Babies . . . meh. I will hold the newborn child of a friend or relative, if the opportunity is offered, just because I don’t get to do it very often. But after a few minutes I’m done and you can have him back, thanks. Heck, the first time I held a very young baby, Mr. S had so show me how to keep jiggling her a little bit, instead of standing there stock-stiff-frozen as I had been doing.
Only once have I gone ga-ga over a baby. This one was just ridiculously cute (full head of black hair, huge blue eyes), and I HAD to hold her. Don’t know what came over me.
Show me a puppy, however, and I lose my frickin’ mind.
Some mancubs are engaging and relatively interactive-responsive to auditory and visual stimuli, sneeze cutely, something. Most, IME, are about as interesting as a ham. Call me when they grow an interesting personality (key word: interesting. That weeds out about 75% of all humans).
Really? I had no idea. Is that in general? Or just if they’re forced on you? I have a half dozen on my desk and honestly had no idea that their very presence was offending anyone. I don’t carry them around forcing others to look at them - they’re just for me, because I hate my frickin job and every day is a nightmare for me, and being able to look at my kid gives me a spark of happiness in my day. Should I put 'em in a drawer?
I do not like children. I do not like being expected to like them or take care of them. I spent a whole summer teaching children because someone told me I’d be wonderful with them, in hopes that my dislike was more due to inexperience.
Nope, I don’t like them. As a general rule, they inconvenience me. Someday, if I decide to have kids of my own, I will happily be inconvenienced by them. Until then, I don’t want to be inconvenienced by anybody else’s children.
That may sound harsh. I draw the line at referring to human beings as things like ‘‘crotch fruit’’ and ‘‘fuck trophies’’ (though the latter is pretty funny) because that is a level of emotional detachment I never want to have from anything that’s actually alive.
I like specific people who happen to be children–my cousins, for example.
And for some reason I love adolescents, say about age 12 onward.
I completely resent that I have to worry about people judging me for this. And I’m tired of hearing I’ll change my mind later. I’m relieved by the mothers on this board who still don’t like other people’s kids. It means I still have a decent shot at being a good mother, someday. Someday, a loooooong time from now.
Not only do I not coo and cuddle babies, when one enters the room, I make it a point to leave. You know that saying “Children should be seen, not heard”? Yeah, they shouldn’t be seen either… although I do put on a pretty good front when it comes to relatives’ babies. My cousin had a baby earlier this year, and I thank the deities that she lives on a whole other continent and the extent of my interest included sending her baby clothes and a Dr. Seuss book (Green Eggs and Ham, for the nosy). I don’t want to see them, I don’t want to touch them, I don’t want to hear them, I want nothing to do with them!
Those conversations are fun. I’m more 17 than 31, but I already know I don’t want children. My standard response to those are “Fuck you”, turn around on my heel and walk away.
And god forbid you bring up adoption when they say you will get old, realize you can’t have any, and regret it. They act as if it’s some slap on the face that I actually thought about it quite a bit before making my decision. Putting aside the fact that I would be a horrible mother, I don’t want to pass on my defective genes! With the medical and mental history of my family, the kid doesn’t stand a chance. When I say “Well, if I get too old and really do change my mind, I can always adopt” it sends them reeling for a counter argument… then they realize they are idiots and walk away. Yay!
Add another one to the column of women who would have a hard time caring less about babies and kids. Whatever it is about them that interests other people, I don’t get. Babies actually look malformed to me. They’re all mutant-y looking. And the noises out of babies and toddlers? Holy god, how do parents not kill them? That biological imperative must be awfully strong stuff.
Anaa, at almost 41, I’m still not feeling the slightest twinge to have one of my own. I don’t see it happening any time soon. I posted this a little while ago, but it’s pertinent here again - when people bug us about having kids, our current stock answer is, “We’re not allowed to have kids” and leave it at that.
“You know, I don’t have anything against heterosexuals, but why are they always flaunting it in you face with their wedding and baby pictures everywhere???”
