You’re missing a great opportunity here.
Embrace the grubs. You could be a supplier for Fear Factor. Collect them up and sell them for profit!
The Four Steps to Success
Grubs- they’re what’s for dinner.
Nope, just a Communist seeking to undermine the American way of life!
I thought they were all like that.
No, no - can’t be Frenchmen. They would have surrendered already, just from reading Brutus’ OP.
Let’s see - Brutus’ foes are small, vaguely creepy, somewhat disgusting, and don’t communicate much.
Brutus - your lawn has been invaded by Belgians. I recommend poisoned pommes frites.
Regards,
Shodan
A Pitting on lawn care. Only on the SDMB…
You’re little more than “the turd in the punchbowl” in the Pit.
But I’ll give you this much: That line is what I aspire to, and that was one hell of an OP. Napalm should fix your problems.
Pommes frites? My God, man, have you no decency? No compassion in that black lump you call a heart? <Runs off and googles ‘pommes frites’>
Oh. Twice-fried Freedom Fries (HA!). Well, short of flying to Belgianistan and purchasing some, I am hosed. I do not have the technical skill or courage to fry a potato…twice.
I will hand Coldfire this, though; For a 2-inch long squirming white worm-ish thing, he can type awfully well. (Although, I suppose he could be dictating…)
Well, once you lose the morals, the other two come pretty easily!
Does this mean that the grubs use the board or not?
No really…Do they? I need to know. 
Cause if you don’t, I will…
Admit it, Brutus, you’re Dale Gribble, aren’t you?
Oh, well, that’s all right then.
Carry on.
They do. In fact, I believe the artist formerly known as Dutchboy208 signed them up because they didn’t want to use their AmEx over the internet.
Man… and I just got used to your "ham"burgers… 
Good OP Brutus - I, for one, will happily sign up for your newsletter and whatever spam you want to send my way. May you be victorious in your fight against this evil.
Of course not - what a silly question.
Since the pommes frites idea is no go, I recommend the ultimate, most sinister, most dastardly way imaginable to forever rid yourself of these evil creatures.
Have Lynn Bodoni come over to your house and ban them.
Regards,
Shodan
For the love of God, no!
Save that for something really major…like the neighbor kids.
Nonsense. What do you think Brutus got the pesticides for?
Silly rabbit - Tricks are for kids.
Regards,
Shodan