Rollins is a top heel and I don’t see that changing, so you’re not getting a “happy ending” by having him leave as champion. There’s really no room for him to be champ right now - either have him cash in and lose, or just hold the briefcase until next MITB and have him try and find a way to weasel out of forfeiting it.
I’m going to go one further on the Finger Poke of Doom scenario.
After about a month of not defending the tag titles, Authority Figure tells Heyman that they will strip them of the belts if they don’t defend them on the next Raw.
Next week comes, no Lesnar. Still going to strip them of the belts. Heyman says they’re now playing by the Freebird Rule and they’ll have a partner for Reigns in the tag match.
Match comes, no partner. Reigns wrestles most of it alone. Then he gets in trouble and…
out comes partner.
Now, who would that be? Well, I’m going to suggest that Heyman has said he does what he does for Family. They’ve been selling Reigns as doing it for his family. So who of all people could possibly be doing it for their family, be a badass heel and fit right in?
That’s right. The man who comes out and wins the match is… Kevin Owens.
Who then becomes the third man on Team Heyman.
I think of any “finger poke of doom” is happening at 'Mania, it’s between Bray and Taker.
I’ll go into more detail Friday with my picks, but I think the best course of action for this match is for it to be a Truce-type non-finish between these two and instead of passing the torch with a match/win/loss Taker passes it almost literally by somehow ending the match as equals
Yeah, as I said before, I don’t see any value in either guy losing this match. They’d be fucking stupid to have Bray lose it, but then, Difficulty: Vince. And Taker losing two years in a row? :dubious:
Hmm. I think I like that better than my original prediction, especially if it comes with the “Bray is 'Taker’s son” revelation.
In my opinion, the biggest problem with the WWE is its predictability. All our Wrestlemania matches were telegraphed months ago. The best outcome for these Wrestlemania matches is for the obvious choices to lose most often. Brock as often the part-time champion is certainly likely to win whatever PPV comes along. Where is the fun in that? Unless anything can happen, why watch?
Why watch? It’s cheap.
I would really have liked for UT to at least have showed up for a RAW or two to duel Bray with promos. The fact that he hasn’t been around either means (1) WWE thinks UT doesn’t need to do jack shit to get over or (2) They don’t want the audience to get emotionally attached enough to UT because they’ve booked him to lose. UT’s win streak is over, and will likely never be surpassed in this generation. He doesn’t need to prove anything new, and it’s not like he needs any more career with WWE than one match a year.
I don’t think that Bray will be UT’s son, bc Bray’s already established his identity and doesn’t need to rest on UT’s laurels. That being said, WWE did have an angle where Kane was actually Paul Bearer’s son, but they don’t talk about it anymore. I’m assuming Vince doesn’t want to repeat a storyline that fell as flat as Joan Rivers’s breasts, but then again he thinks nobody remembers what happened 3 weeks ago. Nevertheless, I’m going for the UPSET! BRAY WYATT DEFEATS UT!
I have no reason to pick against Cena winning the US title. He’s going to overcome the Russian Nightmare II’s Kuznechik Klutch in heroic fashion and make America proud while the audience hums Glory Glory Allelujah.
I honestly have no friggin’ idea how to pick Brock vs Roman. Heyman’s turned on his guys before, but the result was always a monumental push for the betrayed. Brrrrock doesn’t need that push. Brock’s been leveraging his potential return to MMA for every dime he could extract out of Vince’s ass. He’s going to work only a little more often than UT and make zillions. He’s got his money. He doesn’t care if he loses. So I’ll go with Vince’s wet dream coming true and a vick tor eee for RR.
more pixes later
Bray versus the Undertaker is not about winning. I think if anyone gets a pin, it is probably UT, but this is really about whatever bizarre events transpire and where it leaves Bray when the confrontation is over.
blah blah blah. The fuck are you people even talking about?
