I want all of your opinions on something. While at work, a female friend of mine asked me if a certain guy was better looking than another guy (both guys were coworkers). I said Guy A was definitely better looking than Guy B.
Then, someone who had been listening in on the conversation said, “What are you gay?” “Do you like men?” Um…what?
Why can’t I, as a straight guy, acknowledge that another man is handsome, without implying that I’m gay? Just because I recognize that someone is good looking, doesn’t mean I’m attracted to them, or that I “swing that way.”
To all straight guys: Are you comfortable enough in your masculinity to say that Brad Pitt is “good looking,” without fear of being labeled?
BTW, this seems to be much more of an issue with men. If a woman says, “Oh she’s beautiful,” nobody blinks.
I’m a guy, and I make comments like that all of the time. I am personally trying to figure out (i know, lost cause) what it is that women find attractive in men. My fiancee and I will be out somewhere and I’ll point and say “Ok, that guy is good looking.” She normally thinks just the opposite, but hey, she’s marrying me so I can’t complain.
But yeah, I comment on stuff like that and get weird looks, but too bad. I don’t usually tell people that I’m straight if they ask, cause that’s too much like making sure they realize that I’m not one of those “Gays”. Even if I were gay, so what? Deal. My normal response is something like just raising my eyebrows.
There are so many stereotypes/society no-no’s (like crying) about males that bug me. The whole “men can’t do anything remotely resembling feminine behavior without being called gay” is one of my top pet peeves.
Well Tracer, I know beyond doubt that I’m not gay. But, I find it curious (and somewhat offensive) that others would say I am, just because I say so-and-so is handsome, when asked.
And that Brad Pitt thing was just an example. Sheesh.
I guess Frank Wycheck is going to have to choose between Drain Bead AND myself then!
No, Zion. You are not gay. The next time someone says that shit to you, look at him, smile, and say, “No, I’m just confident in my heterosexuality. I guess you aren’t, huh…”
Clearly I can’t tell a handsome guy from a circus freak. For some reason, women around the world all go weak at the knees for Kevin Spacey and Russell Crowe, though to me they look extremely ordinary. (Maybe that’s the key, though you wouldn’t think so from the comments I hear)
I’ve learned I’m pretty clueless in the “what makes a handsome guy” area. To me, guys like Jack Nicholson, Harrison Ford, Russel Crowe, Warren Beatty…these are guys I wish I looked like. I certainly can’t say the same for the Leo DiCaprios, Ryan Phillipes and all the other androgynous “barely legal” hearthrobs that most women tend to swoon over these days. Makes me suspect pedophiliac tendencies are running rampant…but then again, to be fair, look at some of these pre-teens guys go ga-ga over.
Oh, and yes, Zion, you’re definitely gay. HOLY COW, you’re gay. Best make with the close cropped haircut and neatly trimmed goatee as soon as possible.
What I never understood is why, when most men are asked the question that Zion was asked, is the response usually *“I don’t know, I’m a guy, I can’t determine whether or not another guy is handsome,”[i/] the key words being “I don’t know.”
What is this? Is there something in the chromosomes that prevents straight males from determining handsomeness in other males? I don’t get it. I am a straight female, and I can ususally tell if a woman is pretty or not (by my standards, anyway).
Cristi: I think guys think that they don’t know because most of the time when we point out a “good looking” guy, the women we are with disagree. I can’t speak for everyone, of course, but that happens to my friends and me all of the time. So eventually we just begin to think we have no clue. I wonder if that is because women have a much broader range of tastes, societally? I.e. society has defined a much narrower “good looking” woman, so they are easier to spot and agree on? Dunno.
This is for guys who aren’t falling for the “If I say he’s good looking, I must be gay” thing, of course. Many guys will say “I don’t know” because they don’t want to be cast as “gay”. Those of us who don’t care just say we don’t know 'cause most of the time women disagree with us.
As for the OT, something about masculinity, social stigma and the objectification of women, blah blah blah. Satan had the proper response, if you even choose to respond (I say say nothing and let 'em wonder).
As a gay man, I know I usually have problems figuring out if a woman is attractive or not (except of course for my babe Sophia Loren). I usually ask a lesbian for advice in this case…
Ok I just saw a pic of Esprix, and I have to say, he is a cutie.
My fiancee doesn’t agree, as predicted, but thats just because she doesn’t like freckles. She has freckles, and I like them, so maybe the whole “grass is always greener on the other side” thing is part of it. She tends to like darker guys (as in brown hair/brown eyes types) and I like lighter women (as in blonde/redhead and blue eyes).
You didn’t. Yours was just the first pic I saw after reading this thread (I went to the Men of the SDMB one afterwards). Just using you as an example. Sorry if I offended.
