For those who aren’t aware, Ambivalid recently created a “relationship breakup thread”. Yes, Yes, hardly original but whatever. Seems he arrived home after popping out for a few hours to find his lady had bailed on him, taking all her stuff without warning. So, why am I creating this thread? Normally I’d simply walk away and tell him to talk to the hand, but something got under my skin about this. There’s a really offensive double standard he’s currently using to manipulate an endless flood of empathy towards him. But it’s so subtle most punters here aren’t aware how he’s doing it. Now, before I go on, quite correctly, I was warned by a Moderator to stop psychoanalysing his posts, his motives, his conclusions etc etc. I was given an official warning, which I accept without question. I was warned my psychoanalysis was unwelcome, that I had nothing to contribute to the thread. Fair enough, dem’s da rules.

But here’s the double standard. The very psychoanalysis which Ambivalid found so distasteful, so odious and repugnant during his period of loss and mourning, is precisely the same psychoanalysis which Ambivalid is now happily using to trash a seemingly lovely young lady, behind her back, who has no right of reply. And to that sir, I say this… you’re a fucken coward. You’re a sack of shit manipulative scumbag trashing a young lady who has no capacity whatsoever to defend her honour. And in my book that’s the definition of being a gutless man. Worse yet, you’re happily manipulating your fellow SDMB readers into enabling you to completely avoid the slightest admission she left you because you’re actually a self absorbed, psychologically abusive head fuck.

But don’t take my word for it, let’s examine your own words. Here are some choice quotes from your opening post.

Yeah well, in my book you’re 14 year old attention whore.

Did you get that one folks, as he WALKED farther into his house? Turns out the dude’s in a wheelchair. And his blind sycophant supporters piled on me because I, the casual reader, was supposed to know this? He said he WALKED into his house for fuck’s sake.

Ambivalid? What a croc of shit. A great relationship you say? Turns out you think your girlfriend is damaged goods. It turns out you’re even more batshit crazy yourself.

You have no idea mate? Not one single teeny weeny little idea? You haven’t got the faintest idea what she was feeling? Totally blindsided you, did it? What an over-the-top dishonest crapfest your OP actually is.

Oh your poor possum, such a mystery it is. Poor innocent you, clearly your only solution was to do something you’re not normally one to do, but you were left with no choice. You simply HAD to share this on the internet for all the world to see , so that you might solve this utterly unfathomable mystery. Yes, yes, we know… you didn’t want to. But you HAD to.

And now, some choice quotes from later in his thread which portray just how fucked up this dude’s logic is…

So Ambivalid, you still reckon you’ve got NO IDEA why a sweet pretty young lady (10 years younger than you without disability) had a gutfull of being your unpaid 24x7 personal carer? Presumably without a job, stranded 2000 miles from home, family, and her life network of friends? No new friends in real life, isolated on a permanent basis with YOU in your home? Without even so much as a car to get out of the house? And you’re in a wheel chair? You must be such a fucking catch mate, not to have ONE SINGLE IDEA why she bailed. OK, let’s run with that…

What the fuck? What planet do you live on? Has it ever occurred to you that your former girlfriend, unlike you, isn’t a fucking conflict junkie?

Well fuck me? It must have been her mental well being? How could we have not seen this? It couldn’t possibly have been your behaviour, could it?

Show some fucking balls mate. Do you have any manliness in you at all? She bailed on you because you’re a fucken nutcase, you’re 10 years older than her, you were screaming at her all the time, and you’re in a wheel chair. PLUS, she was your personal bit of tail, your personal 24 x 7 carer, you had her locked up in a house with no friends, family, or transport. She left because she’s not well? Keep telling yourself that mate, you gutless coward.

Well of course you would, you’re the one in denial. How can you play the victim otherwise?

So now the truth comes out. You’re a moody prick, you’re hard fucking work, and she was stuck in a house with you, without a car, no family or friends, 10 years younger than you, presumably a young lady with plenty of options, wondering to herself “How the fuck did I end up here?”

Bottom line? She dumped you, good and proper, because she made a decision in her best interests. But are you man enough to admit that? Nooooo… far easier to fall back on Plan B. Time to start trashing her mercilessly… THAT will make you feel better, won’t it?

This one’s gold… “But I loved her. We were close, had unbelievable chemistry, seemed to intuitively understand each other.” Followed by this, 24 hours later… “But, in hindsight now, I see that the relationship never really stood a chance in the long run.” And you know why you’re saying that? You’ve manipulated your audience into believing your girlfriend has Borderline Personality Disorder, and now that everyone’s agreeing with you, and offering stories on how unbearable it must have been for you, there’s no other choice. That’s the bullshit line you have to peddle now.

It took YOU a while to come to terms with this? How about for one microscopic nanosecond, how about looking at this bullshit from a perspective other than your own? How about you consider how long it took HER to come to terms with your volatile temper, and all the other shit that came with being in a relationship with you? How about you stop trashing her character mericlessly behind her back, be a fucking man for once, and admit you fucked up?

Jesus. Man, go for a bike ride or something.

You were completely tone deaf in that thread. **Ambi **had just experienced an awful shock, it was not the time to start telling him what had happened was his fault.

He needs time to process what has happened, firstly dealing with the sadness and upset. Then, and maybe then, he’ll be ready to take a look at himself and see what he may have done that contributed to what occured.

People seem to forget that there is a person behind every post on this forum. Sometimes a little kindness and sympathy goes a long way. I really hope you don’t treat your real life acquaintances in the same way you treated **Ambi **in that thread.

You DO realize you just effectively started your own pit thread right? Do you really think people are going to dogpile Ambi? Are you really that fucking obtuse?

