Ask the complete and total asshole!

Why do you always drive so slowly in the passing lane? Why don’t you get the f**k out of my way?

Speed limit’s 60. I’m going 60. :mad:

That proves you’re an asshole. The speed limit is 65.

What, a “hole”?

What is the air velocity of an unladen swallow?

If you feel guilty for being an asshole, then you aren’t really an asshole; you’re a regular person behaving like an asshole. This ain’t How The Grinch Stole Christmas. My heart isn’t going to grow three sizes one day. This is a constant, consistent way of being. You don’t like it, you can…oh yeah, no swearing at you.

European or African? :mad:

I wouldn’t know. I don’t look at the signs. :mad:

Why do you call yourself oncecentstamp? Is that all you think you’re worth?

At the time I took the name, it was current and topical, as the USPS* had just jacked the postage from $0.37 to $0.38. Thus, in spite of their small value, everyone needed one cent stamps.

*The assholes. :mad:

You know, I don’t think you’re an asshole. I think you’re just faking it.

::pulls back collar of shirt up and over forehead::

I AM ASSHOLIO!

Gee, thanks. You just had to be an asshole in answering my question, didn’t you?

Are you just an arsehole or are you…

A Flamin’ ASSHOLE!!

Are you threatening me? :mad:

Is this your theme song?

Why dont you turn your frown upside down?

My friends say I’m an asshole. What should I do? Should I be even more of an asshole?

Hell yes. Nothing’s more annoying than a dilettante asshole. Go for the gold.

:slight_smile: Better? Now leave me the fuck alone.