First: Diane, thank you for the best laugh I’ve had in a while.
Moving on: all of these reasons are honestly why I prefer reading (and occasionally writing) erotic stories to watching porn. In reading, I can imagine what’s happening, slow it down, speed it up… And I have a DAMN good imagination.
And denbo - good point. I always liked “Red Shoe Diaries” on Showtime for that reason. Hints at what’s going on, but lets my imagination take over after that. 
Does anybody ever watch “Compromising Positions” on Showtime? I could write/direct/create better porn drunk, and half asleep.
That being said, I’m with Falcon, reading it is much better than watching it.
Oh yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees. . . Reading is much, much better. I don’t mean the cheap pulp paperbacks that are filled with “Oooooooooooooooohs” and “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahs, I’m cooooooooooooooooooooooooming” not to mention typos. They just make me laugh.
I like reading Ann Rice (her erotica, not vampire novels, although I DO like the vampire novels as well. . . .).
Anyway.
I like reading other women’s fantasies, “My Secret Garden” and “Forbidden Flowers” by Nancy Friday are good examples. I also found the male version “Men in Love” interesting, but I related to the female versions much better and therefore get more turned on by what is written.
For a few years now I have continued an ongoing exchange of erotic stories written to a man I met online and later in person. We have met in person a few times, took our written words and made them come true. “Come” true, get it? Har har.
I have saved these email exchanges in a directory on my computer and can honestly say that they are pretty impressive. 
I’ll just second that one. Personal experience… Of course, I have very long (natural) nails myself. Unless one of them breaks, I can’t let my fingers do the walking as far as I’d like. It’s a good thing I’m creative…
Getting back in the subject, video porn does absolutely nothing for me, for all the reasons previously described. Plus, it’s paced poorly. By the time they’re finished, I’m just warming up. That’s why I prefer good erotic photography or stories. I can view it or read at my own pace. I can more easily insert myself into the situation in my own mind. I can let my mind wander a bit, and fill in the missing details of sight, sound, taste, scent, and touch. I don’t know who said that the brain was the biggest sex organ, but they were dead on. Sadly, the producers of porn today collectively missed out on that bit of advice.
One of my favorite erotic books was Wifey by Judy Blume. I was fourteen years old at the time and I thought that it was another of her children’s stories. Boy, was I in for a surprise. Now looking back, I wonder how was it that the librarian let me borrow that book? Probably cause I passed for 25 at the time, I don’t know.
The thing is, what would a virgin (like me), or anybody else for that matter, think after he or she sees how sex is portrayed by the adult film industry? would she think that sex something sacred to look forward to doing with the one you love, or is it just another boring recreational chore adults do?
[Andy Rooney voice] What I want to know is, why are porno movies more than two minutes long? I can see maybe three, ok, up to five on the outside for the Viagara crowd, but really, why aren’t they called " Porno Shorts" [/Andy Rooney]
Read Fear of Flying by Erica Jong.
Thank you.
Every man has a certain thing that sets him off. Apparently, blow-jobs are the one thing that the American male wishes for the most.
I, myself, cannot imagine the joy of “foot-worship”, or “latex love”.
If you want to impress me, show me your ass-hole. (Ladies only.)
I can’t help the fetish. I only know what turns me on.
I sooooo long to make a porn movie myself.
No, not because I think it’d be a turn on to be on-set directing women into weird positions. (Though I suppose if I do it right it would be…)
But it’s the total lack of plot, the complete disregard for production values, the annoying assumption that all anyone cares about is the close-ups of the squidgy goings-on, with no true erotic build-up, no romantic element, no actual empathetic qualities to draw in a slightly more sophisticated audience.
Okay, admittedly the majority of porn consumers are not sophisticated in the slightest, but purleeeease, can’t we have some variety and creativity involved somewhere?
I just want to give it a try. To really do it right.
And to have all my kinks included of course.
