Admit it. You just watched The Bachelor...

…and you liked it! Loved it, even, but in a dirty way.
Though I’m tired of the whole bag, really, I just had to tune in when I found out Charlie O’Connell (of Sliders fame- no, not his brother Jerry, who had a lead role- Charlie was an Amish guy for a season or so), he being a notorius slut and committment-o-phobe.
Well, he lived up to his rep, and the show- all two hours of it- was highly entertaining. Crazy women, catty women, older women who were just shocked that ther would be- oh my- dancing on tables and drinking liquor! I wondered when they’d turn Elimidate into an ongoing series…
I know this is TWoP early, but, well, anyone else tune in?

Okay, I watched it.

But I didn’t like it. I only had it on because there was nothing else on. I swear.

I really didn’t like it. Lots of crazies this time around. Lots of catty skanky bitches, too. I’d like to think that when they see the tape, most of them will be embarassed about what moronic, giddy little twits they came off as.
And I knew the guy looked familiar. He seems kind of like an asshole that comes off as sincere at first. A good bullshitter, but raises my hackles, he does.

Jesus Christ, how many jobs can Jerry procure for his no-talent brother?

I think it’s kind of nice – I sure wish I had a family member watching out for me like that! Course, it doesn’t mean I’m going to watch or enjoy anything that Charlie’s in, but still.

Yeah, he came across as okay for the first half hour or so – but my god, what a sleazeball.

Could you believe how much tongue that one skanky ho gave him?

And the “model” in the shades – wtf?

And bikini-model-by-day-FBI-agent-by-night – hee!

I do believe we’re watching the Bachelor jump the shark. Hard to say, since the show started out on a jetski. I do like the whole “let’s make the timing of the roses completely random” thing though.

But I only had it on because, uh, … the cat hid the remote. Yeah, that’s it.

Now that I know Charlie’s sleazy, I feel I have to watch it, and I usually can’t stand The Bachelor/Bachelorette.

Wait, is Charlie O’Connell the bachelor this time around? Do they usually have celebrity bachelor(ettes)? Not that he’s a real celebrity or anything, but I thought they used real people in the show (I’ve never watched it).

They had some NFL QB one or two shows ago. (I haven’t watched regularly since Andrew Firestone. Bachelor Bob proved to be too much for me.)

I do have an uneasy suspicion I know what I’m going to be doing Monday nights at 9:00, though.

Just like Alex! And Aaron! (I kinda liked Andrew, who was the last one I saw.)

I don’t watch anymore, but I still have nightmares of Aaron kissing girls and slapping his big ol’ hand up the side of their face. Eew.

–Cliffy

clears throat
Jesse Palmer, fellow alumnus of the University of Florida. (Go Gators! :D)

First off. I didnt’ watch it. I have NEVER watched the Bachelor and I will not watch the Bachelor.

That beings said, my wife watched it. She said to me. “You know Jerry O’Connell”

Me: “Yes”

Her: “Well his brother is on the Bachelor”

Me: “You mean Charlie?”

Her (shocked): “You heard of him??!?!?!?”

The sad part is the two of them play brothers in the movie “The New Guy” and I told her that they were brothers in real life. Guess she didn’t remember.

Me: (Walks into room) “What are you watching?”

Wife: “It’s a new The Bachelor”

Me: “Good GOD! They’re all a bunch of dogs!”

Wife: “They’re not wearing any make up and haven’t showered.”

Me: “Why the hell NOT?” (Leaves room)

Oh my God, how could I have forgotten creepy-ass Bob?

The Bachelor originally used real people (consultant Alex, bank-scion Aaron, chherleader and Alex cast-off Trista). In an effort to compete with Joe Millionaire, the show got a “real millionaire” (Harvey Firestone’s grandson Andrew; the family is out of tires and in wine now), and then Trista cast-off Bob. Bob seemed like a friendly, funny guy when he was a contestant on The Bachelorette, but turned into a horndog and boor when he was in the spotlight. (He also hooked up with ABC Family host Rebecca Budig during the promotional period for the show. They’re married now.)

Then the next cycle of The Bachelorette starred Bob cast-off Meredith (who also came off better in her original appearances than when she was top dog). In an effort to combat continually-slipping ratings they brought on quarterback Jesse Palmer for the next series and then another regular dude (pro fisherman Byron). (That season the girls picked from two potential Bachelors in the first episode, Byron and Jay; Byron ended up with Bob cast-off Mary who wsa brought back for another shot.) Most recently, the third Bachelorette series starred Jen, the last woman standing during Andrew’s run, she and Andrew having broken up some time before.

–Cliffy

P.S. Kill me now.

Hell yes I watched it! I was upset they let that horse-faced model Danushka, go. She brought the bitch like crazy. Add to that

a) No more rules causing catfights and trainwreck behavior galore
b) A drunk and obviously perma-stoned Bachelor blatantly indicating that he wants a fling
c) Hamsters lying about their age and then slipping up (“it was me twenty, umm, I mean TEN years ago”)
d) Elimi-Date style rose ceremonies

and I am hooked.

Did she ever specify what exactly she did for “the government”? Ten bucks says she’s patting down people for illegal fruit at the local airport.

Gotta be a joke in there about her patting down my banana…

I sort of watched it. I just didn’t change the channel for a while, partly because the remote was across the room. I was a little curious about it (I’ve never watched it before) and wanted to see how Charlie came off. I really only listened to it because I was online at the time, then I couldn’t stand the inanity of the chatter anymore and I made the effort to get out of my chair and get the remote to change the channel. I felt much better after that.

I can’t see how anyone can be so desperate for a man or to be on TV that they will behave like that.

By the way, a question that has never been answered to my satisfaction – WTF is a “professional bass fisherman”? Who pays this Fabio wannabe to fish? For bass?

There’s tournaments and stuff. Who knew, right?

–Cliffy

I totally agree. Giving a guy you just met your bikini top? Maybe I didn’t go to enough Spring Breaks in college, but I think you should reserve your boobies for at least the third date.