April Foolish Mini-rants

The BBQ Pit
141

so I find myself unable to enjoy anything. It’s been months since I could focus enough to read a book. Or go running or hiking. Or take photos, enjoy my foster dogs, cook, post anything on facebook… I don’t have the energy.

I so wish I could be normal. Or just not be anything anymore. Normal has never been in the cards for me. The other is just a matter of time.

Part of me wants to say all my energy goes into surviving at this point, but it’s not true. If I could stop surviving just because I didn’t really have it in me anymore- if I had to get up and decide to survive like I get up and decide to go to work, I would have stopped years ago. It’s the stopping that takes doing.

so anyway. That’s my mini-rant.

142

I wish I could give you more help than this, SurrenderDorothy, but I can only say that once I was where you are and not I am not; PM me if talking to someone who survived would help.

For anyone else who couldn’t find the new mini-rants thread, it is here.

143

Looks like my starting time at work is changing from noon to 9am. I’m pissed about it.

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And worse than that, you’re living in the wrong month.

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Crap it’s May. Maybe the fourth will be with me…

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And for the rest of you who couldn’t find the new thread (like me, duh) it’s here.