Or did you get a taste for attention, and now you want more of it? Since the Mods think you were being such a dick in that other thread they ban you from posting in it, your only alternative is to start one here in the Pit. Under the guise of pitting Ambi. Only except, you know this thread is going to be all about you.

Happy trolling dude.

Okay, OP, I saw the thread you were talking about, and didn’t read it, because it got so long I figured it either got train-wrecked or turned into this endless list of personal anecdotes. I read the first couple of paragraphs of your OP, and skimmed the rest. Based on that, as a relatively unbiased observer, I’d like to ask this:

What’s the purpose of this thread? What message do you want me, as someone who knows relatively little and is not at all invested in this whole thing, to get out of it?

Leaper: It did turn into a train wreck, mostly at the hands of the OP of this very thread.

Boo Boo Foo: Ambivalid is far from being my favorite poster; however, there’s really no reason for you to pull this stunt. You’ve accused him of being an attention whore…yet, what do you think this thread shows you to be?

I suspected Boo hoo would soon be involved in a Pit thread, but I didn’t think he would be stupid enough to actually start the damn thing!

Which just implies a certain level of trolling going on, nobody is really that tone deaf. Pity, obvious trolling isn’t much fun really.

I’ll save you Milady! Come, squire. To the internet!

Fucking dork :rolleyes:

Shhh, don’t stir up the crazy person again.

Couldn’t say this in the other thread. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to say it here.

Ahem. You’re a fucking asshole. Now go the fuck away.

Please have some consideration for the chicken. Yes, she was flattered at first, but she’s long since become sore.

Bad choice starting this thread man. Do you think you’re somehow going to win this?

You need a hobby. Or medication.

Boo Boo Foo, your rabid obsession with Ambivalid makes it clear you are mentally unbalanced. It’s like you are a sociopath with a crush on him, or something. Get help.

It’s so unsubtle that most punters here aren’t aware how he’s doing it.

I don’t think it’s pure trolling, though. The butthurt and wounded pride seem embarrassingly genuine. A hard try to save face after falling on it.

So… here you are doing that again?

  1. You have no way to know if this woman is “lovely” or not, that’s just you projecting onto her in hopes of making her look more sympathetic.
  2. A “lady” doesn’t bail in that manner. Neither, for that matter, does a “gentleman”.

Is that your professional diagnosis? What are your credentials for making such a determination?

Yes, people in wheelchairs still say the word “walk”. Blind people talk in visual metaphors. Etc., etc. This is not an “ah-ha!” moment or startling revelation to most of us.

We all bitch about people on the internet. If you don’t want to hear about his problems don’t read his thread. No one has strapped you to a chair, taped open your eyeballs, and forced you to read the thread.

Ambivalid is financially independent, sufficiently so to even support another person, reportedly drives a pretty snazzy car all by himself (yes, paralyzed people can drive cars), and can take care of himself. Where the fuck did you get the idea that he needs a 24/7 “carer”? He doesn’t. From his very first post here several years ago it’s been clear he doesn’t need a “carer”. In fact, he’d probably resent anyone who attempted role in his life. Where did you get the idea he needs “care”? Are you assuming that he’s a helpless cripple? His legs don’t work, that’s the only thing wrong with him physically. He doesn’t need help taking care of himself or his home.

Yes, because ducking and running like that is SUCH a sign of mental health…:rolleyes:

Yes Ambivalid has his issues (we all do) but he wouldn’t sneak out of house/relationship like that. There’s not being a conflict junkie, and then there’s going to extraordinary lengths to avoid ANY conflict.

To be honest, probably a little bit of both, but if the chick won’t talk about what’s bothering her (you know, avoiding all conflict to an unhealthy degree) then how is Ambivalid supposed to know he’s being a dick/thoughtless/whatever? If two people never disagree that’s as odd and wrong as always fighting.

If you move to a new city yeah, you have no family around, no friends, and no transport - except you can go out and make new friends and Flint has a bus service. Sure, mass transit can suck, but I rode it for years when I had no car, it’s not the end of the world. He wasn’t keeping her locked in a back bedroom and telling her to “put the lotion in the basket”. From what Ambivalid said she was apparently about to get a car of her own so presumably she had sort of income.

In other words, she wasn’t a prisoner and she wasn’t helpless and she wasn’t having to take care of the poor crippled guy 24/7. That’s something you pulled out of your ass.

Well, yes, he is that… but so are a lot of other people. It doesn’t justify being a bitch in return.

I don’t know - do you feel better after trashing Ambivalid?

How about YOU being a “fucking man for once” and admit that half of what you’re trashing Ambivalid for you pulled out of your ass based on a variety of assumptions, not the least of which is the myth that wheelchair=helpless?

Heh. The OP is pitting Ambi?


Broomstick FTW!

I like Ambivalid, moody or not. I sympathize with his situation.

You, Boo Boo Foo, were a threadshitting jerk in Ambivalid’s thread, and this is the lamest of lame pittings and attention whoring to boot. I look forward to your roasting here at the hands of wittier posters than I.

Wow. You assume that Ambivalid requires 24/7 care simply because he uses a wheelchair? Man, you’re really aiming for epic here.

The beautiful irony of BBF starting this thread is now Ambi gets to have TWO threads to help him feel better.

Sure, Ambi could have started a pit thread on BBF, but the emotional benefits wouldn’t have been nearly as great as this thread here will be.

Because now, Ambi get to be in the fortunate position of taking the high road for not starting a pit thread against the OP. Even though he would have been perfectly justified in doing so.

HaHa! That’s fucking hilarious!