread ZPG…now piss off.
Anyway, just that one opportunity to have a shower without a time limit, and an extended nap has worked wonders for my daughter in law. She is feeling much better and less overwhelmed (as first time mums are wont to be).
Dad (my son) is doing everything at home but still has to earn a living. And unfortunately, due to unforeseen and circumstances out of their control (a project that has gone way over-time) both he and the grandfather are pulling out all stops to get the job finished…hence working 7 days a week at the moment.
Hopefully that job will be over soon and life will get back to a level that will see Dad able to down tools as needed.
Thanks for letting me vent all the same. 
You really can’t even fathom that there is an alternate, some would say dominant, view of the world than the one you live in.
Nobody is idolizing babies in this thread. Nobody thinks having a baby entitles you to special privileges. But there are certain accepted norms that come with being part of the family. Relatives helping out with kids is one. The other is relatives helping out with seniors that can no longer take care of themselves. Yet another is relatives helping out adults that have become ill or disabled. It’s not a localized and quaint custom. It’s fucking universal. Where ever there are generations of families living in proximity, there tends to be a generally accepted give and take when it comes to caring after one another.
I’m sorry you’re too broken and damaged to understand simple social contracts. I’m sorry you feel the need to vent your poison at the mere mention of children. But it’s not our fault you lived a fucked up childhood. I’m sorry your mother damaged you beyond repair. I’m sorry you can only see life through the lens of your own fucked up filters. I’m sorry that you feel the need to make it ALL ABOUT YOU every goddamn time.
Get some fucking mental help or just learn to shut the fuck up. God damn it, you grow more and more tiresome with this shit.
As a non-breeder, I actually do worship babies, but specifically Tod-Lor, the Baby God.
The only problem is, He requires infant sacrifices, and you can only imagine what an awkward conundrum that puts me in…
If Kambuckta wants to rant about someone, it should be the daughter-in-law not the mother who may well be at an age and an income level where providing free child care is not practical. I live in an extended family where relatives help each other out all the time. I am/have been the custodial guardian for several of my nieces and nephews. Kambuckta is not ranting about a give and take relationship within a functioning extended. She’s criticizing the other grandmother specifically for not providing free childcare in a situation where a functioning adult had obviously all the time in the world to make appropriate arrangements.
ZPG you just don’t seem to have a clue how normal, functioning families operate. Thus, your contributions to this thread are worthless.
G’orn, piss off.
I am a member of a great, normal functioning family. One of the rules is we don’t take advantage of each other. If you need help ask for it, but don’t expect to freeload off of people.
I guess I should piss off, too, since I believe it’s crap to excuse the father (your son) who had half the responsibility in creating the baby and not the other grandma who doesn’t have any direct legal responsibility.
Your son and his wife had several months of notice that the baby was coming and instead of setting aside enough money to afford to care for and bond w/ the baby and explain to his project boss that his baby was first priority, your son chose work over his family. In fact, he chose his paying job over YOUR paying job and over his wife’s immediate needs. All the women in this situation have needs that are less important than his.
And if they couldn’t set aside funds like that w/ several months of notice then maybe they couldn’t afford this baby and hopefully they’ll plan their next one better.
I’m a childless, middle-aged female and the various nasty barbs you and others have shot at ZPG have been said to me simply b/c I don’t have kids and I’m not in perpetual and public mourning over that fact. Few things get your dander up more than a woman who doesn’t acknowledge the preeminence of her natural place as a childkeeper.
Hey, Kambuckta, just wanted to say congrats and good on you for being a fantastic grandma, MIL, and mum.
Great rant.
Pitty it got hijacked by a troll and a baby hater.
Babies are great.
People with empathy are even better.
Babies are cute though. That has to count for something.
ZPG doesn’t bother me at all.
Thank og for the ignore function.
You misspelled “humans.”
[QUOTE=Nawth Chucka]
I’m a childless, middle-aged female and the various nasty barbs you and others have shot at ZPG have been said to me simply b/c I don’t have kids and I’m not in perpetual and public mourning over that fact.
[/QUOTE]
You have argued that babies should be murdered? :eek:
No, of course not, which is why people are saying those things to ZPG and not to you.
kambuckta Praise to you from a Decidedly Excitedly Expectant First-Time Grampa-to-be (next month)
man I am so giddy with joy I can barely sit still
Nawth Chucka Dad choosing to work like he is on this project probably wasn’t as simple a decision as all that. In my experience as a full time parent (kids at home) for nearly 30 years (I spread 'em out) there are a lot of variables that have to be weighed and balanced. It could be and probably was the best, most optimal choice to make for their family. Please don’t take this to be mean or angry or anything like that cause I’m really not and its really not meant that way.
ZPG just…sigh…nevermind
Congratulations Grampa…you’re gonna LOVE it (the baby as well as grandparent-hood)
It wasn’t (and isn’t). Without going into too many details, this ‘project’ was meant to have been finished about 3 months ago. However due to random change of plans by architects etc, the deadline has been stretched and stretched, and now the owners of said project are just shitty as hell: hence why the dad and the grandad are working so hard…
I know you’re all pissed off, but it sounds like that family has issues, or at least the grandmother. Can your son just get a babysitter to come in a couple days a week for a couple of hours?