A good friend of mine will soon be marking his 20th year sober. He managed to overcome addictions to alcohol, cocaine and cigarettes.
Obviously, this is a huge event in his life and I’m happy for him. But I’ve never been to an AA meetings (I don’t drink at all), and I’ve never had overcome an addiction.
Hopefully this is not going to sound too clueless, but what should I expect?
Lots of people congratulating him, if they know ahead of time it is his 20 year anniversary there might be a cake, and they may ask him to say a few words and share some of his history and coping techniques.
And lots more congratulations, and a 20 year tchatchke coin. http://i12.ebayimg.com/05/i/000/b9/33/98ff_2.JPG
Two basic aspects of AA, and recovery, are humility and vigilence. The disease of addiction may be in remission for 20 years, but it is always threatening to reemerge, as aggressive as ever. It is when someone becomes smug about the fact that they’ve beaten addiction that they are most at risk of a relapse.
So, while your friend and their fellow AA’ers will be appreciative of 20 years, I wouldn’t expect too much in the way of ceremony or celebration. 20 years is great, but it is no guarantee of future success. The only way to ensure future success is to keep doing what you’ve been doing for the last 2 decades - which is to take it one day at a time.
Since the OP is looking for personal experiences, this is better suited for IMHO.
Colibri
General Questions Moderator
Once you make 20 years in AA, you’re generally considered an “old timer” by fellow AAers.
However, calling your friend “old timer” might not be appropriate unless you are recovering too.
Generally I’ve not seen too much celebrating with the normies (that’s you non-alcoholics) when someone hits a milestone.
QtM, who is not quite up to ‘old timer’ status yet. But my sobriety may soon be old enough to vote, if I don’t mess up before then. 
Alcohol.cigarettes and cocaine. What was the hardest. ?
From what I’ve heard, I’m going to guess cigarettes.
I’d say so, having kicked all three.
I see “normies” at meetings quite a bit when someone has a birthday. If the style of the meeting is to go around the room and have everybody identify (“Hi, I’m EJsGirl and I’m an alcoholic”), feel free to just say “I’m gaffa and I’m a visitor.” You’ll be fine.
I am assuming you will be in an “open” meeting, where all are welcome, regardless of whether or not you’re an alcoholic (you just can’t share- speak to the group during the meeting). You will probably hear some combination of the AA preamble, a reading or two from our book, a short speaker and maybe some sharing from group members.
Nothing scary.
Cool, thanks for the info.
In my neck of the woods a celebration is a bit different from a regular meeting. The person celebrating usually has a speaker or two of their choice to share and speak in the front of the room. Then the celebrating person speaks a bit as well. Then we have cake! This is for AA.
For NA, it’s a bigger deal. People bring family,friends, balloons, gifts, etc. I’ve seen a little of that in AA but in NA it’s on a grander scale.
As an outsider, you can sit back and relax, you don’t have to do much but listen.
Congratulate them and remember that 20 years is a milestone, but it was only reached through stringing together quite a few 24 hours periods.
We only get a daily repreive contingent on following a few basic principles.
And what QTM and others said.
