…my heart. I just found out that my crush of 6 months likes (as in, has a crush on) my (basically) archnemisis. He’s mean, cruel and violent most of the time to me, but he’s nice to all the girls (kinda shows how little their friendships with me matter, but that’s another issue 
). It’s horrible, since, well, I really don’t like him and I really like her
I need soothing words. Any would help. Advice maybe too.
BTDT. Twice. In one year.
Your heart is not broken, just bent. I will let you in on a secret about women. We see someone and say “hubba, hubba, hubba. This guy is gorgeous”. Then if he is not nice on the inside we find that our view of him changes. He becomes a dog.
Now let’s say we meet someone who is not so great looking. As we find this guy is beautiful on the inside, our view of him changes and he now becomes good looking.
Reading your OP, I see that you are finding this guy in the dog category. He is not worth your time or energy. There are too many nice guys out there to bother with worthless scum.
As for the other girl, also not worthy of your valuable time.
You are too good for them.
I hate bastards like that. You could always say he was gay though, and he was acting out his insecurities and getting a girlfriend as a cover. Put KY in his backpack. heh heh heh.
I am going through the same thing, buddy. It really sucks. Best thing to do is just give up.
I find duct tape fixes anything. If it doesn’t work on your heart, try it on his head.
No, no… scratch that.
I suspect many girls go through a “jerk phase” where they are attracted to jerks for their imaginary confidence and self-esteem. Warn her about him, but expect her to date him anyway. You may yet have a chance with her after he screws up. Or she may be too blind to see him for what he is ever. But true love can be more than just romantic. You have a role to play in her life. Perhaps it will be a romantic one but perhaps it will be one of friend and protector. Being a friend does not mean loving her less, but just in a different way. And by protector I do mean for you to watch out for her, but if you outthink your opponent you can avoid a direct confrontation. If he does physically hurt her, call in the artillery. Her parents, the police… such things are nothing to fool around with. Be patient. Be calm. Good luck, Ender.
Hmm. I realize red_dragon was probably just kidding and all, but that’s so not cool… jokes like that make it really hard for people in high school to feel comfortable coming out.
Again, I realize it was just joke, but we’re fighting ignorance and all here, folks. Carry on.
::Agrees completely::
Speaker, I’m thinking that eventually this girl you like will eventually realize that this other guy “is” a total jerk. No matter how nice he is right now, no one can hide forever.
Be her friend. Have that crush. (They’re so great) And be there to help her up after this guy screws it all up. That’s the best advice “I” know how to give.
In the meantime, Speaker, take care of yourself, and I’m really sorry to hear this. I know it’s not easy, but people will rally to you. They always do that for the good guys in the end.
No, I wan’t joking. I wasn’t trying to hurt Speaker any more. I just wanted him to realize that others were going through the same crap. Like me. I am always around.
Just wanted him to know that loneliness doesn’t pick favourites.
But I realize I may have sounded a little harsh. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Just make sure it isn’t a train!
She may find out he’s a jerk, but if he’s good in the sack she may not care. I find that’s the case a lot of the time, girls will admit that a guy is a total asshole but can’t give up the great sex. I even saw a female comedian the other night talking about how it’s unfair that all the best lays are assholes, and suggested keeping two men, one to confide in and go do fun things with, and one for ‘break your back’ sex.
red_dragon60, I meant this:
I realize you’re trying to make your friend feel better by making the other guy look bad. Doing it by accusing the other guy of being gay, however, is not very enlightened. It implies to the people around you that being gay is bad. You may not mean this, but your words and action tell other kids that are gay that they’re open to rejection and ridicule.
Again, I realize you’re joking and my aim is to shed some light, not bash. But remember that your words can hurt in ways you don’t realize.
Keep that in mind, k?
Cut to the chase. Ask her which one she wants.
if she’s got a crush on him, leave her be. Get on with life. It’s too short for this BS.
and here
Well Rasa, you caught my attempt at a joke. I was just trying to lighten the mood, but you are right.
Ever see Malcom in the Middle when Francis meets with his long-distance girlfirend? She breaks up with him, and he shares some interesting advice. A strange peace comes over you when you find yourself in that position. It hurts, but there is a non-feeling part of it. Try ot embrace that non-feeling. It is a release from your emotions. It is a buddhist kind of thing. Distance yourself from the loneliness.
Also, to hold a feeling inside is to magnify it a thousand-fold. Tell her how you feel. At the very least, it will give you closure. Good luck in the grand scheme.
That is not necessarily true, Simetra. It really depends on the girl. If the girl really is a nice girl with her head on straight, yes, she will eventually find out that the guy is a jerk, but if she has low self esteem or is a complete bitch, it won’t happen… at least in my experience. The girl will just continue to take the abuse and figure that the guy she’s with is the best she can do, or he will intimidate her into staying with him. Some women’s self esteem is so low that they figure it’s better to stay with a jerk than to be alone.
One of my favorite scenes from the Simpsons is when the girl Bart has a crush on tells him that she’s interested in an older kid. She reaches into his chest, pulls out the heart, laughs “You won’t need this anymore”, and flings it against the wall of the treehouse where it slowly drips to the floor. Captures the sensation perfectly.
Yeah, I remember that. Ah well, I’ll get over her, but I’m not done flirting yet! 
Speaker for the Dead wrote:
Ever thought about video taping him in the act of being mean, cruel, and violent to you (or to others, perhaps?) and then showing it to your would-be girlfriend?