Did anyone watch NXT tonight? Amidst a bunch of promos, there was a solid women’s title match and then there was Finn Balor v. Kevin Owens for the NXT title (with like three commercial breaks). The first match was solid; the second was a 4+ that probably, overall, goes into MotY contention at once (but won’t make it, IMO; I’m giving it a 4.25-4.5 as a match of two halves, with the first as a 4 and the second as a 4.75-5). Started off slow, but built into a match that I think will be worth remembering, so it’s a bit hard to rate. I think I’ll still be trotting it out to friends to watch years from now because of the last half, so let’s call it a 4.75.
Now as I understand it, all of the major titles have been defended tonight–I didn’t get to watch Lucha Underground tonight, but on this episode of the Wednesday Night Wars, we’ve had the NXT Women’s Title, the NXT Heavyweight Title, the AAA Mega-Heavyweight Title, and the Lucha Underground title (#aztecgold!!!) were all defended tonight.
I challenge the Double-U Double-U E, as the letters no longer mean anything, to put that much gold on the line this Sunday.
Yes?
Yup, thought it was a darned good match between the two, especially toward the end. Balor gave him everything and he still kicked out and won the match. I’m really thinking that Owens gets the call-up ahead of Zayn, Neville and Balor.
Was one sort-of-botch in the women’s match, but it wasn’t important. Overall it was a pretty good showing by Alexa Bliss. She’s really improved.
After a two week break I can now do a play-by-play of Promo Cent…I mean NXT!
Alexa Bliss vs $asha: A good match overall because, as usual, you can watch a WRESTLING match instead of a “girls screaming for 8 minutes” match. $asha as usual was perfect, but I was impressed with Alexa. I haven’t seen her much, so I don’t exactly know how green (or should I say blue?) she was, but I thought she did well. I think I saw the botch too, she went through the ropes? I think? But either way it was a good match on her part. Hopefully she’ll get some more TV time
Finn Balor/Kevin Owens: Seriously they only had TWO matches? They taped this, what, a month ago? It’s not like they had to save their people for 'Mania. Oh well, this match was good enough to stand on its own. I won’t go with MOTY just yet (Zayn/Neville, Neville/Balor) but it was a good match nonetheless. If there is any downfall to Balor it’s that I don’t think he sells as well as he should. I’m not saying everyone has to be Zigglerian level of selling, but he needs a bit of work on it. I’m also not quite on the “promote Owens right away!” camp. I know he’s good, and I know that he’s experienced, but he needs to cut his chops in the NXT like everyone else and I don’t think he, Balor, Samoa Joe, or anyone like that deserves a free pass.
Promo Central:
-
WAY too many promos/commercials. I don’t understand why all the damn commercials for 'Mania. Shit we already have the network, why are you selling us on this
-
If and when Itami gets promoted he’s going to need a mouthpiece, but a two out of three falls should prove that he can go for a nice, long, match. Same with Breeze too (Especially after his injury)
-
I don’t know who that diva is that they’re promoting, but I’m pretty sure I saw her WAY back in October at the NXT house show I went to. We called her “stripper bitch” cuz she looked like one
-
Is Bayley doing a heel turn? Or is Emma doing a heel turn? Is Emma already a heel? Is Emma even a wrestler anymore? I don’t understand that storyline.
-
What’s with the superhappyfungroup giving Carmella a gift? More mind games for her to break up the best thing NXT has going for them in Cass and Enzo? Or just showing that they’re the superhappyfungroup?
*BAWANGAWANGAHHHHH
BANNNNHHHH*
Excuse me while I peel what’s left of my brains off the wall.
LU departs from its usual mysticism this time around and just gives us straight-up physicality. Former TNA star Hernandez, the Latin version of the Steiner brothers, is introduced at the beginning of the show by High Priest Cueto.
Son of Havoc vs Angelico: Just when I thought SoH was going to be the LU Jobber to the Stars, he and Angelico put on a main event level match and IMO steal the heat from the following match between Alberto and Texano. Angelico has an absolutely amazing signature move where he does a diagonal charge from buckle to buckle, does a gymnast flip over the corner, and executes a perfect 2-point landing on his opponent. SoH comes back with his own aerodynamic attack, publicly dumps the shrieking Ivelisse, and wins in dramatic fashion.