[hijack]
Byzantine said
You got something against rap music? I dare you to start that thread.
::makes best intimidation face possible::
[/hijack]
No kidding. Yeep. This is a question that has been burning my mind for years.
As for the plot driven idea, I’m all for it. I like porn a great deal and my main complain lies in this arena. I wrote porn full time for about 2 years then spent another 1/2 year editing for a publisher out of Quebec and my main complaint to the writers was plot/setting. (In porn, I think the two are VERY closely connected)
Sex is sex and frankly if you’ve seen three butt-reamings, you’ve seen them all. What makes a scene hot, and I mean really hot, is not the position or the pulchritude of the participants, but the set-up and execution of said scene.
Wether it’s the written word or on film, it’s the seduction and emotional content of the scene (or lack thereof) that determines how effective it’s gonna be. It doesn’t have to be a plot driven movie to interest me, just a plot driven scene.
PWPs: I agree. I can only stand porn without plots when the action has something special or unusual about it. Otherwise, I insist that my porn have a plot, and when I write erotic stories, it almost always has some kind of a plot.
I’m sure they involve meeting lusty strangers over an internet message board…
I had understood that Greenwood Cooper (among others) produces more “romantic” porn films - true? Anyone know of any others? (I’m speaking from a queer POV, that is.)
Esprix
I, for one, don’t need a lot of plot in a porn video unless it relates to a hot fantasy, e.g., coach and football player. I hate flicks with twinkies and nelly-sounding guys.
I like porn with blue collar guys, jocks, body builders, and guys with tatoos. Ty Fox, Cole Tucker, and the luscious Zak Spears float my boat. I don’t want romance and violins, I want some hardcore shagging.
[gratuitous hijack]
It has been said that I will admit to anything, if it is true and will get me a laugh. This is typically true, but this one embarasses me more than the average admission.
I get a strange thrill from making my Sims hook up. I have no idea why, but it just gets me excited. Not so much SEXUALLY excited, but a little anxious.
[/gratuitous hijack]
I also don’t mind plotless porn but it is no ecxcuse to make the porn pointless as well. Why don’t many of the porn stars make an effort to make someting visually and or audibly memorable?
Ya want memorable? Rent a porn bloopers tape - THAT is a riot!
Esprix
Well, it looks like I may be the only one but put me down as being a man that prefers written porn to video porn. At least when alone, if I’m not the only one in the room then videos allow for more distractions.
Diane – I actually wrote the “blurbs” on the back of the video boxes. At times, I also wrote the “blurbs” for photo spreads in a magazine.
However, I have also written erotic books. I have never done a “script” for a video play but yes, those do have scripts. Lame and silly as they are there is usually a “writer” behind them. Usually, the guy with the camera. And the bulk of these things are shot on the fly without a real script.
I have no shame about writing what I have. For the video “blurbs” the writer gets to watch a part of it, or at times, have only the most vague idea of what it’s about and you write a tantalizing bit to get someone to rent it. For instance, you don’t say anal sex, you say, “back door action”. In a lot of ways it’s like working for Harlequin Romance; everything is about euphemisms. You can’t say a lot of things so you have to be creative and come up with ways of describing what folks are looking for without actually SAYING it. It gets really hard at times and can be down right silly.
I do like the visual market but I have to agree with a lot of other posters: The written word is the best. Because I can visualize it. I can skip things I’m not into and focus on those I am. After writing a few erotic novels (at a pittance, let me point out; don’t think you are going to write one and get rich or anything) I think this is the very best way to live out your fantasy life.
So, go out today and buy some erotica books! Hey, you just might buy one of mine! And if you do, thanks, I need ALL the few pennies on the dollar I get for my work!
Do you speak from experience Hamadryad? (Anthracite crosses her short-nailed fingers and hopes…)
But they’re just so good for the afterglow back-scratching!
I will say that at least lesbian porn has improved noticeably, but it’s difficult to find stores that will stock all-girl tapes produced by women. 