Chill. J’sP was probably talking about people who ask/demand we look at their baby pics. Because they usually get snitty when we say ‘yeah, looks like like a hairless ape. Any idea who the mother is?’
And absolutely, you should keep your children in a drawer through your work day. CPS laws in your state may not concur, however, check local laws, etc…
I decided a long time ago that I wouldn’t have children. I simply don’t have the patience for kids or babies. Everyone said I’d change my mind, but I’m firmly of the opinion that people who don’t want children, shouldn’t have them. I think it would significantly reduce child abuse, for one thing. And for another, some people shouldn’t breed, due to health issues of one kind or another.
Elret, personally, I don’t mind baby pictures on your desk. That’s sweet and it tells me that you like to see your family during the workday. It’s the taking them out and passing them around and insisting that I look at all 10,000 of them that drives me nuts. Please don’t show me a minute by minute documentary of the birthday party/circumcision/birth. :shudder:
I detest the whole “why don’t you want to hold the baby” conversation. I really hate it when I’m expected to say that the World’s Ugliest Baby is just adorable, too. I’ll hold the baby if you insist, but I’ll hand it back to you ASAP. I don’t mind the occasional housebroken kid in the office for a brief visit, but once the screaming starts, they need to leave. Immediately.
DesertRoomie would agree with you whole-heartedly, and refers to small children as puppies. She has absolutely no inclination of holding anyone else’s child, much less having one of her own. This is just as well – as a 46 year-old virgin, she’ll have little opportunity.
Oh good. I realize I sounded far more worked up about it than I really am, but that is more about my hatred of my job than my passion about having pictures on my desk, so sorry about that. I really like the idea of just keeping the baby directly in my drawer, though, and being Canadian I think it will probably be ok. We have no laws here.
I am definitely not one of those girls that gets all, “OMG WOOK AT DA WIDDLE BABBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBY!” whenever something under 4 is carted in to the room. In fact, most of the time I have to fake a sincere sounding, “Aw, she’s precious!” to get people off my back and so they don’t think I’m some sort of spy working for “The Man.”
But once I actually start playing with the kids, I am always blown away with how much stuff they can do. Whether it’s a newborn or a 2 year old, I absolutely love how my expectations of them are totally wrong- they are much smarter and capable of many more things than I would have ever given them credit for.
Though I will say, most babies are ugly. I often get death glares from my friends for daring to later say that a baby was not cute, but it’s true! Most ugly babies grow into cute toddlers, but Jesus H- babies are usually ugly.
Concur. Within reason, I like babies (especially when I can hand them off to parents as they become troublesome). I consider myself good at engaging their interest, and it is indeed true that when this is done they often prove much more perceptive and capable than many adults realize. It’s an important social skill to give off the small signs that indicate understanding; children don’t have much of this skill until they are 5 or so, and thus adults tend to be fooled.
Babies need a lot of care from adults; 200,000 or so years of human development has almost certainly tended to select parents (especially mothers) who find babies engaging and give them the attention they need to survive. So it should not be surprising that a great many people find this normal and even take it for granted.
I’m twenty-six with no kids of my own and no plans to breed. I’m caring for my sixteen-year-old niece right now and that’s as close to having kids as I want to come.
I like certain children. Not because I like children in general, but because I like those specific individuals. Babies, generally, are kind of…blob-like. There isn’t enough expression of personality for me to form much of an opinion on them and I prefer not to deal with somebody else’s blob. I’m sure that to those who spend a lot of time around the blobs there’s some expression of personality and identity, but I don’t instantly feel an OMGMUSTHUGANDSQUEEZE urge upon seeing a crotch dropping. They ooze and aren’t capable of discussing music, after all.
It’s when I’m cornered/followed around and forced to view the pictures. There’s one lady in my office who does this with her grandbaby’s pictures: “This is the baby holding the flower. And this is the baby sniffing the flower. And this is the baby trying to eat the flower.” I don’t mind them on other people’s desks; in fact, I kind of wonder about people who don’t have some kind of pictures on their desks (family, vacation, the company picnic where the VP fell on his face, etc.).
