Ain't No Fortunate Son (SERIOUS Son Issue Follow-up, Friends)

Folks, I am happy to report that I have taken the advice of nearly everyone who responded to my plea for such, regarding my addicted young adult son, and my move outta town. My younger son & I are leaving at the end of this month, a mere 3-ish weeks away!

Addicted son had a run-in with the police two weeks ago that ended up with his spending 5 days in the local psych ward (tho nothing worse legally, thank goodness!), and thus forced into detoxification. After lengthy conversations with the doctors assigned him, I was able to persuade them to “heavily recommend” rehab for him, and he is now in an outpatient rehab situation. This is not ideal, mind you—I think he needs full lockdown, but it is a start. He has been clean for these past two weeks, but I see his resolve slipping. However, his friends were and are so worried about him that by his own admission, he is being watched on all sides. He is also applying for work, which is new and different for him.

Still—he is being left behind, tho it appears he has a buddy or two who will house him temporarily until he can get some work (and pay) under his belt. Consequently, I have given notice at 2 of my three jobs and at my rented house.

And the true good news? I took a 5-day weekend and secured a fantastic job interview in the new town, made it to a third interview over the 5 days with these folks, and they have been in touch every day this week to let me know that they are checking out references, etc. I believe I will be offered the position yet this week. Additionally, I have been delightedly accepted for part-time, or more if I want it, work at the Borders bookstore in that town (I worked VERY part-time for them here, and they recommended me highly to the other branch).

SO is thrilled to have me there so soon, and shows it every day most affectionately. Youngest son is ready to go, and have a bit of peace, himself. Only weirdness has been the petulant attitude taken by my day-employer & his office manager, who are taking my leaving VERY personally. Albeit, Jehovah’s Witness office manager is at the same time hoping to get one of her church friends in my position, because she feels the men around here need “some good old-time religion” so they will change their “immoral ways”. (She is often offended by the cursing/drinking that goes on amongst these construction types, and seeks to deliver them from themselves.)

I cannot even comment on the utter ridiculousness of that, but I leave her entirely to her appointed task.

Again, thanks for all the input and support, I couldn’t have done this so quickly without your encouragement. I have had some heavy burdens, and to see a lessening of them in so immediate a manner is a miracle to me.

This is great news! I wish your family a speedy recovery from the troubles you’ve had. It sounds like your son is taking some steps toward functioning as an adult. Best of luck to all of you!

Man, I’m really glad to hear of these developments, and will keep sending my positive thoughts your way.
Sounds like you are on the right path - keep heading in that direction!

Looks like things are starting to get better, and good on you for taking the tough love approach. It appears that your son may be on his way to recovery from addiction with the support and watchfulness of his friends and outpatient rehab center.

Best of luck for the future!

This is wonderful news, and I say this not to be a Sorry Sally, but just as forewarning - it takes most people more than one run through rehab before they’re finally and really done. I’m glad you’re not taking him with you as a result of his shaping up, because it might not last. But please, don’t think I’m minimizing the hard work he’s doing NOW. What he’s doing now is great and wonderful, and I’m so happy. Enjoy it. Love him. Just keep yourself and your other son safe.

Your prospects sound very hopeful!

As someone who has a lot of addiction in her family, let me point out: your addicted son will most likely need to try numerous times to get clean before it really “takes”. That doesn’t mean there’s no hope for him to stay clean now, but don’t be too disappointed if he needs to go back out, and hit whatever “rock bottom” may be for him, before he’s long-term successful at getting and staying clean.

Good for you for showing tough love, and looking out for your younger son and yourself!