nm
fuck it
I have been comparing his inability to see below the surface with the growing ability of my children to understand there is complexity in the world.
While my eight-year-old caught has left him in the dust, he is still giving my six-year-old son a run for his money.
I hope that is of some comfort to him.
Well, if you can get that as a headline in the New York Post, Ace might see it and get cheered up.
Or the Daily Mail might put tits on it to really catch his attention.
Acey’s preferred method of rodent control: (1) Set out sticky traps; (2) wait for the distinctive sound of a mouse thrashing around wildly on a sticky trap; (3) smash the mouse flat with a brick; (4) toss the whole bloody mess into the trash. Easy peasy!
Yeah, if you’re cutting across Acey’s lawn, stay off the big Post-It notes…
aceplace57
Really? How cold did you think it was in Space?
On a cloudy day?
After sunset.
LOL. He is the gift that never stops giving.
It’s very cold in space. I learned that from Star Trek II.
Mars ain’t the kind of place
To raise your kids
In fact, it’s cold as hell
And there’s no one there to raise them
If you did
pfft How can space be cold with all those stars and the great big sun up there?
The astronauts use space heaters.
I always love it when Acey learns something new. My favorite example is his discovery of the word audacity:
7-22-15: Acey sees the word “audacity” in a headline about Obama and is astonished that the President uses a freeware audio editor. Then he discovers that “audacity” is a word—a very old, very obscure word that nobody ever uses—and starts a thread about it.
Followup post: Acey doesn’t like the word “audacity.” It’s pompous and snobbish, and makes you sound like an asshole. Besides, nobody he knows ever uses it.
Another followup: Acey brags about knowing the word “audacity,” and quotes a dictionary definition. He’s been reading all his life, you see, and is very good at figuring out what words mean. But he still thinks it’s a shitty word.
9-11-16: Acey uses the word “audacity” in a post criticizing CNN and Hillary Clinton.
What do you know, he is capable of learning!
So, since we’re bringing out the oldies, I found what may be my all time favorite aceplace57 thread ever.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=790704&page=1
In this thread ( one of countless transgender bathroom threads), AP57 is very concerned about the lack of safety in bathrooms. He doesn’t want young children exposed to perverts. He doesn’t want young children to see things they shouldn’t see.
And he’s convinced that people of both sexes regularly flaunt their genitals in public restrooms.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=19267921&postcount=26
He reacts with disbelief at the idea that women DON’T expose themselves while in the bathroom
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=19268009&postcount=36
To prove his point, he talks about his public restroom behavior.
Apparently Acey and his coworkers routinely strip down in the public men’s room.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=19268024&postcount=40
And then he continues to disbelieve that women are so shy that that actually close the stall door. With further examples of his own “not shy” bathroom behavior.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=19269269&postcount=69
And while he keeps his undies on, apparently HIS undies have an always gape open at the crotch,which is conveniently located at a young child’s eye level.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=19272158&postcount=119
The whole thread is really an aceplace57 amusement park. I guess he kind of proved that it’s not safe for a young child to share a bathroom with aceplace57
Well, see, his wife always leaves the bathroom door open – in the privacy of their own home. Apparently letting your husband see you spread eagle peeing is exactly the same as letting a complete stranger do so. :smack:
That is indeed classic Acey stuff. I like how he refers to the men’s room as “an extension of my work space,” and throws in those winking smiley emoticons—as if to say, You guys get me, don’t you?—whenever he talks fondly about getting naked around other guys.
Imaginary wives have no need of privacy or modesty.
“Changing clothes after basketball. A short run. A quick bj, nothing gay, mind you … just a little something to take the edge off until I get home to my wife.”
(oK, I made up some of that).
But later on in the thread he starts in about bathrooms and hookers and hook-ups. It seemed well researched.