ANOTHER Mysterious JFK-Related Death!

From today’s L.A. Times—

Jean Hill, an eyewitness to the assassination of President John F. Kennedy who became known as “The Lady in Red” in the Abraham Zapruder film of the killing, has died. Hill, 69, a retired schoolteacher, died of complications from a blood disease Tuesday at Parkland Hospital in Dallas, where Kennedy died.

—Hmmmm. “Blood disease,” my eye. It’s a little too pat that this woman would die at the tender age of 69, only a short 37 years after the assassination. And at the VERY SAME HOSPITAL where Kennedy died? Somebody call Oliver Stone—this is obviously another attempt to silence a witness!

That’ll teach her not to be the subject of a Chris DeBurgh song!

Er…

WHAT?!?!?!? ** she died on ** TUESDAY!!! Election day??? don’t CALL OS (they may be listening), send a message in code through the Daily News.

Has anybody noticed that her age, 69, is THREE times TWENTY-THREE?

23 skidoo!

Hmmm, the age of 69… JFK and Marilyn Monroe did some 69ing, this proves my theory - Marilyn Monroe killed JFK.

So, Marilyn faked her own death in order to put everyone off the trail when she killed JFK a year later . . . Makes sense, and explains why she had to get rid of Jayne Mansfield in '67 (Jaynie stumbled on to the secret) . . .

OW! Some guy with an umbrella just came into my office and poked me in the leg with it!

[cough cough]