Archie Andrews pops the question

And it’s not to longtime sweetheart Betty.

Yes, the perennially young comic book character has asked rich, scheming Veronica to be his wife. This does not sound good.

Will Betty wind up with Jughead? Or Reggie?

Going for the big bucks? Sounds right.

Moose. Later Reggie and Jughead will exchange vows in a private ceremony.

This is the stupidest idea I’ve heard all day. Veronica is a self-centered bitch, and Betty cares about him. Plus, he’s in high school.

I smell a Dallas/Bobby Ewing, it was all a dream twist.

I smell a GD thread in the making.

In a way. While driving to the airport, there will be a terrible auto accident and Veronica’s seatbelt will mysteriously fail.

Betty then shows up to comfort the grieving widower.

The plot is then foiled by the seemingly bumbling detective in a wrinkled raincoat.

Or the former detective who’s OCD and germphobic.

According to the story, the publisher says…

In other words, it’s some sort of dream/imaginary story/fortune teller’s prediction. Nothing to see here. Move along.

Yeah, this is the opposite of Superman dying. It’s never going to last.

Not in this story, he’s not. It’s a flash forward story.

From Newsarama

Wow. Betty sounds like an idiot.

Just a minute, isn’t/wasn’t Archie Andrews a puppet operated by ventriloquist Peter Brough?

This nefarious scheme (or a variation on it) was already foiled by a short, goofy belgian detective with a pronounced curly-Q mustache. Happened on a cruise ship on the Nile river.

Anyway, I’ll just bet there’s a last minute bride switcheroo in the works - Veronica will at the last minute wake up to the fact that she’s settling for Archie Andrews, walk out of the proceedings, and intended maid of honor Betty will be there to step in.

Pish.

Archie Andrews is by definition a kid in high school. No getting married for him.

What next? Curious George evolves into a human and is elected President of the United States?

Give me a break.

I thought it was all worked out that he gets Leno’s old job when Leno moves to prime time.

I’ve always loved Veronica. Bitchy dark-haired women, unite!

No, at the wedding Veronica wakes up to the fact that she’s settling for Archie Andrews and somehow it just doesn’t feel right. And then she looks over at Betty and Betty is looking back at her and the two of them realize what they’ve been denying all these years…

Best. Comic. Ever.

Yeah but the failed seatbelt will be traced to some fiddling done with a tool that has Moose Mason’s fingerprints on it. Although Moose will insist, “Duh, Archie told me that it would be really funny and no-one would get hurt,” Archie will testify that Moose was jealous of the impending marriage since his relationship with Midge had hit the skids.

His frequent vicious assaults on other pupils including his friend Archie, when they so much as spoke to Midge, are enough to convince the jury.

Thread over.