The “jealous” line is just being flirty and coy, unless you have good reason to believe otherwise. (I can’t believe how many people are tweaked out by the “jealous” line. I’m sure I’ve used it and I’ve heard it used many times–it’s all in the tone.) The “model and muse” is also just flirting. You’re over-reacting. He digs you and wanted some hint in return that you might dig him.
Not that I’m a good judge, but I read this as slightly creepy, or, better to say, a little worrisome.
Besides, don’t do things for fun if they aren’t, right?
In fact, you know what? It makes more sense that our creepy sensors would tend to have more false positives than falst negatives. Responding to something as creepy when it’s not will mean you miss out on some opportunity. Responding to something as not creepy when it is will probably mean something way worse. We should overreact a little in general, if that’s what overreacting means.
The only creepy part is that you guys have been chatting for months and you haven’t met yet. In my experience, when the method of getting together is not one of “natural” doing, if you will, whether it be meeting online or being introduced by friends, if it takes more than about a month to meet in person it either won’t end up happening or won’t be what at least one person was expecting.
Two months requires a lot of patience. I think he’s pushing for a meeting. I wouldn’t write him off but I think you need to bust a move and see him or drop it. Since he carries a recommendation (not just some stranger you met in a dating site or a chat room etc.), that ought to mean he’s harmless enough.
Also, FWIW, your friends’ taste: on the few occasions when others have set me up, I always wondered wtf they had been smoking when they made their selection. I’d never tell them that, though: they’re trying to be kind. Point being, maybe they just think he’s nice and you’re nice and that’s all the thought behind it.
I also wanted to add that if you’re put off by his misspelling of kimono, then you truly might need to just skip this one. Because if he’d really like to get to know you better and has been patiently waiting for months (and all his quasi-flirting attempts have apparently failed), yet you might not be interested over such small issues… well, I’m sure you’d both be happier not pursuing anything beyond a friendship.
In regard to the misspelling of kimono… I’ve misspelled lots of things, especially while typing, including “hte” instead of “the”. Mistyping kimono doesn’t necessarily mean he’s an idiot. 
I think it’s creepy that you think it’s creepy. What sort of bizarre, anhedonic Elizabethan convent of an existence do you inhabit where you find flirting to be tantamount to stalking? Get years of therapy, then try making connections with your fellow human again.
Repeatedly telling someone you haven’t actually met or dated yet that you’re “jealous,” goes beyond normal flirting. It is not his place to be jealous. That’s a sign of either unwarranted possessiveness or utter flirting ineptitude.
How old are you? How old is he? I mean, if you’re both in your 30s, then it’s creepier than if you’re both 16.
And what’s with the religion thing? If you’re dealing with religious nuts that would be scared off by you being agnostic, then it definitely pings the Creep-o-meter.
So in other words, I need more information.
True, but he might have “teh Kay.”
This is the key, IMO. You’ve never dated? It’s hard enough to get a read on subtle flirting, non-verbal cues, etc in person. I can’t imagine trying it for the first time via bytes and pixels. Even if you’ve played the field for a while it’s not easy for some people. Trying to give it a go for the first time via electronic media–well, no wonder you are aprehensive.
I was a late bloomer dating wise. I made mistakes; I learned. I look back and think, my God, how did I miss the signs? I had a couple of women almost throw themselves at me and I was clueless, and I had women I was stuck on who had no interest, and I was likewise clueless. The only way to sort through you feelings and expectations, not to mention picking up on social cues, is to get out there and interact in the real world.
This guy might be a total creepazoid loser. He might be shy and awkward and make a few missteps trying to flirt, but be a real catch. You will never know for sure (barring some real danger signs–which I don’t see from your OP) unless you meet him. Go out for a couple of drinks. See a show. Meet at a venue of shared interst.
Then you will have a better picture upon which to judge.
She’s got an online relationship with an Arthurian knight? Yeah…that’s creepy.
you could always redirect his statements and say things like: You’re just like the big brother I never wanted (or wanted, or killed - whatever works for you)
You could tease him about sounding creepy
FWIW, a while back, I struck a connection on line with a fella 2 states away. We were extremely sympatico on line, and had several hour-plus phone calls. We were in the process of arranging a RL meeting. He commented something about having to go out of town for a spell, I, I thought jokingly, commented as long as it wasn’t with another woman, I was fine with it. Then several days went by without contact of any kind. I’d made him uncomfortable and he nipped it in the bud, citing distance as the major factor.
Be honest with Kay is all I have to say.
If it makes you feel uncomfortable just be honest.
When flirting with a woman, obviously the responsibility is on your shoulders to make sure you do it in a way that, well, works.
I’ve used the jealousy thing before in flirting and it worked well, but that was all in real world situations. It’s just too easy to misread and misinterpret meaning in chat or e-mail.
A guy saying he’s a little jealous in this context (as long as he doesn’t keep harping on it) is most likely, 95% sure, just his way of saying that he has a romantic interest in you. It’s a hard thing to judge with women because a lot of them don’t like jealous types, but, at the same time, a lot enjoy the feeling that a guy will get mildly jealous over them. It makes them feel more… I don’t know, really, having never been a woman. But a lot are like that. He could just be testing the waters in what he feels is a slightly risky, but probably harmless way.
Hehe, yeah that’s true. I’m also busy with work and school and homework and trying to keep up the house.
It’s not that she’ll stop being my friend or that I want to hurt her feelings. It’s kinda stupid. And somebody’s going to say I’m an idiot for it. We both go to this Christian camp. Last year I kinda lied on the application where it asked what God did in my life the previous year. I just listed all the good stuff that happened. If he exists, he caused them, right? I don’t want to stop going to camp, cuz I have a good time and my friends are there. And since I’m support staff I don’t really have anything to do with any devotionals or Bible studies or anything. But if I tell her, she might tell the camp directors and then I wouldn’t get to go. And I don’t really need another person worrying about my soul (I told my mom recently :rolleyes: Oh, boy, major melt-down. Again, I can’t read people very well.)
Okay, Kay’s emailed me back and everyone else was right and I was wrong. And now you all know that I’m socially backward. Oh well.
Not any that I know. It’s not his real name. It’s policy (as per my sig)
I’m kinda a spelling stickler. And he did do it the same way multiple times. Although now that I look at the keyboard, it could easily be a typo (he typed komono). I’m really not planning on dating him (mostly just because I’m not really ready to date), but I’d like to be friends.
I’m 27, I think he’s around the same age.
I’m a late bloomer for basically everything social. It’s not like I’m a hermit - I work, I’m in college, I go to RenFaire - but I not one of those people who likes going out all the time. I’m not good at spontaneous outings, especially if it involves a long drive first. Lately I haven’t even being seeing my parents a lot - only about once every two weeks or so - because I’ve been busy doing homework.
I tend to only really attract geeks, which is totally fine with me. I’m pretty sure Kay isn’t the most socially ept person either.
and seriously, I wish my fingers would stop typing the wrong words and skipping words. sheesh
Well turned. I also think that calling him “Kay” is kind of odd. Next time say his name is something like “Rock Studbrick” or something.
Or Chuck Hugelarge.
(Sorry.)