Are You An Alien Shapeshifting Reptile Person? I am. Allegedly.

Well, when they were handing out the black helicopters and the plantations full of serfs, I must have missed the memo, because I didn’t get mine.

I am white, male, college-educated, and of Christian ancestry.
The Establishment owes me, man.

I’m clearly a Reptillian because of my extensive power over international affairs and intrigue, but the interesting bit is that I don’t actually think that I’m a Reptillian. What’s truly crazy is that I don’t have the requisite eye color, my hair isn’t red, my hearing and blood pressure are totally average, and my eyesight not so good, and I’ve never even seen a UFO…

The only remaining explanation is that I’m so deep undercover that I don’t even know who I am, I’m not a standard Reptillian, and so I have to be some kind of Manchurian Candidate sort of Lizard Person.

We’re through the looking glass, here, people.

I am also a reptilian, which explains why I am always so cold. I wish I was better at the shape-shifting thing though.

There does seem to be a lot of us. I, for one, welcome our new reptilian overlords … I mean “us”.

The best part of the article is the radio bit of Louis CK grilling Donald Rumsfeld on whether or not he is a lizard person. I listened to the full version (okay, less edited version) and laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes.

Are you a lizard, sir?

…So that’s why I’m always checking the Pet Food aisle to see if they’ve got Purina Snake Chow on sale. Who knew?

Are we supposed to be surprised to discover that someone called Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor is an alien shapeshifting reptile person?

Alligator Woman

Everybody with low BP is reptile-compatible; apparently the relatively-low BPs around the Med are linked to having lizards up the family tree rather than to diet. This means the whole “start of Western civilization” thing was caused by a UFO landing!

I am not a reptile! I am Canadian!

This might explain why I can never decipher those Captcha “Are You Human?” tests when signing up on other sites.

Also, my prehensile penis.

Mice.

I just realized–this makes “V” A documentary. :smiley:

So that’s why I slow down every winter – all that cold is jelling my blood.

I know how you feel, I’m part sasquach.

Praise Bob

I can explain all my scars and my compassion for mankind, while significant, has limits.

Low blood pressure + love of space and science = reptilian ???

Only 1/3 of me is reptilian.

I am either a reptilian, or have one somewhere in my genetic background.

Rabbits. It’s [del]turtles[/del] conspiracy theories all the way [del]down[/del] up.

My mom has always said that my love of sun means I’m part lizard. This quiz just proves her right.