Didn’t see a thread for this one yet. Figured I’d post it in the pit and save someone the trouble of moving it later.
He was arrested for masturbating in public in a playground.
Of course, he says he wasn’t masturbating. He was just urinating in a bottle. Is that better? Marginally, I guess.
On edit - he was actually in a van next to the playground. Somehow that makes it even creepier to me…
He was just establishing his credentials as a pro-family, God fearing conservative.
What’s wrong with that?
:rolleyes:
Is there a site somewhere, other than Dan Savage’s blog, where someone’s collected all the names and rap sheets of these closeted gay homophobes?
He admits he had his hand in his pants, but says he was peeing in a bottle. Inside his pants he was peeing in a bottle? I’m pretty sure that’s not an efficient way to do that. If he’s telling the truth, though, I’m sure he has the trucker bomb as evidence.
Also - hard to believe he couldn’t find a better spot than a playground. Has he explained why he was even at a playground in the first place?
Probably passing out cute little comics to the kiddies.
God, how I hate Chick tracts…
In fairness he was in a park, near the vicinity of the playground. It’s not like he was at a school or something. Playgrounds in public parks are public property; I can go swing on the swings if I like.
That said…eww.
THAT said…HA HA!
Don’t know about you, but when I have the urge to pee in a bottle, I ALWAYS go down to my local playground to do it.
He’s anti-gay, not anti-masturbating-while-watching-kids-at-a-playground.
He better not claim pornography made him do it. Got kiddie porn? :eek:
Not kiddie porn but he did blame porn.
From the linked article.
He’s saying pornography made him pee in a bottle?
If porn made him do it, how does he explain lying about peeing in a bottle when questioned?
Was it Satan? Blaming Satan is usually a good ploy here.
Yeah, that’s what I was referring to. If he was indeed beating off while watching little kids, then kiddie porn is a good possibility.
But I will say that the article really doesn’t give us enough info to know that he’s really a pedophile.
Well, one thing I’m sure we can all agree on:
Lying about peeing in a bottle while wanking near a playground certainly goes against the public interest.
Yeah, they were only little girls playing there. I don’t see what the big deal is.
So it’s another case of if the van’s-a-rockin’, don’t come a’knockin’?
What a silly lie. Where’s the bottle of pee, then?
If he was telling the truth, he would have slung the contents of that bottle under his vehicle as he partially opened the driver door.
Yes, more than once I’ve peed into a can while sitting in my vehicle. At my age…
Reminds me of the high school principal here who got arrested for taking an “upskirt” photo of a middle school girl on a bus. His defense was that he didn’t mean to take a photo, the bus hit a bump. Unanswered, of course, was why his hand was in a position to take such a photo and the cellphone was in camera mode.
Please don’t ask what the outcome of the arrest was. You really don’t want to know. Disappointment is a bad way to start the week.
I’m not seeing how this guy is a closeted gay guy. It looks to me like he’s a pedophile.
Now now, let’s give him a little bit of slack here.
I bet the next explanation will be that he didn’t really know what masturbation actually was. That he was taught that if he rubbed his penis really really strongly, he would pee white. That’s all he was doing. Not that icky masturbation thing, whatever that is, which is totally against God’s Will, perverted and nasty.