Have you ever had a fortune cookie that almost made you believe that they actually chose the fortunes for you via some chinese mystic in the backroom?
My god. Yesterday, I ordered some lovely Pad Thai, then settled in to enjoy my fortune which usually ends up being the “suck fortune” that defines happiness or something.
Anyway, yesterday was:
Your trouble is not lack of ability, but lack of ambition
Holy Cats! I nearly fell out of the chair. Ever had an appropriate fortune?
jarbaby
Once, while eating Chinese with my now ex-girlfriend I got one that said, “True happiness is sitting right next to you”. Either they were wrong, or I screwed up bigtime. 
Actually, I had this experience.
Last year on the way to Graceland where I planned on proposing to my girlfriend, we stopped in Biloxi Mississippi for the night. We left our room at the Beau Rivage and headed down to their chinese restaraunt. After eating our meal the waitress brought us our fortune cookies. Mine was pointless as usual. My girlfriend’s however said “you will soon make a very important decision”. I laughed to myself and considered proposing to her right then. I ended up waiting for Graceland though. It was much cooler.
The next day after I proposed to her, we both had a good laugh over it. We still have the fortune.
that_darn_cat: Maybe they ran out of the “stick with your wife” fortune cookie 
(simpsons ref.)
A friend of mine once tried to hook me up with a guy who was under 5’ tall, and he took me to a Chinese restaurant as our blind date. His fortune cookie that evening read “Good things come in small packages.” Mine read “Keep on the trail to a bigger goal.” 
I’ve yet to see a fortune cookie fortune that didn’t read better when prepended to the phrase in bed.
mmmmm…Pad Thai…was it Penny’s?
I’m not sure where these sayings are from, but they don’t look all that Chinese to me. I think some sound a bit Shakesperian.
Some of the good quotes from fortune cookies:
“Well done is better than well said”
“Ask advice from everyone, but act with your own mind”
“The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do”
I saw this in a magazine add:
The hands of a customer holding a fortune that says:
that was not chicken
[sub](Smilies in the original)[/sub]