Alberto and Texano battle for the super mega ultra AAA grand championship of the universe title in a bullrope match: Not much room for aerial dynamics in this kind of fight, and Alberto keeps his shirt on to avoid rope burns across his nipples. Interesting twist on the ending: usually Alberto will trap his opponent’s arm over the top rope and hang on with his submission maneuver until the count of 5. Since this is no DQ, he didn’t have to relinquish the hold, so Texano could do nothing but tap out.
Prince Puma vs Cage: Exalted Excrement! Cueto emerges and presents the NEW LU Belt, and it looks likes something an Aztec god would wear. Both guys are superhuman. Cage does his powerbomb-lift-powerbomb-lift-powerbomb, and PP takes sick bumps and performs his own feats of strength. There was one beautiful camera placement under PP perched on the top corner, just as he did a reverse corkscrew somersault plancha (or something eye-boggling) on Cage to the outside. Another twist: because it’s a street fight, there’s no DQ, so Konnan gets his revenge with a cane shot on Cage as he’s staring down with Hernandez. PP gets the 630 splash for the win. Another potential match of the year, but I’m still going with Mil Muertes & Fenix from last week.
No lingering closure scenarios in LU: As soon as a feud is finished, they move on to the next one. Cage and Hernandez are already in place to feud, a battle between two strongmen. I’m thinking PP will next feud with Pentagon Jr., which should be stellar.
*BAWANGAWANGAHHHHH
BANNNNHHHH*
OLAY OLAYOLAYOLAY
What STC said.
OLAY OLAYOLAYOLAY
Their next taping at Full Sail isn’t until April 23rd, so they presumably have to get another four episodes out of what they have in the can right now. I have to imagine they’ll be taping at the San Jose show tomorrow night.
I had to go back and listen several times to Enzo’s anecdote that he’s telling Carmella in their promo, because I had no idea what he was talking about the first time. Eventually I transcribed it as thus;
“I mean, you know how it was back in the day. We were out there on Prospect Street, kid comes around, he wants to talk smack, it’s fine, he lived around the corner! Go to his house, he hit him wid’ a one-two bang, Cass walks in, puts the ice cream on the counter, we cook a meal, we leave.”
I still have no goddamn idea what Enzo is talking about, but it’s awesome anyway.
We should make an app that converts Enzo to English.
My name is Enzo Amore
My name is Enzo Amore
and I am certified G, and a bona fide stud
I am proven to represent an urban environment, and a certified good-looking gentleman
And you cant. teach. dat
This cannot be obtained via education in school
And this right here, this is Big Cass
Meet my compatriot, Colin Cassidy
And he’s 7 feet tall, and you can’t. teach. dat
He is 7 feet tall, this cannot be obtained via education in school
badda boom, realest guys in the room…how you doin!
We’re presenting! We are the most genuine people in the arena. How goes it friends?
And this is Carmella
This is my compatriot Carmella
And she’s hot as hell, And you cant. teach. dat.
She is very good looking, this cannot be obtained via education in schooling
Now we ain’t no chumps
We are not considered lower class citizens
And we ain’t takin’ no bumps
And we are not going to be hit very easily
But we lookin’ at THIS lump
We are derisively looking at our opponent
AND WE GON’ TAKE A DUMP
We are going to defecate on him
Cuz we’re the best
We are number one
And there’s only one word for ya, and let me SPELL IT OUT FOR YA
Let me spell you the word that best describes you
S-A-W-F-T saaaaaaaaaawft
S-o-f-t soft
You misspelled “HOWUDOIN”.
There has to be a better translation for this than that.
It’s a reference to an old basketball axiom: “You can’t teach height.” Either you have it, or you don’t.
Aww you guys are no fun!
I was all proud of myself for remembering what the speech was and making the translater and you guys just turn heel on me