/me floats through the air down to the water, then flies through said water under the keel, into the air and lands on the deck on the other side.
/me proceeds to flip out, wail on a guitar, fly through the air and cuts the head off Malacandra and all other on board.
Not for throwing me overboard, but because Malacandra opened a window. Seriously, justask my friend Mark.
Hey, you don’t want to know what the room would’ve smelled like if I hadn’t opened a window. 
:eek: 
/me tosses the stub of the fake neck to one side, pops his real head out of the top of his coat, and proceeds to cock the hammers on an absurdly large blunderbuss.
/me turns invisible (which all Ninjas can do), slices the blunderbuss into pieces a la Wolverine style.
Keep in mind, we Ninjas cut off heads ALL the time and don’t even think twice about it. We are so crazy and awesome that we flip out **ALL **the time.
Remember, just like other mammals, ninjas can be mean OR totally awesome.
/me sets the decks ablaze with burning rum and listens out for the sound of effete Japanese screaming, slaps a round of grape into a nearby carronade and looses off at the noise, then picks up a big black bomb (with “Bomb” written on it in white letters) and stands there, fuse fizzing.
You swabs ain’t seen “crazy and awesome”, bucko.
How could you do that with perfectly good rum?? 
:eek:
/me cries.
A-harr! Us pirates just doesn’t care, an’ ye may stick that in yer fancy pyjamas an’ ninje it!
/me draws up a stool for the lachrymose one to sit on, slips the still-fizzing bomb under it, and retires to the other side of the mainmast.
Once agin’ I journeyed to Burbank California to set sail on The Red Dragon’s Revenge .
We re-fitted her since last year, lots of new rigging, gold trim, stained-glass window, expanded the dock, built a pub, a bridge and had a hell of a good time!
You may now proceed to seethe with envy.